Forget Me Not (HIATUS )

Chapter 3

Song:Gasoline by Halsey

Chapter 3

I wake up and my throat feels like sand paper. My eyes squint as they try and readjust to the world around me.

Where am I?

I sit up and notice that I'm in a bed and there's a needle poking into my arm. I also hear a loud beeping noise. I turn to the source of the beeping noise and instantly know where I am.

The hospital.

Looking around to see my surroundings, I notice that nobody except myself is in the room.

Of course, nobody is here waiting for me to wake up. They are probably at home hoping that I didn't wake up.

I don't know why in all of those books I read, somebody is always waiting for the girl to wake up and they sleep there all night long like the perfect person would. We all know that's not true. We all know that they're just trying to create a perfect image in our heads when in reality, it's nothing like that.

Nobody will be waiting for you to wake up. Nobody cares enough to do that. This is real life. Nothing like that happens here.... Or for me at least nothing does.

Nobody will ever be there for me.

I hear a voice and look up. It's the doctor.

"Oh, you're awake! Good!" My head drops to the blanket on my lap and I frown because I know he doesn't actually care if I woke up or not.

"How long have I been out?" I just cut to the chase because I don't need to talk about unnecessary bullshit, I want answers to my questions.

"Five days." I guess he understands because he keeps quiet like he's expecting me to ask more of my questions.

"So what happened?" I knew that I cut myself and passed out but I wanted more details.

"So basically, your cuts had been pretty deep causing you to lose a lot of blood but, luckily we got to you in time to give you stitches that stopped the bleeding. Unfortunately, because of so much blood loss it caused you to pass out and stay unconscious for five days." I took a moment of silence to understand what he just said. I'm so glad he said that in simpler terms not like some doctors where they would say something that nobody can understand because it's doctor talk. I like this doctor because he talked in a way that anybody could understand.

"Would you like me to call your brothers and tell them that you're awake now?" He asks. I just nod my head and he turns to walk out of the room.

About 20 minutes later all three of my brothers show up. They all have looks of sorrow on their face but, each of them cover it up with a fake smile as they see me. I wish I died.

If I just died I wouldn't have to deal with anything. I wouldn't need to deal with their fake concern or when I go to school, I wouldn't have to deal with the people whispering to each other about how they wished I died. Or, some people will act like they care and give me their pity. I don't want their fucking pity. I want to be dead.

I snap back to reality when I felt eyes on me. All three pairs of eyes were watching me. Two of those pairs of eyes were on the brim of tears while the other, had a look of guilt. I see who the eyes of tears belong to and its Sage and Liam's. The eyes of guilt belonged to Daniel.

We all just sit there awkwardly waiting for someone to speak. After a good two minutes of complete silence I decide to speak up.

"You guys can leave if you want to. I'm completely fine with being alone." Their heads all snap up and look at me confused.

"Why do you want us to leave?" Liam asks.

I gulp, knowing that they will be mad at me for saying this. "Because I know you don't really want to be here and it's fine with me. I'm used to being alone. I've been alone for nine years now."

"Amira, we don't want to leave." Daniel says soothingly. For a second I almost believe what he is saying but I know it's not true. He's just saying that to seem like a good brother.

"I know you don't want to be here. You guys hate me! You think I didn't know?! It's obvious that you guys just wish I died. Well guess what? I wish I died as well! I'm so sorry, I didn't. I'll make sure next time to do the job right." I shout at them.

I know they don't really care about me so, why do they keep pretending? I really wish they would stop the act already.

"Amira cut the bullshit! We love you and you know that. You are our whole world. If you died I don't know what we would do without you! You are such an important factor in our life, we couldn't live without you!" Sage shouts.

"Yah right." I mumble under my breath, crossing my arms and stare out the window.

"Oh my fucking gosh! Why won't you believe us when we say that we care about you?!" Sage yells.

"Because I can see it in your eyes!" I shout back, not caring if the other patients could hear us. I just want to get this off my chest. I've been holding in my thoughts for way too long. "I can see it everyday when you look at me. I can see all the pain you hold. Do you think you were good at concealing it? Because you're not. I can see the disgust as well. I notice when you're happy one minute but, one little glance at me and your some disgusted grumpy bitch. I know you guys really don't want me here. I know that you wish it was me that died instead of mom."

I turn my glare from all three of them and focused my stare all on Daniel. "Yah, that's right. I heard you and Liam talking about it. At first, I couldn't believe my ears then, after a while I could understand. I understand why you would want that. I want it as well. I just couldn't understand why my own brother would say that about me. Why? Why would you say that, brother?" I say the word 'brother' with so much disgust.

"Amira, I was drunk and you know that." Daniel says rubbing his face because he knew I got him.

"Bullshit! A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts." I smirk, knowing that I have proven my point.

"Amira, I fucking love you, okay? You're my fucking sister, I will always love you no matter what happens or what I say, I will love you no matter what."

I just scoff at him. "See that's where you're wrong. If you loved me then, you wouldn't have even thought about saying something like that and if you loved me then, you would have backed me up every single time you saw Sophia fucking bullying me! You wouldn't have backed her up! You would have backed me up!"

I can see the tears in his eyes but, he doesn't let them fall. That would hurt his ego too much.

"I love you both." He says barely above a whisper. I can tell by the way he's saying it that he's not only trying to convince me but, he's trying to convince himself as well.

"But we can clearly see who you love more." I feel the tears in my eyes too. I will NOT let them fall. Not one drop will fall out of my eyes. I've cried too much already I should be out of tears by now. "You love that two timing stupid whore." I scream at him with so much venom in my voice.

"She's not a whore! She's the love of my life! You wouldn't understand, you're so fucking lonely. Nobody will even talk to you! So stop trying to tell me things that I know are not true! You're a fucking nobody so just leave us the hell alone! I fucking hate you!" With that he storms out of the room and slams the door.

I give both the boys still standing beside me a small smile. I'm pretty sure they can see it's fake though.

"That's all I wanted. The truth."