𝐌𝐘 𝐀𝐒𝐘𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐊 ☆ Death the Kid x Reader

14

"Well, here we are," I muttered while unlocking the door to my house, pulling it open slowly. An eerie silence awaited me, reminding me that both my sister and my best friend would be living with other people for the time being.

God bless their souls.

"Are you just gonna stand there?" Soul asked as he lightly shoved me through the door frame, breaking me of my thoughts. "Nice place by the way."

"Yea, it's not like it's your first time coming here," I said, walking over and plopping down on the comfy tan sofa in the living room. Soul came and sat next to me, a little too closely in my opinion.

"Oh, yeah, I thought it seemed familiar. Why did I come here before again?"

"To do the dirty with my sister most likely," I shrugged, grabbing the small remote to my television off the coffee table and pressing the small red button. The TV flashed to life with one of my favorite animes, Tokyo Ghoul.

"Y'mean blue stripes? Why the hell would I fuck he-," he began, interrupted by my cry towards the television.

"Kaneki, why?! N-no, don't- oh my god and Hide, no!" Yes, this wasn't my first time watching the last episode of Root A, Ken, yet it was just as sad as watching it the first time.

"What the-," Soul started, only for me to cover his mouth with my hand. I began to sing, well, screech out the lyrics to Unravel as they played onscreen, Kaneki carrying Hide's 'sleeping' form through the icy winter snow. Soul gave a look of discomfort before snatching the remote and turning off the TV.

"Yea, let's not do that. So not cool," the albino muttered while looking off to the side, him pulling his phone out of his inky black pocket. His fingers rapidly swept across the keys as his phone seemingly blew up with messages, it vibrating every other second. "Now what were you saying about me and your sister? Who is this girl? I'm assuming it's not blue stripes."

"Um, Sadie? My twin? Holy shit did she really not tell you that we're twins?!" In all honesty, I really wasn't that surprised. Soul, on the other hand, had his eyes as wide as saucers for the second time today.

"Y-you two are twins?"

"That's what I just said," I rolled my eyes as Soul just stared at me blankly.

"Are you fraternal twins? You look nothing alike."

"No, we're identical. The magic of makeup, am I right?" I sighed in annoyance. 'Of course, Sadie is always the topic at hand. She's not even in the room for fucks sakes!'

"Well, I guess that's good to know. The reason I didn't notice you before is because you're kinda invisible."

"Nah, you were just too busy being a man-whore."

"Fair enough." After Soul's small comment he pressed the red button on the remote once more, quickly changing the channel before I could cry over Kaneki again. "Go make me food, woman."

"Who the hell do you think you are? Make your own damned food!" I squealed, flailing my arms around in the air. My arms froze when I heard singing ring from the television, my eyes growing half an inch.

"What the hell!? Ew, I'm not watching this," Soul muttered, reaching for the button to change the channel. Before he could, however, I swiped the remote out of his hands and held it close to my chest, my eyes twinkling while I stared at the screen. The song playing was the classic "Tale as Old as Time" from Beauty and the Beast, possibly the best Disney flick out there.

The small white teapot known as Mrs. Potts sang as Bell and the beast danced, all the other objects around them fangirling that their ship had finally become cannon. I squealed and sang with Mrs. Potts in a much more delicate voice than when I was screeching Unravel, Soul staring at me in awe as I closed my eyes in content. When it finally got to the main chorus I sang the words as loud and as pretty as I could muster,

"Beauty and the-,"

"Scythey boy!" an overly-feminine voice cried, interrupting my glorious singing. I opened my e/c eyes to see a busty, barely dressed cat-girl sitting on Soul's lap, her pale arms wrapped around his neck tightly.

"What the-," I began, forgetting all about her rude interruption.

"B-Blair?!" Soul cried out, some blood dribbling out of his nose as his mouth hung open in shock. "W-what the hell are you doing here?" The cat-girl answered and told Soul all about how much she missed him, never once deciding to get up off of his lap. Without realizing, anger fumed inside me, anger due to the fact that he's cheating on my sister with this bimbo. Yea, my sister may be a bitch, but I still have an instinct to protect her.

"So, Soul, who's the fling?" I asked, nodding in the purple-haired girl's direction. A harsh glare took over my features, Soul shivering and gulping in response.

"Hello, lady~!" Blair cried out, running over to me and smothering me in her boobs. "My name's Blair! I'm Soulie's cat!"

'Oh, so she's not a fling, she's just delusional.'

"Blair, get out," Soul muttered, wiping the blood from his nose on his sleeve. He looked extremely uncomfortable in her presence, what a shame.

"No, you can stay!" I said with an overly sweet tone lacing my words, "I was about to go make Soul here some food, do you want some?"

"Fish please~!" Blair squealed, running over and settling herself on Soul's lap again afterward. Soul looked at me with wide crimson eyes, a smirk enveloping my lips.

'Time for a little revenge on popular scum,' I thought, making my way into the kitchen. 'This is what you get, Soul, for calling me invisible and treating me like I'm less than you.'

I ran over to the fridge and took out two jars, one filled with chunky peanut butter while the other was filled with grape jelly. I set them both on my granite countertop and then began making my way over to the pantry. I scoured the small space for the most disgusting ingredient I could find, my eyes landing on sardines. My smirk widened as I picked it off the shelf and placed it next to the other ingredients. I pulled out a huge bag of sugar and a package of moldy bread as well.

"Alright! Time for Chef y/n to strut her stuff!" I exclaimed, rummaging through my wooden drawers until I found what I was looking for. I took out the blue rubber gloves and safety goggles that I had found, quickly sliding them on and beginning to create my concoction. Untying the bag of moldy bread, I quickly took out two slices and threw them in the toaster, pulling them out when I heard the 'ding'.

I set the blackened pieces of bread side-by-side on the table, moving the jars of peanut butter and jelly closer to me. I paused my cooking to rummage through my drawers yet again, pulling out a glistening silver butter knife and setting it on the table.

"Oi! How's the food coming?!" Soul's deep voice boomed through the house. I opened my jars of peanut butter and jelly quickly, getting the message that he was beginning to get impatient.

"Almost done!" I replied in the sweetest tone I could muster, a low grumble and some profanity escaping my lips after. I stuck my knife harshly in the glass jar of jelly, spreading it sloppily on the burnt bread. After doing the same with the peanut butter a laugh escaped my lips. 'And now for the best part!'

I pulled the tab on the can of sardines back, the stench of the fish wafting through the air. I placed a few of them on the sandwich, covering them in sugar after I was done. I took off my cooking equipment and shoved the two pieces of bread together, throwing them onto a small red plate and grabbing the can of the remaining sardines before walking into the living room.

"Oooh~ sardines! Yummy!" Blair squealed, taking the can from my hand and scarfing them down. I set the normal-looking sandwich down in front of Soul, him giving a look of disgust anyway.

"Why is the bread black?"

"Don't be racist against bread, jerk," I said while flicking my hand forward repeatedly, motioning for him to just eat his sandwich.

"You took so damn long to just make a PB&J sandwich, nobody is ever gonna marry you if you can't cook," Soul sneered, picking up and taking a bite out of the sandwich. A look of disgust quickly swept over his chiseled features, him spitting the sandwich out with tears streaking his cheeks.

"Sorry, I wasn't really looking to impress." Blair laughed her ass off at Soul's failed attempt to get the taste out of his mouth while I just stood with a smirk on my face. "Never call me or Evelyn a loser again."

"Done!"