supposed innocence

3

I walked into my house throwing my bag on the bench next to the door. walking straight to the fridge and grabbing a water.

I drank some of the ice cold liquid feeling it invade my insides. I rested my elbows on the counter, my head in my hands.

all day long I was being questioned and watched, being glared at and getting winks thrown my way.

I absolutely hated it. it made my head spin and now I'm fighting a migraine.

"hey honey, I didn't hear you come in." my mom spoke walking into the kitchen "do you have another one of your headaches?" she asked concerned.

I nodded in reply. "ok, go lay down on the couch. ill get your medicine and fix you something to eat." she directed.

I curled into a ball on the couch as I heard my mom cooking, and going through the medicine cabinet.

I always get these headaches when I am about to have an anxiety attack, sometimes the medicines helps to not have one, but rarely it doesn't depending on the level of anxiety.

social anxiety is what my dad calls it, my mom says I just don't like attention, that I'll grow out of it.

my mom appears in the living room with a tray of food as she sits on the couch beside me "up up." she instructs I slowly get up to a normal sitting position.

she hands me two pills and a glass of water, I take them. "eat, then go to sleep." she kisses my head softly getting up to leave.

"mom?" I call out she turns back around "I have a date tonight. with Nate at 7." I mumbled

she looked surprised "are you sure you want to go?" she questioned I shrugged, "I don't want to bale on him." I admitted she nodded before speaking.

"don't tell your dad, he would be furious. just be back by 9." she left the room shortly after.

I finished eating as I went up stairs seeing the clock flashing 5:00.

I pulled on some fitted jeans and a light cream sweater and fell on to the bed falling asleep slowly after.

••••••••••

"Lillie!" I heard through my door making me jolt awake. the clock now read 7:05. I ran to the door my mom was shaking her head "he is downstairs, did you fall asleep?"

I nodded "my head wouldn't stop hurting, sorry." I softly spoke quickly walking down the stairs pulling my long dark hair over my shoulder.

my eyes landed on Nate as he wore all black with grey vans, and a crimson beanie.

"hello Lillie." he smiled, I did a small wave in reply. "I'll have her back by 9 Ms.Hale." my mom smiled and nodded as we exited the house.

"I thought I said don't keep me waiting Lillie." Nate spoke in my ear making me step away from him. "where you asleep?" he questioned

I nodded "my head hurt." I simply put "sorry." I mumbled pulling at my sleeves.

"it's fine Lillie, I was kidding. are you feeling better now?" he asked I nodded again a small smile on my lips. "good." he smiled back.

he lead me to his car opening the door letting me slid in. he joined me, swiftly pulling out of the drive way.

"so your dad was cool with me taking you out?" Nate questioned glancing to me then back to the road.

I shook my head "uh he doesn't know, me and my mom thought it would be best to wait and see how-um-er-you know." I stammered knowing it wouldn't be polite to say 'to see if I actually like you or if you're worth the trouble'

"to see if I'm worth the trouble?" Nate questioned hurt flashing through his eyes quickly. did I say that out loud? "I really hope you don't base you opinion of me off of the rumors of others."

"I'm here aren't I?" I questioned sharply. "if I was going to base my opinion off of what others thought I wouldn't be, because all day all I have gotten is how you're going to use me. but I'm too nice to just bale on you, so I came anyways" I paused "I'm giving you a chance."

"no one ever does that." he spoke shocked "does what?"

"y'know, actually give me a chance. they just label me as the bad boy." he is looking directly at the road "thanks." he simply added

we pulled up to the towns arcade, my stomach turned seeing all of the cars parked, meaning there was a lot of people here.

I swallowed harshly as my door opened revealing a smiling Nate. I slid out of the car my feet hitting the ground with a thud.

he lead us to the entrance as I saw the dozens of people, my heart started beating faster. I gripped Nate's arm pulling him back.

"c-could we go some-w-where it's less crowded?" I asked softly he looked around before looking back at me. "of course, do you want to get some ice cream then go to the park? I think it's pretty much abandoned this time of night."

I nodded he smiled "this way." he stretched his arms towards the small ice cream parlor across the street. I started walking towards the cross walk "can I hold your hand, it's for my peace of mind." Nate asked.

I looked down at his hands then mine nervously, his were much bigger than mine. "su-ure." his hand softly grasped mine as the sign told us we could walk.

the ice cream parlor was semi crowed not as much as the arcade, but still not empty.

"I'll go in, you can wait out here." Nate began "is that ok?" I nodded simply sitting on the bench.

"stay right here please." I nodded once again he smiled walking into the parlor.

I started fiddling with the holes in my jeans when I felt someone sitting beside me. I turned my gaze meeting a very tan built boy with blonde hair.

"hello beautiful." he winked

"uh hi?" I spoke glancing at him then back at my jeans hoping he would get the hint that I didn't want to talk to him.

"are you here alone?" he questioned I shook my head in reply. "it sure does seem like it." he continued

"my friend is inside." I imputed quickly he nodded looking into the window of the ice cream parlor.

"I'll keep you company." he grinned toothy. his arm wrapped around me making me scoot away, but his grip was too tight.

"stop." I softly spoke trying to move away again "let go." I tried to move his arm off of me.

"I would highly advise you to get your arm off of her before I break it." I heard a raspy familiar voice.

I turned to find an angry looking Nate holding two ice cream cones.

the boys arm was off of me in a second, "sorry Nate I thought you where done with her."

"I won't ever be done with her. she is my mate. so piss off." Nate harshly spat the boy walked away quickly.

"are you ok?" Nate asked i nodded "you know it would make me happy if you talked more and nodded less."

"oh ok sorry, yes I'm fine thank you." I smiled he handed me one of the cones. "I hope you like vanilla." he smiled carefully.

I started nodding but caught myself when I saw him looking at me "I mean yes, I love vanilla." i licked the cone gently making sure to not make a mess.

"so tell me about yourself." Nate scooted closer and for some reason it made me feel safe.

"I like to read. oh and listen to music, and sleep. I doodle, I can't draw but I can doodle." I started rambling "I watch movies a lot, I can't do a lot outside because over protective dad and all. but I like the inside less people. it's quite you know you can just relax."

he laughed "everything I expected." I shrugged grinning.

"tell me about you Mr. Bad boy." I teased he shook his head.

"I fight, I don't draw, but I graffiti. I like the rush." he was smirking "I'm trying to impress you but I don't think it's working." he admits

I scrunch up my nose "not really." I slightly laugh.

"I'm not really good with the whole getting to know each other thing, I'm new at it." he nervously smiles getting up from the bench holding a hand out for me.

I nervously looked at it before slowly taking it. he lead us to the park as we ate our ice cream and threw away the holders.

"swings!" I cheered letting go of Nate's hand and rushing toward the swing sets. "I've only been on these a few times. I love them!" I sat down in one pushing off of the bark underneath me.

"your dad must have been really protective." Nate started walking over to me.

I nodded "he just doesn't want me to get hurt." I smiled trying to swing higher but failing. "could you help?" I motioned to the swing.

he nodded walking behind me and gripping my hips making me jump he laughed lightly "sorry." I mumbled

he pulled me back before pushing me off making me swing high a squeal coming from my lips loudly.

"too high!" I laughed his hands fell upon mine that where gripping the chains. "sorry." he laughed slowing me down. "I'll go easier."

I was lightly swinging back and forth while we chatted for a good hour. "so you're one of those A+ students?" he asked

I nodded "sometimes I get an A- in science due to my lack of enjoyment of it." I added

"I get solid B's and C's maybe you could help me in geometry I suck." I could tell he was smirking. "I'm getting dizzy, could we stop." I asked softly I was automatically stopped.

"thank you." I smiled getting up off of the swing. Nate's hand found mine as we walked back towards the town square.

••••••••••••

"tonight was fun, I really hope you will let me take you out again Lillie."

my mind rushed with several different emotions. did I want to go on another date? would my dad be ok with it? he was nice and funny, but I couldn't let my guard down.
it was just one date, I barley knew Nate.

"maybe." I softly smiled "goodbye Nate, thank you." I went to get out of the car when a hand gripped my arm making me flench back.

"sorry I keep forgetting." he nervously rubbed the back of his neck "uh." he paused again "is your opinion on me any better now?"

I sighed "I still don't know you or trust you, but you're very nice and easy to talk to. I had fun tonight thank you." I looked around "goodnight Nate."

he smiled contently "goodnight Lillie."


••••••••

the next few days went by in a blur, I had exam after exam and some how always ended up seeing Nate. he would always smile a bright smile, throwing a wink my way. then rip away from his group of friends to say a quick high and to see how I was doing, then end up walking me to my class.

it seemed like we where still the hot topic, but the stares have become less intimidating and more annoying.

as I focused on my feet that where currently trying to carry me as far away from this mass of people as possible. I ran right into someone.

I stumbled back landing right on my ass. "ouch." I whined my bag sprawled on the the floor next to my book.

"shit Lillie, I'm so sorry." the familiar deep voice spoke. kneeling in front of me was Nate, he quickly grabbed my bag and my right hand pulling me up easily back to my feet.

I shook my head grabbing my book and bag shoving it on my shoulder. "it's fine I was focusing on my feet and not anyone around me."

"again?" he lightly laughed "I told you to focus on the people in front of you feet." he winked I remember our conversation from a couple of days ago.

"I have to get to lunch, thank you for-you know." I turned to head to the lunch room when I was pulled back.

"could I maybe sit with you today?" Nate nervously asked "it's totally fine if not, maybe you could meet some of my friends." he added I blinked profusely and nervously "If you start to have one of your attacks then I'll leave. well not automatically because I'm going to want to make sure you're ok but I would be the cause and I would have to leave because I-" I threw my hand over his mouth to stop his rambling as I laughed softly I could feel a smirk grow underneath my hand.

"you and one friend can sit with us." I smiled "start slow, I'm not good with new people." he nodded my hand still over his mouth.

then I felt something wet swipe across my hand making me pull away fast. "did you just lick my hand!" I shrilled Nate erupted in laughter before speaking.

"I was going to kiss your hand, but licking it got a much better reaction." he laughed I whipped my hand on my jeans "fine then jerk you don't get to sit with me then." I teased

I turned to walk away when my hand was pulled back "hey hey hey, don't be like that me and my tongue are sorry." he pretended to pout. "please let us sit with you?"

"fine." I grinned he dramatically fist pumped the air murmuring a 'yes' I shook my head as I laughed to myself, turning and walking to the cafeteria Nate by my side.











authors note

HELLO RAD PEOPLE HOW ARE YOU?

SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG, BUT HERE IS CHAPTER 3!

TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK.

ENJOY

- M