Reporting from Yours Truly

The Escort, Lunch, and Flying Book

There  is an unspoken rule in our school. Until the teacher dismisses you, do not move from where you are. Why? Because all of our teacher's are dangerous and probably know 100 ways to kill someone with a ruler. And a student was once karate kicked for insulting a teacher. (That was Ms.Janis by the way, just so you know.)  

And unfortunately (or fortunately, I don't know yet), the new guy, Jasper I think, just broke that golden rule of ours. I'm actually feeling sorry for him... 

"Where are you going?" Ms.Jane glared at him. 

"To my seat...?" He kind of asked. I think he's getting an idea of what's happening from the terrified looks on my classmate's faces. Ms.Jane glared harder, and he did the one thing no one but I did; he glared back. He glared back. I am the only one allowed to do that without getting karate kicked to the next classroom. 

Ms.Jane scowled, and he copied the motion. She was fuming now. Better get my popcorn. 

Jasper went to take his seat again, completely ignoring Ms.Jane, and I almost laughed at Ms.Jane's expression. Apparently she saw me trying not to and turned her wrath towards me.

"Andrew! You will be escorting the new student around the school." She huffed and sat down. Well, this can't be too bad. Who knows, he may be a prick, or a nerd, or even someone interesting enough to glare back at our teachers.

 Peter looked at me like I was going to flip out and murder everyone. 

"I'm just hoping he doesn't get you mad... I don't want to hear that you snapped and threw a chair in his face." Peter said.

"I'm not going to throw a chair in his face. Maybe a book, but not a chair. Chairs are too heavy." I smiled a bit. 

Jasper was looking confused, as he still didn't know who I was, seeing as Ms.Jane didn't point to me or anything. I raised my hand and spoke.

"I'm Andrew by the way." He nodded and sat down in the only empty seat. Which was a window seat. I chuckled, getting myself another glare from the demon teacher.

The rest of math went by quickly, and I then had to actually converse with Jasper. He surprised me though by coming to me first. 

"Hi." He looked nervous. Why would he be nervous? Half of the girls in our class were already in love with him, seeing as he opposed a teacher and is still alive.

"Hey. So, I guess the devil ordered me to show you around. Don't worry, I won't throw any chairs, books maybe, but no chairs."  Yep, that's me, the one with the messed up first impression.

"As long as you don't chuck a dictionary I think I'll be fine." Jasper smiled a bit. "But I never heard you rule out tables. Tables hurt. Don't throw a table. Or a Harry Potter book. Those are like dictionaries themselves." 

"I won't throw a table. And I assure I'm not lugging around dictionaries or Harry Potter books." I laughed. 

We started talking about what I could throw and that turned into a conversation about creative ways to kill people. Don't ask me how we got there, because I really don't know.

We had our next class together, which was chemistry, and we ended up as lab partners. Mr.Robinson was another teacher who didn't like me. Even though I actually didn't mind him.

We were doing some chemical mix up to see what we had to blow up. That went on until I was sent to the principle's office because I may or may not have singed off John's eyebrows.

After a talk about how much of a dick John is and how he smoked pot behind the school and how he did it with Margret in the school's locker rooms Mr.Jay shut me up. And John got detention for a week.

I hear all of the gossip, seeing as I sit between the makeup monsters, and I have become Mr.Jay's informant. Because I know everything, seriously. Do not underestimate me.  

When I walked out I found Jasper looking lost outside of the bathrooms. He spotted me and waved a bit.

"Sorry, was getting John detention and getting myself out of trouble." I apologized and realized that I probably missed the rest of science. That means it's lunch time!

"Dude, it's lunch. You have to eat our lunch." I looked him in the eyes, and said it really serious, and I probably creeped him out. I went towards the cafeteria 

"You are one freaky guy." He stated, but followed me anyways. 

Okay, I have to clear this up. I'm not trying to kill the poor lad by force feeding him that normal cafeteria poison someone pulled out their ass. I said OUR food. Which means Peter and I's  food. 

We sat down, and I pulled out my lunch, opened it, and let Jasper behold the perfectly put together and delicious looking lunch. Then I kindly shoved chunk of food into his mouth. 

"Mmph!"  He exclaimed, looking surprised. 

"I have another brother. He can cook like a food angel. Eat it, enjoy it." I smiled. 

"Oh my god. That was amazing. Do you eat this every day?" He looked amazed. I nodded, and took a bit of my food, tasting the familiar taste of wonderful food. 

"Andrew and Peter Black, please come to the office. Andrew and Peter Black, please come to the office." The announcement rang through the cafeteria. 

"Don't eat all of it, but you're welcome to have some. I'll be back in a minute." I know who that has to be. It's gotta be him.

Apparently Peter and I didn't get out of the lunch room fast enough and our summoner burst in.

"ANDREW  AND PETER BLACK, GET YOUR ASSES OVER HERE!" That would be our step-brother, Jared. He's 21, and we're living with him at the moment. And he's also the cook who makes our lunches from heaven. 

"Jared!" Peter was scared out of his skin. You see, in addition to Jared being an excellent cook, he also can kick butt, and he has kicked Peter's ass a few times for different reasons, and now Peter is just a bit scared of him.

"Peter, I'm not gonna kill you!" Jared said when Peter jumped as he dragged him to the office. Maybe I can just meld with the wall paper, or hide behind Jasper...

"Hey, can I hide behind you?" I asked him. He nodded, and took another bite of my lunch. 

"Who's that?" Jasper asked. 

"Well, that my friend, is who made the food you are eating and is the only perso alive that Peter is scared of, my step-brother, Jared." I answered, hiding as best I could. 

"And why are you hiding?" Jasper took another bite.

"Hey! Don't eat it all! Anyways, I'm hiding because the only possible reason that he's here is that he has to go somewhere and he's gonna dump off Conner and force us to take care of him. If that happens, I'll expect you to be at my funeral, telling everyone about how cool I am." I sighed. Conner was actually awesome but we're in school, and it doesn't matter how buddy-buddy I am with Mr.Jay, he won't let us have a twelve year old follow us around. 

Jared and Conner are our step-brothers. Their last name is Cooke. Their Mom married our Dad so, yeah. That was when Peter and I were, what, 5? Yeah, because Conner had just been born, right before dad met her... and they got married when we were around 7. 

"Wait a second... ANDREW!! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?" He finally noticed. 

"He's over here!" Jasper yelled out.

"You traitorous bastard!" Shit, I'm starting to swear. Don't swear Andrew, don't swear. You'll corrupt Conner. Yeah right, he lives with Jared, who swears once every sentence really. I get a book form my back pack.

I hear foot steps and the next thing I know I'm being dragged out of the cafeteria, leaving my lunch from heaven to a smiling Jasper, who I throw a book I took at. 

"It's not Harry Potter or a dictionary, it's Percy Jackson!" I yelled at him as it hits him in the stomach, seeing as he got up to even wave at me as I was dragged. I'll get the book back later.

Now, let's see what awaits me.