Stronger(Fifth Harmony/You)

Chapter 17

Your nothing

Your pathetic

Not even your parents love you

I shook my head trying to stop my horrible thoughts.

They chose the better Y/LN

They never loved you in the first place

My knees were in my chest as my arms were wrapped tightly around them as I rock myself back and forth with tears in my face.

Stop!Stop!

You are fuckin pathetic that it makes me wanna laugh

I clench my eyes tight as I grip the bed sheets tight.

I am not pathetic!

If you are not which you are then tell me why did they chose Y/BN over you

I could not even have a response to my own thoughts.

They cheated on you for months with your own flesh and blood

Stop...please

They had sex with him for god knows how many times and they kiss with all the love they could give each other. They even reveal to the media their relationship the next day when Chris posted the photo. Do you still think they care about you or even love someone like you,someone that has no job,achievements or goals in life and to top it all of you are fuckin broke.

I cried and cried in pain at the truth of my horrible thoughts of myself but it is all true.

I just can't believe how my day went downhill so fast. Hours earlier I was so happy spending my time with Chrissy. After spending my time with Chrissy I drove her home then I went back to mine and Y/B/N apartment to take a nap. Instead of having good dreams about earlier I had nightmares about the day I caught my ex lovers cheating on me.

Even till today I still have a hard time believing how could they just do that to me. Lie to my face everyday. Telling me,promising me how they love me and how they never do anything to hurt me.

Lies,just fucking stupid lies.

By just remembering that awful night makes my heart go into oblivion of sadness.

I sat there staring at the ceiling of my room thinking which has been my new favorite thing. I think about how I am gonna handle working at Syco records next week. I've been missing a lot of days at work because I'm scared that if I even see them with Y/BN happy and in love my heart could not take it.

I just gotta be strong and face my fears. I just can't seat here for all of my life with no job that's unfair for Y/B/N.

Suddenly I felt my stomach growl with hunger. I took a look at the wall clock at the corner of my room 8:00 p.m.

Time to eat.

I quickly made my way to the kitchen in record time. I open the fridge but quickly close it in anger when I found no food. Well there's food but not food that's ready to eat its more like food to cook which I can't.

I sigh in defeat as I sat at the stool in the island. A wonderful thought came into my mind.

Y/B/N will arrive at any minute from work she can cook me food.

By just thinking of Y/B/N cooking me food made my stomach growl in pure hunger. Y/B/N is really a good cook like really. I remember the first time I tried her chicken and steak I made her cook it for a whole week. My stomach growl so loud I think it reach my neighbors room. I gotta distract myself before I die of hunger.