Maybe He Gives Me More

Same Old

                             Harry POV
   I grab his member and drop down to my knees, and start the routine. He brushes his hands through my hair and I can't remember what he said his name was but I continue sucking anyways because that's what you're supposed to do. I lick base to tip and twirl my tongue and I've done this so many times I don't even have to think about it. "Harry oh my god" he moans thrusting deeper into my throat and I can feel my nose graze his stomach. I focus on how the skin to skin feels.
     And I know what you're thinking, "he must have no self respect". And on that, you are completely right. I am constantly searching for ways to destroy myself because there isn't much anyone can do, I'm too far gone.
     I bob my head faster and faster and his breath speeds up and he tugs harder at my greasy hair. "I'm close" he shouts a little too loud and dramatically and soon enough I feel his seed dripping down my throat. I swallow without any complaint. I always feel accomplished, making people orgasm. Because yes, maybe I'm not good at school, work or sports, but my god do I know how to make people orgasm. It's the only thing I know how to do. The only thing I'm good at, besides fucking up.
    He zipped up his pants and yanked back his tie dye shirt over his head. I could still taste his dick in my mouth but I didn't say anything. A certain silence fills the room and I could almost automatically know what would happen next. He gave me a small smile and nod and whispered a small breathless "Don't tell anybody." And he walked out of my room without another word. I'll see him in school tomorrow and he'll look at me a little too long and walk a bit faster when he takes the same hallway route as me.
    As soon as I heard the soft click of the front door closing, I retreated to laying on my bed and grabbed my fuck list. Dehumanizing, I know. I'm on my 34th sex encounter this month. Thirty four times I've let a stranger in my mouth just to prove something. To whom? Some would think my deadbeat father, others would think to my ex boyfriend Niall.
     There comes a point where it doesn't really matter why you do the things you do. It just happens and that's who you are. Blowjobs and subtle hallway glances is who I am and that's the way life is sometimes. Unfair. Daunting. Whatever.