You and your new husband sat on the couch once again. Ichi treated your child like a little happy cat. A small smile found its way into his face.
"(y/n)."
"Yes, Ichimatsu?"
"What's his name?"
"It's Juicymatsu!"
"Nice."
You laughed and ended up making out with him, your baby watching joyfully, the usual baseball in his little hand.
The man who betrayed you the last chapter then walked in. "(y/n)-chan, I'm home-Huh?" You pulled away from his droopy eyed brother and stared at Choro. "And what makes you think you can come back here?"
"Huh? What do you mean, (y/n)-chan?"
"I thought you were different, green man Matsu! It's too late for our relationship to work again! I'm with your cat brother now, and we'll be raising Juice together! You're out of the picture now, so back to the cotton candy haired neko girl you pounded last chapter!"
Ichiman's cat ears then sprouted out of his head. "N-Neko? Where?" he asked. You looked at your new husband. "Remember? The cat girl Choro cheated on me with last night?"
Ichimatsu's eyes widened. He went up to Choro and shyly asked, "C-Can you let me see this cat girl?" OH HECK NAH, SUGAR! you thought.
"Huh? Sure!" Then Chorofappyski and Ichi both went out together to have a threesome with Nyaa-chan, leaving you alone with your child, Juicymatsu.
You sat back down and stroked the sweet baby's head. "Oh Jyushimatsu baby, why does every boy have to hurt me? Every boy I've meet has hurt me-OW!" Juicy threw his baseball at your eye, interrupting you.
"Hm? What was that? A woman's voice?" you heard a soft voice say. Another Matsu came in with a stylish hat and a pink blazer.
"OH HECK NO!" you yelled. You grabbed Jyushi, hopped off the couch, and backed away from the new Matsu as much as you could. "There is NO way I'm letting another dang Matsu into my life! I've had enough, you hear me!?" You shouted at the ceiling, "GODMATSU, IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED FROM MEEE-"
"Woah, calm down lady! It's okay! I'm harmless!"
You sighed. "Whatever. You're the last one of them anyway, right? By this point I should just have no plans, as Karamatsu recommended." Right when you were about to sit on the couch, pink Matsu pushed you to the ground.
"Ah! What was that for?"
"What are you doing? Don't sit on that couch again! Whenever somebody sits on this couch with another person, love comes up between the both of them only to be shut down. I just didn't want to have the risk of sitting on the couch with you on accident!"
You then burst out laughing. "Haha, you think that I'll fall for a man who wears PINK? That's hilarious!"
"Hey! Men can wear pink too!"
"Yeah, and those men aren't very manly, let me tell YOU! Hah!"
Tater Totty's eyes darken and he starts to slowly walk towards you. "What are you doing? No seriously, what are you doing? It's scaring me."
"How about I show you how much of a man I can actually be?"
Blah, blah, blah. You two then did the nasty nasty and made a new baby and named him Iyami. The end.
SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
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Osomatsu-san x Reader (Attention)
Fanfictioncreds go to jachimatsu on tumblr for giving me ideas from her "when the matsus want attention" headcanon and whoever created the amazing cover, 'cause unfortunately it wasn't me Also, I hope you'll realize how cracky this is. Sorry if some Matsus ar...