What's Not Your's To Keep

Chapter 3

My faith

With one hand holding a cup of coffee and the other holding her bag, I sat down on a chair in a rather empty clothing boutique. 

"How does this one look? Is the red one or white one better? Ethan are you listening?! Which one?" She shoved two different dresses in my face.

"I don't know. Whatever." I took a massive sip of coffee. 

"Are you saying you don't care?" She said in a sad tone. 

"No. I'm just saying whatever you want. Don't have..." She cut me off.

"Look, I don't want to fight. You've been acting weird lately, and..." Her words trailed off. 

I glanced at my watch. This was going to be a long day. Shaylene sat down next to me, and I could see the sorrow in her eyes. All of a sudden I felt the urge to make her smile, as she was my girlfriend still. Her shoulder length ash blond hair was slightly in her face, so I reached to put it behind her ear. Just than, the store door opened with a bell. Distracted, I looked at the entrance to find Christina all by herself enter the boutique looking just beautiful in her coat and fur scarf. She went to the side racks and searched for something in the shirt section. I could feel my pulse quicken, and see myself getting up towards her. 

Shaylene grabbed my arm. "I'm sorry." 

I smiled hoping she would just forget the apologizing. 

"No really Ethan. I'm sorry for what ever I did to piss you off."

"Shay. You don't need to say sorry."

She wrapped her arms around me in a hug. I awkwardly hugged her back, with my gaze still in Christina. Shaylene whispered quietly, "I love you.." 

I replied the thought with a blank, "I love you too." I waited for her to let go so I could say I was going to the men's washroom as an excuse to pass Christina. She didn't let go. 

I heard the clanking of heals coming our way. Christina walked towards us and I began to loosen Shaylene's grip so I could escape. "Ethan right? What a surprise." She smiled. 

"Yeah. Hey. Christina." I tried hard not to embarass myself. Shaylene looked up at me with a confused expression and I was scared she noticed the nervousness in my voice.

"And you must be Shaylene, Ethan's girlfriend. I'm Jake's fiancee." They exchanged greetings, and than went right into direct conversation as if they were best friends. I stood feeling neglected and lonely, smiling every so often. In between I would say a line or two just to show that I was still here. 

"That is so cute. Most definitely the red one." Christina answered Shaylene's question.

"Thank you. I just could'nt pick. This frozen gnome..." Shaylene said shoving me at the side, "doesn't have an opinion."

"It's men in general you know! But sometime's they are so sweet though. I secretly saw what Jake got me for Christmas, and honestly I wouldn't want anything more." She blushed and I felt a surgeof envy. I should be the one buying her gifts...

Their conversation continued and I walked outside for some fresh air. The wind against my face cooled me off so I could think straight once again. Christina is Jake's. Jake is my best friend.Shaylene is my girlfriend. I am Ethan. Ahh. I just wanted to explode..

"So next Saterday? Royal Chasity Restaurant, don't forget. And bring Jake too." I turned around to find Shaylene and Christina. 

"Yes. So it's a double date?" Christina said.

"Ahem... We should be going. See you around Christina. Tell Jake I said hey." I interrupted.

"For sure." She smiled awkwardly, and than went back inside the store. 

I walked towards my car and sat down. I felt a bit angry that I ended the day short, and lost a couple of minutes in Christina's presence. Shaylene went around and got in the passenger seat. "She's such a sweetheart. Jake is really lucky. " She giggled. 

I was fustrated and stayed silent.

"They are going to get married! When did he even meet her? She says its been a year that they were secretly dating. You should have heard how he proposed to her! I can't believe you never knew! Your best friend is engaged to a gorgeous lady and you didn't know." She babbled continuously.

I wanted to tell her to shut up, but instead I reached for her face and kissed her violently. Her eyes grew wide open, and I knew I had taken her by surprise. The kiss wasn't romantic at all, but out of the need to partly shut her up but also because I could feel myself wanting to kiss someone. Someone named Christina but instead I went for the next best thing since Christina was unavailable. That made me mad. I pulled Shaylene closer to me and continued kissing her. I felt her hands on my chest pulling me away. Her face struggled to be freed from my grip, and when I finally stopped... her hand met my face in a slap.

"What the hell Ethan!" She wiped a tear from her cheak. "You're a.. a..." She was crying, and I felt horrible. I put my face on the steering wheel, and felt my hands soften. 

"Shay... I'm... I really am sorry." I touched her hand gently, and she brushed it away. 

"You're not sorry."

"No I am. Promise." This time I meant it. That was a stupid move, and I knew it. 

She shook her head. 

"Stop. Shaylene your making me feel like crap."

"Good." She shot back.

I sighed, then got out of the car. Over the past few days I have been treating her so bad, and that was wrong of me. All because I feel something for Christina doesn't mean I don't care for Shaylene. This whole thing, I'm going to blame on my hormones. Fuck my hormones. 

I walked into a random store that looked decorated with flowers and pretty stuff from the outside. The walls were painted a light shade of lavander and on a chair sat a man in his late 60s. 

"Hello young man." He said with a wide smile. 

"Hello sir. Do you have anything that would help me make up with a girl after a mistake?" I hesitated. "She likes rainbows, unicorns, and pink things."

He laughed in a father-like way. "Yes of course we have rainbows, unicorns, and pink thing." The man got up from his seat and slowly went to an area full of assorted flowers. He picked out several, mixed and matched until he had created a nice looking bouquet. From the front shelves, he brought back a heart box full of chocolates. "Is this okay?" He chuckled.

"Yes. Thank you sir." I layed down some bills on the counter. "And keep the change." 

He nodded and smiled thankfully.

I Walked back to the car, and found Shaylene leaning against the window. She wasn't stubborn enough to walk out of the car, catch a bus, and go to her parents house. I opened the door and sat down on the drivers seat. "Hey."

She didnt look at me.

I placed the box of chocolate and flowers on her lap. "See? I'm sorry."

She glanced at the gifts quickly and went back to ignoring me.

We drove home in silence, and I began to miss her talking. She talked so much, and seeing her not talk at all made me feel like something was missing. Shaylene just sat there leaning against the window.

When we got home, She didn't even bother to take the chocolate and flowers inside. I had to do that myself, as she quietly walked in the house without looking back. Before I made my way to the kitchen, Shaylene was already upstairs. The house was still, and it didn't even feel like anyone other than me was in it. I went upstairs to find her undressed and in bed. I undressed into my home clothes as well and slipped in beside her. She grumbled, got up, took her pillow, and walked away. And that's when I noticed after a long time in the course of our relationship... she was mad at me.