Kate for Keeps

Seven

"Did you know we have the fitness test today?" Lilly asks me when I throw off my short in the locker room.

My stomach dropped and fear crept in at that. "I-I for-forgot." I stutter.

"I'm so nervous! I can't do curl ups at all! In gonna get a big fat zero!" Lilly cries out.

"D-don't worry." I wave off the topic if the fitness test.

Zero. that number is my least favorite because that's how many curl ups, push ups and trunk lifts I'm gonna get!

I tie my laces just as the bell rings. I make it just in time to sit done at my "assigned seat". lord I hate having assigned seats!

The two gym classes leave and mr.Rine starts to talk. "okay I'll test boys first girls next! boys in the mats!"

The girls go off to play basketball. I complaint to Lilly how much I do t want to do this. What really got me nervous was when he said I'll measure you weight.

I tell everyone I weigh 98 pounds but I'm really...107.8 so I don't look fat. that's my biggest fear is to be called fat. I know I'm probably a little overweight. I hate it.

I seriously want to cry now because when I look around all the girls are so skinny or perfect sized and I'm so...fat. I don't look look fat but I am.

The whistle blows and mr.Rine calls the girls over.

And the nightmare begins.

~~

3 curl ups and 7 push-ups later in stepping onto the weight scale. you heard me THREE curl ups and SEVEN push ups! I did HORRIBLE!

I shake as I step onto the scale. I'm afraid to look down but do it anyway. 107.8 pounds. just how I remember it.

It feels like God has betrayed me. I prayed for it to not be like this but of course it is. the lord would never betray me it just feels like it.

I sag over to the bleachers and sit. Lilly comes over so when she asks I tell her my height and...weight.

~~

For the rest of that day I'm laid back and clumsy. the put of my stomach holds that stress out, nervous feeling that makes you shake to the bone.

I'm fat and ugly. no wonder I'm not popular. who's want to be friends with me.

My life... I don't know I just sometime want to stop. I look around and see pretty flawless popular girls. then there's me. the ugly fat, shy girl who has only a handful of friends.

Lilly's face when I told her my weight was just so...so...full of shock. it made me feel so ashamed and worthless.

"Y-your...oh Kate!" to my very surprise my friend embraces me into a deep strong hug.

"W-what are you doing?" I ask taken aback. I didn't know I deserved a hug.

"You poor thing! you probably tell everyone a lie about your weight! oh Kate! your perfect! dot. Let anybody tell you otherwise! please Kate believe me!" Kate cries out and continues to mumble "oh Kate".

"Um... Okay."

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I run. I run. I run. faster and faster! no I can't slow down! Kate, no! you must run. run Kate run.

I keep demanding myself to keep running. the song I'm listening to on my iodine pick up and so do I.

My legs are seriously gonna die if I don't stop. I reach down to feel my belly and shake my head. I can't stop.

I reach the top of the street. my heart is pounding. thump thump, thump. all at once I drop to the ground.

"Ouch!" I cry out. rubbing my knee I look at my red legs. then at my belly. "its only the first day I remind myself."

My sides are now hurting and I can't help but walk for a while. I've now reached the top of my best friends street, Carley.

The song playing on my touch stops and a new one begins, Roar by Katy Perry.

All of a sudden I hear screaming "run! run!" I pluck my ear bus out in time to see Carley and Corrine running to me.

Corrine is Carley's other best friend that she met once I left to a different elementary school. I've always been jealous of Corrine and only met her once.

So wait! Carley invites her over after school and not me? I've been her best friend since preschool!

"Thanks for cheering me on!" I say and start running in the opposite direction.

"Go get slimmer!" Carley calls after me in her playful voice.

I ignore Carley pretending to be listening to my music. but I hear her clear as day.

I feel their stares but don't dare look back. I already know that my best friend prefers Corrine over me.