Apparently Josh was taking me on the first day of school. I had planned to ride the bus. But he showed up at my house this morning for breakfast and never left.
He didn't even help me get into the car. He just threw his bag onto the floor and said "get in". Which was hard as hell because he has a pick up truck. He used to be nice. He used to be the best guy out there. But something changed. Now he's just a useless asshole...
We got to school and he immediately put his arm around my waist. I tried not to flinch as I felt his skin touch mine. He always does this. No matter how pissed off he really is, he never lets the school know about it. In a way, school is like my escape from him. In school, he acts like he did when we first started dating... good.
I try not to look around at people. Apparently I'm an easy person to read because when Josh first started getting abusive, everyone could tell there was something wrong. Eventually I learned to hide it and not talk to people. I'm jolted back into reality when a girl bumps into me. I try to turn around to say sorry but she's walking as fast as she can in the other direction. I only see the back of her. She has a messy bun that looks much better than anything I could ever accomplish.
For some reason, a part of me wants to go after her. To find out why she's walking so fast. To see her face. To see someone new. Someone that doesn't give a shit about anybody at this school.
Josh, seeing me get distracted, suddenly digs his nails into my side to get my attention. Apparently my "friend" Madison just asked me something. "Hmm?" I say. She chuckles. "I said, how was your summer? You only texted me like once the entire time." "Oh" I fake a smile, my side is starting to hurt now. Why won't he let go? "It was fine. I was helping out at a daycare most of the time. So I didn't have much time for friends." that was a complete lie. I had worked there for one week and then quit because Josh wanted to spend time with me over the summer. And by spend time with, he meant punch and try and have sex with me. It never worked. That's part of why he punched me in the first place.
The bell rang, and we walked to our lockers. Josh had paid someone to switch with him so his could be next to mine. He took me to my first class and I had to kiss him goodbye. I hated kissing him. It felt like kissing a dead dog. Something you used to love deeply but then something went wrong and now you just care about it in some wrong way that is unexplainable.
I walked into class and sat down. Pulling my bag out and grabbing a mint. (I swear, it's like he never brushes his teeth.) Today was going to be a long day. I could already tell...
