NO OTHER

Chapter 16 - Tears

Ruai POV

After the dinner everyone has its own role to play, the maknaes were assigned to clean the table and washed the dishes while their hyungs are resting and watching a football match, and those whose into games were assigned to play with SM. It’s almost midnight but SM doesn’t have any plan to sleep yet. He is totally enjoying the company of SUJU.

Me and Sungmin went up to the rooftop.

“ahh…ahheemmm…Ruai…?”

“hhmmm…?” I said while I'm looking at the sky.

“Thank you…for everything, for giving me this chance.” 

“Sungminah, have you ever stared and talked with those stars?" I took a deep breath and continued, "You know,when you left me, they were my companions at night as I shed my endless tears. Have you noticed that they are apart with each other, but still they managed to shine. As I watches them everynight,  I always wanted to be like them, to shine again even without you and gladly I did." Again I took a  really deep breath and continued to tell him how I hated him, "There were days that I'm too angry to the point that I can kill you with my bare hands. I want to slit your throat or break your limbs, all of those for leaving me that day.  When SM came, I am so happy and I felt so blessed. My family really adores him and I'm so thankful for them. As time passess, I'm gradually learning how to stand and shine again. I am happy and contented living my life with my son and my family that I thought I had forgoten you, so i thought. When I saw you that day, time froze and I was transported to that day again when I learned from the bellboy that your gone, everything came back. It is too vivid that I thought it happened only yesterday." I said while crying silently as the memory keep on flashing back.

I never attempt  to look at his side even I heard his crack voice.

"I'm  so..so...sorry..."

I continued talking pretending not to hear him, "I'm doing all of these for my son coz I don't want him to grow up without knowing his father. Let us put aside our personal sentiments and give all our attentions to him, espcially now that his growing up and his longing for your affection. I just hope you will do your part marvelously."

There was an awkward silence then I heard him saying...

 "Ok...I will."

"Good...now are we done talking?"

"Not yet honey... since you do all the talking, will you allow me to present my side?" he said teasingly.

I glanced at his side and raised my eyebrow as I heard him using that endearment again.

"Ok..." now it's my time to listen to him. I'm ready to listen to him but minutes had passed but he's still never said anything. I sat there quitely and waited for him to talk. 

"aahhmm...ahheerrmm..." he said trying to clear his throat. I never imagined him to be like this. He, Lee Sungmin of Super Junior whose always wearing those cuteness in front of cameras and fans suddenly become serious? No marks of any aegyo nor smile...

“I’m sorry, I’m really, really sorry for leaving you that day.  It’s just that something terribly happened and I need to go back at that very moment but believe me I looked for you but the person I hired said you already left and he cannot found you .I’m sorry if I gave you so much pain, for not being with you all through out. I’m sorry for everything Ruai…He said it emotionally while looking at me intently.

 I'm almost drowned by those foxy eyes of his but thankfully i gained my sanity. I mastered all my strenght and act coldly.

"Are you done? Oh, before I forgot...If you're in a relationship right now please tell your partner not to get involve in any SM business. I am his mother and no other else, and tell your damn agency to lift that ban they had for both SM and me. You know very well that he needs to go back after this vacation."

"Huh...?! What ban...? but, I'm not into a relationship..." he said puzzled

"Really...?! You don't know that your company filed a travel ban for us? Do you expect me to believe that?  Leetuek Oppa told me awhile ago before you arrived."

"Huh..Teukie Hyung...? Ani..., maybe they are making sure that you will not run away....but..."

"What...?! running away...? How dare you...!!!" Out of anger I slap him. "Why are you so cruel to me?! You don’t have any idea what I’ve been through for you to make such cruel moves just to make sure that I will not be running away. Do you really guys thought that I…that I… will runaway and I will take SM away from you, huh…? I told you the moment we saw each other that you can stand as SM’s father, right…? I didn’t even deny that he is not your child but how could you do this me, huh…?! ”Please…please...stop destroying my life!!!  I cried helplessly in front of him. When it comes to him, I am so weak and helpless.

“Ruai… I’m not destroying your life! Aissshhh…! He said almost shouting.

“Don’t shout at me! You don’t have even a slim right to shout at me!!! You jerk!!! Do you know how I’d suffered when I almost lost my son, huh? You’re supposedly on my side during those time but, where are you ha…?! You said, you did look for me but when…?! Where...?!

“Ruai….!” He was shocked by my revelation. I don't have any intentions to let him know but I am too angry and hysterical that I didn't know what I'm talking about. I felt that he hugged me tightly but I keep on waggling.  

“Hon, I’m sorry…I’m very sorry…please…stop it…ssshhh…ssshhh…!” He said trying to calm me down. I am too emotional to comprehend what he is saying. 

Suddenly I heard my friend voice.

"Let me go...you jerk! Let me go..." I said while I keep on punching his chest.

"Bes, are you ok...? Sungminah...please...?" my friend said gesturing to him to let me go...

"but..." he said hesitantly

"It's ok, she will be fine. " Ros said to him. and she helps me to sit.

He is sadly looking at me as my friend help me to settle on a chair. Then Ros went inside the house to get some water. He's slowly walking towards me and squatted infront me.

"Hon, I'm sorry that you suffered that much because of me...I'm sorry..." he said teary-eyed and hug me again. I don't have any strength to avoid his arms so I let him hug me as I continue crying.

“Bes, uminom ka muna oh…” habang inanalayan ito paupo sa silya.

“Thank you Bes… can you tell them to leave.” Sabi nito habang hindi tumitingin kay Sungmin.

“Im sorry…Sungminah, but you need to leave.”

Parang ayaw pa nito umalis pero wala din itong choice.

Ros approached Leeteuk and said,

“Baby, please…take Sungminsshi to your dorm. I’m sorry for what happened…maybe she will call him tomorrow after she will calm herself.”

“Are you sure…?” Tanong ni Leetuek na nag alala na rin.

“Yup, she will be fine. Don’t worry. Just look after Sungmin. I know he knew everything and I’m pretty sure his not alright at all.”

“OK, then we’ll go ahead. Goodnight. Anyway SM now is sleeping. Just call me if you need some help, ok?”

Tumango lang ito at bumalik na ulit sa tabi ni Ruai na patuloy pa rin sa pag iyak.