The Arrangement

Date

I've decided that I will leave. There's no reason for me to stay. It seems that I should have done this in the first place. What could the purpose of me being here be?

My head jerks up as a knock sounds at my door. I give a small 'come in' and Tyler walks in slowly. He closes the door behind him and comes to sit on the foot of my bed. His eyes look over at my journal and suddenly he jerks his eyes up to meet mine.

"You're not really going to-" I close my journal but Tyler holds out his hand and I offer it to him reluctantly. Tyler flips through, glancing at some and as he started to read the ones towards the end my heart started thundering in my chest. I'd forgotten all that I'd written about him in there.

Tyler's fingers trace over the words on the page in a mystical way. His eyes are focused on the words, truly drinking them in and comprehending them. I watched as his jaw clenched or he breathed in a shaky breath. His blonde hair fell forward, casting dark shadows in his eyes. I had to turn away.

"Jasmine." Tyler says quietly. I look up. "Jasmine, I don't want you to ever think that I... I don't mean to give you the impression that..." He looks down at my journal and closes it gently. "I'm sorry." He whispers.

Tyler stands as if to leave after that but then he pauses. "Jasmine, would you like to go on a date with me? Just you and me, no games, no gimmicks, nothing. I want to start over with you. Fresh." He waits for my response and I struggle inside of myself. "This is truly up to you. I don't want you to it if you don't want to. I'll be downstairs and if you want to go, meet me at the door in an hour. If you aren't there, I won't take it personally." Tyler gives me a small, gentle smile and leaves. I relax when he leaves the room.

We both know it's not truly up to me.

I slowly get out of bed and walk over to my closet. My hands go through my clothes and I chew on the inside of my mouth. I slowly pick out an outfit consisting of high waisted shorts and a crop top shirt. My shoes are just some flats and I start to brush out my hair, deciding to leave it down. I put on a little make up so I look like I tried a little for him. Once I was done I looked over my reflection and smiled.

I looked cute.

The rest of the hour I could use, I spent preparing myself for a conversation with Tyler. I'd have to really try. Finally, with five minutes left to spare I left my room and walked towards the front door.

Tyler was sitting at the door, looking at his phone. I stopped a little ways from him and he looked up, doing a double take. He smiled and stood. "To be honest, I'm a little surprised you showed up." He gives a small laugh. I offer a small smile, reminding myself to speak. Tyler saw my inner war and gave a forced smile. "C'mon, there's this great place I want to take you to."

Once I was in the car with Tyler I really focused on trying again with him. Tyler started a conversation, knowing it would be awkward and I surprised him by opening up and talking back to him. He was pleasantly surprised, I could tell by his smile. It made me feel better to allow myself to speak freely with him as though he were.... Well Jake.

I frowned at the thought suddenly. Jake was closer to me than Tyler was. In fact I was closer with Jake the day we met than Tyler and I were after knowing each other for years. Tyler noticed my frown and paused in his sentence.

"Hey, what's going on in that head of yours?" He offers a smile but I know he's truly worried.

"I don't know anything about you." I say quietly. Tyler's smile disappears. He looks at the road and then at me. "I mean I don't know your favorite color, what foods you like and don't like, your taste of music, what you dislike about people...."