TSZ Magazine: July 2016 (Issue #2)

Fighting to Survive

by Shadows (@shadowswithinus)

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

At least that's what we're taught to believe. To some, this is a more of a metaphorical statement – one that claims that you will get through the hard times, and the struggles, and what doesn't bring you down, will effectively build you up.

But to others, this signature phrase takes on a more literal, deadly form.

When you see the people who live their lives wondering why they're so worthless, strength is hardly the thing you'd expect. For those who ponder every day whether anyone would care if they suddenly left, for those who are brave enough to stare death in the face and converse with it as though it were a long-lost friend, for those who struggle every day with suicidal thoughts and actions, they take these words at face value.

"I just really wanted to stop... altogether, all of that." an anonymous source (who chooses to simply be called M) said about living with suicidal thoughts in the midst of everything going on in her life. She had struggled (and is still struggling) with self-worth, self-confidence, and constant, household fighting. Luckily for M, "it was more of the thoughts than the actions."

We asked M how bad she really felt the thoughts had become, she made a raspberry noise at her frustration and self-reflection, simply replying, "Not good..."

Upon asking M what she might say to a friend that was going through the same problems, she made this statement: "I'd probably want to get through it together with them so we could both get through the situation. You know... understand each other."

According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, suicide is the tenth leading cause of death in the U.S. alone and cause 1.8% of deaths worldwide. It may also be worthy to note that, for the past 45 years, suicide has risen 60%.

So whether you've struggled with compulsive thoughts about taking your own life, or have already made multiple attempts, you should never think your feelings are not valid. You are not the only one going through these things, and even when no one seems to understand, remember that someone – at least one other person in the world – does.

And those of us who are suicidal or have been, sympathize with all going through the same issues.

If someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts and/or actions, please don't turn away, mock, scorn, or leave them. They are entrusting you with a piece of themselves and are asking for someone to understand what they are going through. No, it's not the easiest issue to deal with, and we all say things we shouldn't sometimes, but it doesn't mean we aren't here for each other. We are human, and you are too.Please remember that.

****If someone needs it, please find help, contact the National Suicide Prevention Line (they even have an online chat; U.S. line), or the International Suicide Hotlines at Suicide.org. Don't hesitate when help is needed and there is something you can do about it.