Marry someone that makes you feel as if you are a poem.
The window in my bedroom gave me a view of evergreen forrest. Those evergreen went on for miles, and I knew it would be easy to get lost in the endless woods. From further inspection, there was a lock on the window, which I undid to slide open the barrier. Cold air rushed in, making me shake from head to toe. That's when I told myself I would much rather be lost in the woods without Harry than be in a house with him. I grabbed my coat and jumped out the window without a second thought.
The snow was considerably deep for my converse to get through. They were soaking within a few yards of walking. Before I knew it, the cabin was no where in sight, and I felt like I could finally breathe without consequences. I walked further until the trees came to a clearing, and a lake with a layer of thick ice covering the surface came into view. I sat at the chilly shore, my feet nearly touching the floating ice. I laid onto my back, looking up at the cloudy sky, and felt every single piece of precipitation touch my skin. It took me awhile to realize that it wasn't the snow making my cheeks wet; it was my tears. I seemed to be a professional at silent crying, since I did it without even noticing.
I heard his footsteps slowly before he came into my sight. I closed my eyes and wiped away my tears. He didn't need to know how weak I really was.
He grunted as he laid down beside me, then his teeth chattered together from the freezing weather. He copied my actions of looking at the sky.
"You okay?" Harry asked.
I stayed silent for a moment. "What do you think." My words came out as a statement rather than a question.
He paused as well. "Well, I guess I'm supposed to be asking what's wrong."
It was then I finally got to the good part of Harry as a book. The introduction was over. Harry is really bewildered at everything that involves regular communication that doesn't involve drugs and death. His people skills lack, which stuns me at how I'm just figuring this information out. This explains everything - his theme.
"You're a terrible person." I state dryly.
He doesn't move an inch. "I'm aware."
I swallow the nervous moisture in my mouth. "Sorry."
"Don't be. I'm no angel." His head turns to look at me. "I understand that I've actually ruined your life as of now."
I didn't say a word. I gave him silence, because I didn't know how to reward him for his acceptance and realization of himself.
"I never intended to fuck everything up, Brinley. I never planned to tear you away from your life and bring you to my plan B cabin in the middle of nowhere." He ran his fingers through his hair. "But I do plan to keep you safe."
I stared at the clouds a little bit longer before he suggested that we head back to the cabin. I agreed.
It was getting colder, anyway.
-
I woke up the next day to an empty house. I went into the kitchen to look for something to eat, which only happened to be granola and old coffee beans. I told myself that I'd pass.
I figured Harry was out getting food since we only had crumbs to feast on, and he'd be gone for an hour at most. I did find it odd that he didn't leave a note, though.
An hour slowly turned into five and I was miserable. My stomach growled, and I finally gave into one of the granola bars. It was stale but my grumbling abdomen could take it for now. The jingle of the knob to the front door stole my attention, startling me. Harry walked in with a bag.
"Where have you been?" I asked, not patronizing, but truly wondering where he has been.
He hesitated, walking over to the counter to place his heavy bag on. "Uh, to get some food," He paused, licking his pink lips. "And, erm, this."
He pulled out my journal from his bag and my heart dropped into my growling stomach. I no longer cared about the food.
I took Harry into my arms, which he reacted uncomfortably, but that only made me hug him harder. He deserved a little loving right now.
"Thank you." I muffled into his chest. He chuckled for a second, then pried me off in the politest way possible - this is, for Harry at least.
"You drove back to the city to get this?" I held the book in my cold hands. I still couldn't comprehend that this was real, this was happening.
He shook his head. "Massey met me half way with it. I asked him to stop by the flat to fetch it." He sigh. "But the Salvs have been in the flat already. Everything is trashed."
I frowned. "What were they looking for?"
He shrugged, but it was a shrug that said "I know, but you shouldn't". I hated thats shrug of his. I kept my mouth closed though, since he did something that made me a little more okay with being torn from my life without permission.
The groceries were set onto the counter carelessly. Harry ran a hand through his hair and let out a breath that sounded like he had held it for a while.
"You okay?" I ask, feeling it was appropriate and my turn to show that I care. Not that he did.
He turned to look at me. "Sure." He leaned backwards slightly, the counter supporting him to stand.
As long as he said something decent to my question, I knew he was fine. If Harry was really not okay, he would've not answered at all.
He ran a hand through his hair again. It made me weak at the knees and I worried about myself for a split second. Should I pursue those sensual thoughts in my head? How would Harry react?
I looked up to see him already looking me in the eyes. I held the contact, only breaking it to look at Harry's lips. I want to kiss them so badly, it made my lips ache with abandonment. I wish Harry could put his rough exterior and personality to rest for just a moment so I could feel like I would not be kissing the devil himself. Pressing our lips together would be a considered a sin.
"Want to smoke a bit?" Harry pulled a blunt out and held it between his pointer finger and thumb.
I nodded, and followed him to the couch.
You don't drown by falling in water; you drown by staying there.
