Dead Without You (MarkiplierXReader)

Part 7

The waters nice, I should do this more then once a year.

I smiled at my attempt to joke as the warm water ran down my back. It was calming, letting the water trickle down my body. There was no sound other then the water hitting the ground. I grabbed the shampoo that Mark gave me and started putting it in my h/c hair. Finally, I won't be as disgusting. Maybe Mark won't stare at me anymore. Maybe he'll think I don't look bad anymore. That's impossible... Shampoo washes away dirt not ugliness (I'm sorry, you just think that way in this).

____

I turned off the water and moved the shower curtain. As I stepped out of the shower I looked for the towel. It sat on the floor in a ball. I picked it up and started drying off. I wonder if Mark found any clothes that would fit me, I hope so. I wrapped the towel around my body and started to walk to the door, then stopped as I saw something in the corner of my eye. I turned to my right and looked at the foggy mirror. I wiped some fog and saw my face... I wish it wasn't mine. I wish it looked better. I wish I had make up. I wish I had a mask. I wish... I looked away to avoid my flaws. Even without seeing them, I knew they were there. I opened the door of the bathroom and stepped out. Before moving further I took a deep breath. The air felt stale in my lungs, but I didn't care. I walked down the hall to Mark's room and knocked on the closed door.

"Come in!" Mark yelled from his room. I slowly opened the door and saw him at his computer. He didn't look at me he was focusing on something. "So-" Mark cut off as he looked up to me. He didn't move. He saw someone disgusting in his room. He saw a monster. He saw the mistake he made bringing it home. He saw me. I quickly got out of his room and shut the door as I ran back to the bathroom.

I locked myself in and sat against the door in only a towel. My eyes felt watery. I have to leave. I can't do this to him. I don't want him to have to see me. I started looking for my clothes.

"Y/n?" Mark knocked on the bathroom door. I didn't move. Maybe he'll leave. "Y/n, are you ok?" Mark asked through the door. Tears started to roll down my cheeks. I am not ok. I almost died the previous day. I came here just to continue to be looked at as a freak. I'm ruining a man's life. I don't want to do that to him, to Mark. I grabbed my shirt quietly. "Y/n? Can you please come out?" Mark said softly. No he'll see me again, I don't want to make him do that. I started quickly putting on my clothes. I have to go. "Y/n?" Mark started to sound sad. Once I was fully dressed I was ready to leave. Where? Mark's at the door. Is there a window? "Y/n are you ok?" Mark said louder. I moved the shower curtain and saw a small window. It's not big enough to go through. At least not in my fat body. "Y/n, I'm just worried." Mark said. About what? I have no other choice I have to say something.

"I'm.. Fi n." I tried to say my throat still quite scratchy.

"Why'd you leave?" Mark questioned.

"I... I um..." I couldn't think strait. What could I say. What will make him leave? "I..."

"Y/n can you open the door?"

"No..." You could hear the tears in my voice. Great now he knows the monster is crying.

"Y/n are you ok?" Mark said slower. I licked my lips as I knew the real answer. Would I tell him the real answer?

"No..." I answered quietly.

"Y/n what's wrong?" I could hear Mark move closer to the door. I didn't want to burden him. I just kept my mouth shut. "Y/n you can tell me." But I won't. "Y/n I want to know." No you don't. "Y/n?" I wrapped my arms around my knees. He doesn't want to know. He doesn't care. He won't listen. He will leave. He just feels pity for you.

Mark doesn't love you...

_________________

This one is shorter, sorry. I just really wanted to end it like that. I will be getting the next part out soon though. Vote if you liked it, and don't if you didn't. Simple enough!

BUH BYE!!! Lol (lots of love)

-Me