As im together with Chris Pine for the 3rd or 4th time being with him feels like he has some control of me but i know i enjoy being with him as much i love fucking him. Husband wise he's great but he overwhelming me with all this sex and popping these blue pills he better off using a penis pump but im tired of lying to myself so i want so express how i really feel that may require me to leave him again sometimes he can be an ass. Enough of me i know you all are tired of hearing about me not knowing what i want let me tell you some things going on with my family. My younger sister kielly went through a divorece she has one child by actor rome miller they been married for 4 years they got a divorece around 2012 or 2013 i feel for her i forgot the reason why they're not together something to do with infidelity and trust issues i just know after this divorece it turn my sisters on the wrong road made her take a unpleasant journey that would made me lead to her not forgiving her. Along this journey she did something that was out of her character i think ever since then she took a toll she completely lost her mind. Now me and Chris pine been at it basically trust issues too me desire Chris brown after him so i step out this time it wasn't my fault we missed each other in some way we end up having sex. i couldn't wait and soon as Chris pine heard or find out he did something spikeful get back at me he slept with my assistant and sister. Once he slept with my assistant because he's a fucking sex addict in general once he found out me and Chris brown were together moving in he knows my role having custody of the kids so he slept with kielly to proove a point then it turned into affair. I get that she divorce but none of this is okay.😒 i was disappointed, hurt betrayed angry with kielly most of all angry with myself once i find myself fighting and beating kielly ass from head to toe i can't believe my ex husband chris Pine got me fighting my own sister i didn't even see it was him controlling me im totally out of it. I was so out of it Chris brown help with my problem best thing he supported me throughout the whole thing i didn't realize who i was becoming until i found myself in rehab it was that bad i was in rehab for a month i completed my program and went to theray about my addiction it was simple my problems only occur when im together with Chris Pine almost neither of them healthy for me. Why i say that me and Chris brown are use to each other like nothing new some quality in are relationship has not change like i said always picks up where we left off only thing change is are communication and humanity for each other because now Chris brown has a babygirl. These 2 changes improved are relationship for the better i appreciate Chris brown being their for me but i feel like I'll never deserve him i always have the impression im bad for him it's not that we can't last im just always holding back this time i don't want to hurt him..?
My love life after rehab with Chris brown so far been healthy but Chris pine keep holding everything against me i can only tolerate him for so long as mother im holding up really well me and Chris brown had play dates and took care are kids like they are own. On the other hand I've been spikeful to Chris pine not letting him see the kids when i need to go to the Chris pine house to get their things sometimes i send some body get it for me but on my own conditions I'll retrieve rest of their things. I hate it but it something i gotta do. So one day i head over to his house plus i still have a key as i enter i walked on him fucking my sister kielly i was shocked when i saw the 2 together. Back my head im thinking i deserved it but at the same time he went too far Chris pine was really hitting below the belt so he wanted play dirty by getting back at me sleeping with my sister the one who closest to me well was. I was angry i had evry right to be took some time to forgive her but i wasn't about to forget about this even if he ask me to give him another chance. Im still pist how spikeful he turn out to be i flet like because my mistakes and descions i made i let it go too far but i didn't tell him sleep with my sister i was so carless with my actions i felt like i let this happened. It took me a while get over it as you can see but one thing for sure Chris brown help me get my head together therapy had help me because gain was i stable enough to deal with my problems on my own i know i got to be stable enough to face Chris pine one day sometimes i regret he the father of my kids nothing I can do about now. As im with Chris brown i try stay happy with with him and i remain angry with kielly still this affair with her and my ex husband made kielly evil brought out a side of me i did not like JEALOUSLY it made me a bit insecure. I try taking my mind off of it by working but i was doing the wrong thing not focusing on my kids enough then i got a wake up call from their father when he try to gain custody from the kids i thought with out me fighting he not gonna have full custody of my children. Gaining the kids is one thing gaining my trust and respect is another he would practically half to go to battle just get that shit back with me because of him i was turning into the bad guy i wanted to kill them both. I done everything i can to prevent him from getting the kids i fight back point out alligations about his self in the court i had my old assistant as witness she told her side of the story so once i did that judge decide give us joint custody due to are infidelity of are marriage plus we made are divorce official that day. I was mad but was greatful i still get to see my kids but i was so done with Chris Pine I'll probably still maybe have to work with him movie deals because are contract together have to co parent but im never talking to him again i just feel hella betrayed. He not the man he use to be he say one thing but mean another with him messing with my sister isnt gonna make are relationship any easier because of that made it hard for are relationship together but i realize that's her fault. Chris brown more then a father then Chris pine lately since he wants to screw my sister once i point that shit out he's not gonna like it i bet he will drop that affair sooner then kielly realize he used her i bet money on that shit any day. Everytime i see fucking kielly i get mad i know i can't hold a grudge forever but im like really uncomfortable with her i can forgive but this something i won't forget and will have a hard time moving on from this subject i try talk about it my family and rest my sister is aware of this. Because one day kielly came over at the family mansion while i catched up with everyone i completely black out i hit her we end up bamming because of it we had a family intervention anybody needs it it's kielly. soon as i shout that my father yelled at me one of sister address me i have a serious problem i already been acknowledge that i taken care of it i feel like my dad or anybody else is doubting me about myself that i fix my problem. I just felt awkward and mad at this stage i don't like being told what to do but my dad keeps me groundedand restricted apparently im not on my self that's why it came to this intervention im like lowkey ashamed in my actions but im trying slowly turn things around. As im together with Chris brown it truly better me in some way but we always trying pick where we left off sometimes im okay with ot but really we need a new chapter in are life having a kid together not gonna solve anything when i was Chris pine that use to solve everything for him. But their two different men i love one of them more than the other Chris brown we really just been getting close he been really needy lately we see each other everyday we can je being a little careful with me because he realize when were not together to much i likey to cheat on him but when were always together i feel like he smothering me but then we have crazy sex that makes it up. I like when were distance from each other makes us miss each other more sometimes when were doing shows or middle of a tour will have hot sex in are hotel rooms make love at his house the one i was moving into. I remember i was staying at Chris brown house his mom and aunt came by they were gossiping i over heard his mom saying i don't know why she moving in with my son she not gonna last long here or with him. I heard that by Chris brown mom i was hurt but i wanted to prove her wrong we stay together at leat almost a year we decide get engaged plans on tying the not until we were ready and situated just when were about get married i had go do a movie at the time he had go away on another tour with big Sean and ty dollar sign... i enjoy being with him when we were together enjoy his company but miss him like crazy when he off my mind while i had my other job that hold me occupied while i was doing movie it led to premier parties that linger me back to Zac effron..? (TO BE CONTINUED! )
