social outcast

Ch. 3

     I was ready to tell Chris why I was at the therapy building.

     " OkAy this is really hard but..... I am anorexic. I have hated my body and I am really sick. I almost died just 9 months ago shortly after we were kicked out of our house for not paying rent. my family has been moving around to different apartments and I have a terrible home life. My dad drinks and my mother is always depressed too. I have no friends and I get bullied everyday for not being 'good enough'  and I've started to believe it. so I take therapy lessons so try and get me to feel better but it doesn't do shit for me."

     I couldn't believe I just said all that. so much for keeping to myself. I felt a connection between us and felt like we were close already and that I could trust him. there was a long deadly pause. so deadly that I wanted to die. he just sat there, eyes wide. he started to tear up which made me start bawling. he got up out of his chair to come hug me. we stood in the middle of the library Just holding each other for the longest time.

     when we left the library I felt like we had just bonded and now had an even stronger connection.

     I decided to take off the rest of the school day and go home to rest. I couldn't handle the pain and the confusion of my chemistry class next period would make my mind go crazy.

     I ate some cheese and crackers and forced myself to keep it into my stomach. I take pills to make me more hungry so that I will give in to Not wanting to eat. sometimes it works but.other time it makes me feel worse.

     my parents weren't home. I texted by mom and asked where she was. she responded saying:

your dad got caught duy. at jail trying to bail out. I'll be home shortly

    I was scared. all I did was turn off my phone and took a cold shower and then took a long cat nap. when I woke and turned on my phone, I had another text.