Plan B

Chapter Three

As the cab pulled up in front of the bar, I thought about that afternoon again and the way I felt when Daytonne looked at me. Maybe she was attracted to me. But it was of no consequence if she was.

The three of us jumped out, buzzed with excitement. It was my first time in a dyke bar and all my reference points were literary.  For a women's study course, I had read some of the lesbian pulp fiction novels of the 1950's and 60's.  The bars in these books were always dark places hidden in basements of derelict buildings. The women in these books were dressed along strict gender lines, as either a man of the day would dress, or completely doll'd up. I didn't imagine that was what bars were like now. I looked at Jane in her Ani Difranco t-shirt and striped leggings. No, definitely not.

I scanned the main floor of the club and felt silly for my musings on the way over. The Daisy was like any other modern club. Bright lights, loud music, a stone faced bouncer at the front door. Many of the women were wearing jeans, tank tops or t-shirts; some had short, cropped hair, and rings lining their ears.  The obvious difference was the absence of men. Did I feel like something was lacking? I wasn't sure. Jane grabbed my arm. She had three shots in her hand and handed me one. 'On the count of three!'

Three shots later, Jane, Franca, and I headed to the dance floor. We were tipsy enough to feel uninhibited but not yet sloppy drunk. We were dancing together in a circle to the beat of Madonna's  'Vogue'. I have always loved to dance, and in those moments on the dance floor, with my best friends, and the zing of alcohol in my veins, I felt the satisfaction of the self possession that had eluded me for too long. A half-hour or so went by on that dance floor before Franca called out 'Who is buying the next round?' I offered to go, thinking I better get some water in me to avoid a hangover. The bar was crowded as I expected, and I settled in behind a row of women in front of me.

'Hey, Juliette'. My heart kicked. I felt a soft squeeze of my elbow and turned around. 'Hi Daytonne'. There she stood, at least a good foot above me.  The impression of her height was also a credit to her posture. I wondered if she had taken ballet or maybe horse back riding. I certainly couldn't imagine Daytonne succumbing to anything that would put her in a pink leotard and tights. I didn't know what to say next and Daytonne seemed content to just look at me as if there wasn't a black hole of conversation between us.

'I didn't know you were here', I eventually offered. It felt like an obvious thing to say but it was all I could come up with.

'hmm. You were dancing.'

'You saw me?' (she already told you that, stupid)

'Yes, I saw you.' This she said with a penetrating blue eyed gaze. My face warmed.

I wondered if she was making fun of my dancing. 'Well, I was really into the music and - '

'I could tell'.

'What can I get you?' I whipped my head over to the bartender. '3 Gin and Tonics please'. I turned back to Daytonne. 'They aren't all for me.'

'Generous of you'.

Was she ever going to say more than a three word sentence? Was she enjoying my obvious discomfort?

We looked at eachother and I wondered if one of us would actually say something else or if I should just go back to my friends. I didn't even know why I was still standing there. I felt awkward, and nervous, but also a thrill was tickling my nerves that made me stay put.

She broke the silence. 'Why are you here tonight?'

I figured she knew I wasn't a regular, that I wasn't here with the same 'credentials' as the other women.  Maybe she was questioning my legitimacy in coming.

'I, um, came with Jane and Franca'. I felt somewhat offended by what I thought she was insinuating so I fired back 'I could ask you the same question. Why are you here?'

Daytonne chuckled with her lips closed. Then she looked into my eyes like she was travelling right through me.

'Actually, I come here every now and then but tonight I was hoping that your friends might bring you.'

The bartender was back now. She placed the drinks on the counter and I put the money in her hands.

I was in a state of some disbelief. Did she just imply she was here to see me? I was sure I was blushing and I felt another wave of heat move through me. To Daytonne, I didn't know what to say so I said nothing. Hanging onto the drinks, I turned into the crowd and let it swallow me up, looking up to give her a small nod in the direction of my friends to indicate I needed to head back. I don't know what Daytonne did because I didn't look back.

Jane grabbed me as soon as she and Franca had their drinks in hand. 'Was that Daytonne you were talking to? Juliette, is something going on?' I told her that by coincidence we were in line together and kept eachother company while we waited. I wasn't lying.  If I was omitting Daytonne flirting with me, it was for my own sake.

to be continued...