Wanted

Chapter Six: Visitation

Arriving at the hospital to visit my mom was always hard for me. It still is. I can never get over seeing her like that, barley alive with all those tubes attached into her. Some of the doctor said that she might never wake up while others continue to provide me hope. But honestly, with each passing day, that hope I clung onto so desperately is starting to slide away. I soon found myself thinking of how I'm going to finally break the news to Celeste, but I could only seeing it ending with betrayal in her tear filled eyes. I could see her running away from me and shouting how much she hated me for not telling her sooner.

How the hell am I even going to tell her? I'm not just gonna walk up to her and say 'oh yeah, by the way, when you were just a kid our mother was nearly killed, you lost most of your memories of that day and all before that and I was forever traumatized,' because that's a perfect thing to say to 7-year-old.

As far as she's concerned, our mother is in Africa earning money and sending it to us. That night was just horrible and it change our lives for the worse. I know that she was only a child then and would hardly remember anything from that time even if nothing happen, but it still hurts. I hurts that she probably won't remember the Halloween were we dressed up as Superman and Batman, or how we were practically attached at the hip. It just hurts a lot. 

As I reached my destination, I pushed all that aside and placed the bouquet of tulips in the vase next to the hospital bed. When I sat down on the chair, all I could do is stare at her. I finally mustered up enough courage to actually step into her hospital room. I would only stand in the door way and see her from outside of the room, scared to face her. Many of the nurses and doctors came to me and tried to talk me into going in the room. They knew I was her child and they sympathized me whenever I would show up. I grew sick of their pity and didn't come for a while. With a short sigh to relax myself, I finally spoke. 

"Hey...mom, I don't know if you can hear me but I just wanna talk to you. I haven't done that since that night." I trailed into a pause, looking at the opened door and decided to close it as I didn't want others to hear my conversation.

"I'm sorry I haven't came in to visit. Well, I mean, I have but I never acrually came in. I just couldn't face you. I always felt that it was my fault that you're in this bed. I still feel like that, because I felt like I should have done more to help." I stopped again as I moved onto someone else as I started to feel selfish.

"Celestet doesn't remember that night or anything before that. I was thinking of telling her the truth soon, but I don't know how. I bet you would could find some way to softly break it to her, you seemed to be the best at doing that." I paused again as my eyes began to blurr from the tears that were threatening to fall.

"I wish you'd open your eyes and tell me that everything is gonna be alright. We miss you. I miss you." A sob escaped my lips as the tears fell down my cheeks like rain fell from the sky.

*Three Hours Later* 

I peeled open my dry eyes to reveal a blurry world. I blinked and rubbed my eyes to force them to focus back in to noticed a doctor checking up on my mom. I instantly reconized him as Dr. Karev, the guy who took care of my shoulder. His attention went from the folder to me, giving me a small smile.

"Oh good, you're awake." He quickly went to scribble something on the paper before closing it. "I was just about to wake you." Seeing that time slipped away from me, I asked the current time.

"It's about 3:50, visiting hours ended two hours ago." Confusion aroused in my as I smoothed out the wrinkles on my shirt.

"Why didn't anyone tell me?" Once I was done, I grabbed my phone to see nine missed calls and thirteen unread messages from both Joey and Randy.

"Well, in all honesty, the staff was happy that you finally walked in to your moms room so they didn't want to intrude."

"Thank you for your consideration, but I must be going." I gave him a tight smile before walking out the room and calling back the last recent missed call. It only rang once before he picked up the phone.

"Where the hell are you!? Why weren't you answering your phone?!" Randy shouted at me with intense worry. 

"I'm so sorry but I was visiting mom and I lost track of time and fell asleep and-" I rambled on as I tried to explain my absence to ease his worry. He interrupted me before I could finish.

"Wait, did you say that you're visiting your mom? Like actually in the room with her?" I paused as I didn't realize I said that but with a short sigh, I pushed the down button on the elevator and responded.

"Yes." Randy didn't speak for what left like forever before telling me that he was proud of me for finally walking in and that next time I should give him a heads up. I didn't want to tell him that the visiting hours were over since he seemed happy that I finally visited her. Since I didn't want to disappoint him, I let him know that I'll be out for another hour before we said out goodbye's. I took this time to fill my empty stomach with a burger and some fires but before I could even get to my car, I ran into someone I wasn't pleased to see.

"Funny meeting you here, Missy." 

"My name's not Missy, Brett. Just leave me alone." I walked past by him without giving him a glance. Realization hit me when I noticed that he never told me his name at school and only at the race. It was a good thing I came up with a lie when he stopped me. 

"Wait, how did you know my name?" I hissed quietly as he grabbed my bad shoulder to stop me. With a frim grip, I grabbed his hand and peeled it off. The throbbing pain triggered my irritation.

"I observe my surrounding Brett Kingston. Unlike some people."