The Blind Girl That Taught Me How To Love

Just Because You Cannot See, Does Not Mean You're Blind

' ELIZABETH! ' I could hear my mom shouting my name. ' Come to the kitchen quick, I've got a surpirse for you. '

I sit up on my bed and remove the headsets from my ears, for a short moment I stare at the ceiling wondering what kind of surprise she had in store for me. I decide to get out of bed and go see what it could be. I walk to the kitchen and find my mom holding a single sheet of paper in her hand with a smile on her face.

' What's the matter, ' I say to her with a suspicion look on my face. She holds up the piece of paper in front of me and I adjust my glasses as I try to read it, but it's hopeless. All I can see is white with blurry black lines running across it. ' Mom! you know I can't read that, after all.. I-I am blind. ' I say the last few words silently because it's not something that I am proud of.

My mom walks up to me and places her hand on my shoulder, she then leans closer to me and whispers in my ear , ' Just because you cannot see.... Does not mean you're blind.' Her words touch me and I look up at her and smile. ' So, what does it say? ' I ask her so she can read it to me. ' Well! I applied for you to go to an all girls school for the disabled. '

I looked at her for a moment then I said to her with a sarcasm added to my tone, ' You monster! Sending your own daughter to a place of torture like that. Do I look disabled to you? ' I stand with my hands on my hips and give her the look.

She looks at me for a moment as if considering what I just said before bursting into laughter. We laugh together for a moment and we have a short moment of silence.

I break the silence by asking ' I thought they refused me to attend those schools because I am not completely blind yet? ' I say these words as if my condition were a joke. My mom looks at me and smiles, before replying ' I talked to the schools board of directors and they think it would be best if you started learning braille now, rather than when you're completely blind. '

I look at my mom and I hug her out of joy, ' I love you mom! ' she looks at me with a smile on her face and says, ' I love you too sweetheart. '

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

' It's been two years since I got into the school, I have learnt how to read braille now and it's pretty useful, now that my condition has worsened. Apparently I have a slowly developing blindness, the doctors called it something else but that was too complicated to remember.

Two years ago my glasses helped me to see better but now all they do is make things worse. My vision is already blurred and I don't need glasses to make it even more blurry.

The doctor, or eye specialist as he calls himself, says it will only get worse and I'll be completely blind by the end of the year. But I don't let that depress me, it was bound to happen one day and I already feel helpless as it is.

My mom always told me, "Just because you cannot see, does not mean you're blind." I've never understood what she meant by that but it seemed to comfort me when she said those words. '

My physiatrist looks at me for a short moment, then speaks with her usual soft voice. ' From what I've just heard, I believe you said you're ready to accept that you'll be completely blind by the end of the year. '

I sit up and look in her direction all I can see is the bright red coat that she is wearing, I smile and say ' YES! That is what I said. ' I can tell she is looking in my direction, though all I can see is a blurred image but it's good enough for me to know that she is staring at me.

' Alright then, you're dismissed. I'll call your father to come pick you up. ' she says with her soft voice. Her voice is comforting and I enjoy our sessions together, I feel safe and secure around her. "But as they say, all good things must come to an end".

Even before she breaks the news to me, I already know what she's gonna say. I hear that comforting voice of hers again, ' Elizabeth! It has been nice getting to know you, but I believe I can no longer help you. You're an intelligent girl who has lots of potential, I will miss you dearly. '

I smile at her and notice that I have tears trickling down my cheeks. I knew that this day was approaching and even though I tried to prepare myself emotionally, I have found myself crying.

I feel warm hands gently squeezing me around my shoulders and I realize that she is hugging me, I hug her back and it feels like I am hugging my mom again.
She holds me by the shoulders at arms length, looks me in the eye and says, ' I think I better call your father before he gets worried. '

While she is on the phone talking to my dad I begin to think of my mom, it's been about a year and a half since she died. I didn't take her death too well, I was depressed for about a year. I wasn't getting any better until my dad decided to bring me to Mona six months ago.

At first I thought the idea of a physiatrist stupid, but know Mona is the only person I feel free around. Just being in the same room with her gives me a sense of piece, before I knew it I was looking forward to my sessions with Mona. And now I have to say goodbye to her.

She gets off the phone and we begin to talk. After about half an hour of joking around with Mona, my dad finally comes to pick me up. I can hear his loud footsteps as he approaches the door. ' That's him! ' I say with a half smile on my face, ' Are you sure?' She asks to confirm and I nod my head.

She stands up and walks towards the door, she pulls it open just before he has the chance to knock. ' You two got me again. ' I look in her direction and give a big smile and even though I cannot really tell, I know that she is smiling back at me.

I hear my dad's almost animated voice, ' Okay kiddo, it's time to go. ' As I walk past her I can see the red coat facing me. I wait for my dad's foot steps to get a little further away from earshot then I whisper to her, ' Thanks Mona! '

I pull out my walking stick and begin to walk away, knowing that this will be the last time we meet. As I walk with my dad, I feel a tear drop and I know my heart is broken.

I wish their was a way for Mona and I to spend more time together but it cannot be helped. It is all a part of the job for her, she isn't allowed to spend time with me apart from the time that we have during our sessions.