Story of a girl

Chapter 5

It stormed all week. I couldn't get my mind off of her. I mean we haven't talked since. How do you kiss someone like that and then not talk to them. I still haven't talked to James, and I'm not going to talk to him until he apologizes. I thought about texting him, but I don't want to seem weak. I always give into him. It's not like he does anything for me. Well I guess it's been a week. Maybe, he feels bad.

It was Friday night, I still couldn't play football because of my foot. I don't see how sprained ligaments is a big deal. I mean there not broke, so why can't I play. It is what it is. I thought about going to support my team but James hates me, and as for the rest of the football team they seem pretty cool with me.  Football is my life. I work hard to get worked hard to get where I am today. I think what sets me apart from other players is my heart. I play every game like it's my last, I throw every pass like it's my last , because you don't know when your last game going to be your last. You got a leave on the field. I pray that I will be back before the seasons over because I'm need scholarship. I had a bunch of colleges looking at me, but I don't know if any still are. I mean I play other sports, but those are just keep me fit for football. 

Well, someone has to make the first move with Chelsea. I guess that person is  going to be me. I know Chelsea and she's not much of a football type. Friday night she likes to sit by her window and read book. She says she likes to do that because on the bench seat underneath her window, the Moon and stars shine a little brighter on Friday nights. Making the perfect reading light. So, I decided to take it upon myself to bring pizza and sit with her on that lovely lovely window seat and talk to her.

The storm had passed but it was still a little cloudy. I put on a pair of old jeans and a Notre Dame sweatshirt. Notre Dame is my absolute dream school. I don't know why it just is. I had a chance at going, but right now with me not being able to play football. I don't know if they still want me. Also I would need almost close to 100% scholarship because I wouldn't be able to afford it. There is still plenty of schools out there where I can get my degree.

I decided change out of my Notre Dame sweatshirt. Knowing me I would get pizza sauce on it. So, I just put on plain gray sweatshirt. I ran downstairs. To find my mom watching her favorite show  on Netflix, Orange is the New Black.

   "Mom can I go to Chelsea's for a little bit?"

"Of course you can. Just be home at a decent time. Maybe you should stop by James is afterward. You have been to his house a while."

"Yeah maybe." I lied. I wasn't gonna go talk to him.

I drove into town and picked up a pizza. Then came back into my neighborhood. I park a Little ways down the street from her house because her mom might not want me here.

I walked around to  where her window was and threw rocks at  her window. It took a couple tries but she eventually came to the window.

She opened the window and said, "What do you want Ethan?"

"I have pizza?" I said in an uncomfortable voice.

"Okay come on up." she said as she pulled her head back into her room. It was pretty hard trying to get up there with a pizza. She stuck her head out the window again. "My mom just left, but she will be back in like ten minutes. You can go through the the front door."

"That makes this way easier." I said as I started walking to the front of her house.

I was finally in her room. She was sitting on her bed.

"Thanks for the pizza." She said. "What's up?"

"Ah nothing just bored. How was your week?" I said as my attempt at small talk

"It was alright." She said laying back on her bed.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"You. Your what's wrong."

"How am I what's wrong."

"Your the problem because I didn't want a relationship. I didn't want one because all you do is get hurt and attached. People always leave. Nothing meant to last forever. All things die out. I just figured we would just be friends. I never meant to fall for you. I spent all these year thinking you were out of my league and you are a terrible person with no personality. I was wrong, you're a great person. I spent so much time thinking you were just like all the other guys. The guy every girl was head over heals in love with. The guy all other guys wanted to be. I always thought you were apart of the 'it' crowd. Then I met you. Then I talked to you. Then I fell for you."

"Chelsea, it's okay to fall for someone. It's okay to be attached to people. I mean, people do leave, but some people stay."

"Kinda like how you have know James since preschool, but your not talking to him."

"That different." I said.

"How is that different? You guys are best friends, yet you left each other. Do you see why I don't want to get attached because we're gonna leave here soon. The school year is gonna end and we're never gonna talk to each other again."

"You don't know that. What if I want to be with you?" I said as my face turned red hot.

"Ethan, no one want to stay with me. No one stays because I'm not extraordinary. I'm not special. There is nothing about me that's with while. No one cares. No one sees. Nobody really ever sees. No one cares about me."

"I care about you Chelsea. Don't you get that. Don't you see that I truly care about you. Yet you let these douche bags hurt you. You don't see what's right in front of you. Chelsea I car about you a lot, but you don't let me. Chelsea I want be in your life. Okay?"

"Ethan you can do so much better than me. Why do you want a girl who can only give you a puddle, when you deserve the ocean." She said, I could see the tears forming in her eyes.

"Chelsea, I want you because your everything that I have ever dreamed of. I don't want a fancy house. I don't want a thousand cars. I want you. I want all of you. Don't you see that. I don't want those cheerleader who fail there classes. I don't want those girls who pucker there lips until the suffocate.  I want the girl who is quite, sweet and love the world. I want to slash in a puddle not swim in the ocean. "

"But the world doesn't love me back. Okay? I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I'm not perfect. I'm sorry I don't like sports. I'm sorry that I'm not into the popular things. Okay? I'm sorry Ethan."

I just sat there. Starring at her. Her face was hot with tears, her lower lip trebling. The glasses magnified her blood shot eye. She might be a little broke, but  that okay because I'm a little broke too.  I lunched forward kissing her. It was a feeling that I craved so much. It almost killed me.

She pulled back and said, " You know you saved me right."

I sat up, "How?"

"You know that day that you tried to stop those boys. I was gonna kill myself that afternoon, but you showed me that there is still good people in the world. People who care."

She remembered. A rush of anger flew over me. I hate myself for that. I will never get over it. That only proves that I'm no better then my dad. I tried to say something, but no words came out.

She put her hand on my shoulder. "It's okay. I know you didn't mean it. You didn't understand. Plus you were the one that made them stop."

I shook her hand off of me. "No, it's not OK. I hurt you in ways no one should ever feel. The fact that I pushed you to the point where you wanted to kill yourself. Your not supposed to put your hands on the ones you love. That makes no better than my father."

"Ethan, I'm okay now. Really I am." She pulled up her selfs on her  oversized sweatshirt reveling her wrist. They were covered in old scars, but no new ones. "See I'm fine."

"Oh," I sighed in relief.

"Kiss me!" She said randomly.

"What?" I asked dumbfounded that she asked that.

"I'm done being scared that your gonna hurt me. I'm done thinking that your no good for me. I guess that's what love is; giving someone the power to hurt you and hoping they don't."