Broken Angel

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

The ocean was my first thought. Everything reminded me of it. The white – hinted with grey – walls reminded me of the foam from the waves crashing. The light wooden floor reminded me of the golden sands. The turquoise coloured doors on my wardrobe, and the turquoise coloured curtains, bed covers, rug and other little knick-knacks reminded me of the ocean on a calm summer day.

I sunk on to the bed and looked around with my tear-filled eyes. A photo of a family who were smiling happily in a park on a sunny day was standing inside a silver photo frame on the bedside table. My head started to hurt as if something inside it was going “knock, knock. Let me out.”

‘Ryvre, can I talk to you?’ Ace asked sitting next to me on the bed. ‘I don’t want to upset you...’

‘Upset me how?’ I turned to look at him.

‘Well, it’s just...’ Ace swallowed, ‘I think Scotia and Seth might be black-soul angels.’

‘You “think”?’ I repeated defensively. ‘And what makes you “think” that idea?’

‘Well, for starters, you don’t know what powers they have.’ Ace pointed out.

‘Maybe they don’t want to tell me until I’m not a broken angel – it could be dangerous,’ I was trying to find possible reasons why, ‘ever thought about that?’ I jumped to my feet and began pacing the room.

‘Okay... But what about the fact you didn’t know about the white-soul dynasty; they should have told you.’ Ace looked uncomfortable.

‘They didn’t tell me about the black-soul dynasty either,’ I found a point to argue, ‘maybe they were doing it for my safety?’ Ignorance is bliss, as they say. I became angry at the thought that Ace could have ruined Seth and Scotia’s plan to keep me safe. ‘How do I know you haven’t put me in danger? I was fine until you showed up.’

I didn’t mean it. I was just angry at him... at myself... the idea of Scotia and Seth being black-souls... everything. All of it was too overwhelming – the bedroom; the dynasty; my powers; my family... possibly Ace.

‘Ryvre, do you honestly think I’d put you in danger?’ Ace tried to keep the offence he felt out of his tone. ‘I want to keep you away from it.’

‘Honestly? I don’t know anymore.’ I admitted to him.

‘I’m just saying isn’t it a possibility that Scotia and Seth are black-souls and this whole thing is a trap?’ Ace asked as he stood up, and then he put his hands on my shoulders.

‘It’s possible but it’s not true.’ I moved away from his touch, knowing how it can melt me. ‘I refuse to believe that the people who raised me are evil.’

‘I know it’s hard to hear but surely you understand why I think they might be.’ Ace looked hurt.

Tears began to fall down my face. Ace was saying what I had been arguing with myself about for years. I scrubbed at my eyes as Ace wrapped his arms around me. ‘No, Ace.’ I broke free from his grip. ‘You can’t make it all go away with a hug.’ Although it helps make things better a little.

‘Ryvre, I know that you want to-’ Ace started to say.

‘What I want?’ I cut him off. ‘You don’t know what I want.’ I know I sounded selfish but I couldn’t help myself. ‘No one’s even asked me what I want.’

‘Well... what do you want?’

“You” is what I desperately wanted to say. ‘I didn’t want all... this,’ I gesture to the whole room, ‘I never wanted to be a part of a dynasty. No one asked me if I wanted to know my real family. I never wanted to have my powers, let alone develop them.’ That scared me, having power. ‘No one asked if I wanted to join my twin-soul – I never even believed in it. No one even asked if I wanted to be an angel...’ I used my hands to emphasize what I said next, ‘see-’

Ace cut me off by grasping my arm, below my wrist. ‘Ryvre, I loved – love – you and not because of the twin-soul connection. I love you because you are everything to me.’

I didn’t want to hear it. All my life I’ve never needed anyone... so I told him, ‘Ace, I don’t need anyone.’ The hand wrapped around my arm was hot. ‘I can handle it myself.’

‘No, you can’t,’ Ace said angrily, ‘admit it: you need someone... Say you need me.’ His eyes were begging me to say it.

‘Ace, please,’ the hand began to burn my arm, ‘let me go. You’re hurting me!’ I pulled away – hard – and Ace looked shocked at the burn mark on my arm.

‘Ryvre,’ Ace gasped, ‘I’m so sorry!’ Ace took a step towards me and I flinched back. ‘At least let me take away the pain.’

‘Don’t touch me.’ I demanded, clutching my arm.

‘Don’t be stupid.’ Ace rubbed his face.

‘Oh, so now you’re insulting me.’ I laughed, hysteria bubbling. ‘Great, you know what Ace?’ He stared at me, his eyes filled with hurt, concern and worry. ‘I’m going to do the “smart” thing and walking away.’

‘Ryvre, don’t go. I’m sorry.’ Ace’s eyes were red-rimmed and sparkling as he sunk to his knees. The calm ocean tone of the room turned into a storm. ‘You mean everything to me!’

I bent do to his level and placed my lips next to his ear. ‘You...’ I licked my lips and sucked in a deep breath, ‘you mean nothing to me.’ It was a total lie. I needed him like I need oxygen.

‘You don’t mean that,’ Ace whispered in a small, choked voice, ‘of course you don’t mean that.’

‘Don’t worry; I won’t talk to you ever again. I won’t come back to the dynasty ever again and... I won’t be an angel anymore.’ I turned on my heels and walked out the room. When I was out of sight, I ran down the stairs and reached the hallway, bumping into Talia. ‘Oh, sorry Talia,’ I wiped away my tears, ‘oh and sorry about what I said at the party. I was, you know... out of my head – I wasn’t thinking.’

‘Hey, do you know what? Don’t worry about it.’ She smiled sweetly. ‘You actually did me a favour.’

‘I did?’

‘Yeah, you did. I didn’t have to tell him myself, and that made it easier.’ Talia’s smile faded a little. ‘Are you alright?’

‘Yeah... it’s just allergies.’ I used the oldest excuse in the book. ‘I’ve got to go now but maybe we could catch up sometime?’

‘That’d rock.’ Talia forced her smile to become brighter again. ‘Okay... well, see you.’

My arm was stinging but my heart was where the pain hurt the most. My chest was a dark, empty pit. I knew that I had to go to the hospital and sort out my burn – I couldn’t let Scotia or Seth see that I had it and I certainly didn’t want Ace to heal it for me.

Ryvre, Ace stumped me, please, don’t go. I’m so sorry.

“Sorry” doesn’t have a meaning anymore. I didn’t answer him. I couldn’t – I didn’t want to go back to him. It’s dolorous when you have to go through something and act like you’re not bothered by it, but inside it absolutely kills you.  I walked to the nearest bus stop and dug through my pocket to find my spare change; then I hopped on the first bus that could take me to the hospital. Sitting on the bus, I looked around at everyone else. There was an old woman holding on to her shopping trolley with a smile playing at her lips. There was a group of girls were texting and giggling in the corner of the bus, trying to get the group of boys’ attention. The boys were checking out the girls and texting and listening to music. There was a young woman with a baby, trying to stop the buggy from rolling forwards; there was a little girl with her granddad; a teenage boy listening to his IPod, looking out the window. Some of the people on the bus could be like me: adopted or heartbroken. Some could even be angels. Some could be gangsters with a rough life. Some could be on the way to visit a sick loved one. Some could be on the way to the start of their life - like a job interview. Some could be coming home for dinner with a proper family. Some could be on their way to find out some good news... Others could be on their way to find out some bad news. The point is: you can never know how much someone is truly hurting. You could stand next to a person and not even acknowledge that they are just completely broken.