Into The Smoke

He Is All That Matters

Stefan's posture was telling Gabby the one thing she needed to know the most in that split second - he was scared. It was clear to everyone that Stefan didn't know Matt as well as everyone else did but he was making a effort. It had been four weeks ago that he had taken the new job in Chicago to be closer to his brother and family. It was a bold move and it showed to the people close to Casey that he was here to stay. It took a certain person to pick up their whole life and move it hundreds of miles across the country, all for one thing - family. Being an Homicide Detective was hard in New York, or so they say, but Chicago was worse. There was always murders on the news at night. That was the price you had to pay for living in the most beautiful city in the whole world. Nothing is ever completely perfect, nothing in the world is perfect enough not to have one flaw, its that one flaw that makes people second guess the right for that object, that thing to be perfect and in some aspects, it's kind of sad.

Gabby was thankful that Stefan had come, she was even more thankful that one of the men where polite enough to call him. Some how having Stefan within touching distance made everything seem less terrifying. It was almost as if Matt was here with them, that his presence was among them and he was here to guide them through the rough patch. It was a thing they all knew he'd do, and the fact that Matt wasn't here to tell them that everything was going to be okay was the thing that was causing the most problems.

Glancing round the room she could feel the team looking at her. She didn't care. She didn't care that tears where streaming down her face; that she was now holding Jamie's little hand so tightly to make herself feel like she was able to do this, to make everything seem like it was okay. She just didn't care. Without even thinking about it, Gabby began to lower herself to the floor.

Jamie's naturally bright blue eyes were dimmed by his emotions, but still searching hers for answers to questions he'd never even consider asking. All he was concentrating on was not letting his eyes leek the tears that where burning at the back of his throat. He wanted to cry like nothing he'd ever felt before. He wanted to run into his father's arms and be held in such a loving hug it blocked out all the bad things in life. The fact that he knew he never could do that was enough by its self to make anyone want to cry. Not closing his eyes until his mother's arms where wrapped around him, he rested his chin on her shoulder and silently let the tears slide down his face. He made not a single sound as the knot in the depths of his throat tied itself tighter and tighter, even if he had wanted to speak he wouldn't been unable to. The busy sounds of the ED all seemed to fade to a faint hum before finally it was silent. Jamie let his mind wander as time slowed down.

"Jamie, come on Monkey you can do it!" Matt yelled, a big smile on his face, as he held out his hands in case his son fell.

"Dad i can't do it!" Jamie replied as he stood on the ledge of the wooden climbing frame, both hands gripping tightly to the handles to his sides. The monkey bars seemed further to go and most certainly higher from up here. Only being brave enough to let one hand go, Jamie brought it up and adjusted his hat so it was further down over his head. Meeting eyes with his father, the nerves seemed to subside slightly; Jamie knew that his father would do everything to keep him out of any type of danger. Deep down he knew he was safe, he just needed to keep telling himself that.

Matt saw that Jamie was scared. He watched him for a moment, a smile still on his face as he watched his son try and combat his fears. Jamie was strong and he knew that, and when the time was right he knew that Jamie could do anything that he put his mind to; like every child, they needed to do it on their own to really feel like they'd accomplished something and this was exactly what Jamie was going through. Matt took a deep breath and watched a white cloud escape from his mouth as he exhaled. Meeting Jamie's eyes he walked in his direction; within a few seconds Matt was stood in front of his son and looking up to him because of the platform Jamie was standing on. He reached up and placed his gloved hands on Jamie's sides - they where padded out because of the coat his son was wearing. "I know that you're scared Monkey." He started softly as Jamie leaned forwards, expectant that his father would catch him. Like Jamie anticipated, he slid right into his father's arms and rested his head against Matt's shoulder. "You'll do it next time, i promise."