Why I wasn't meant for you

CHAPTER 3

Chapter 3

“We’ll be fine, I promise.” Grandma tells me. It’s a hot sunny morning, I must say.

Grandpa has his arms around grandma. Their eyes are a bit teary. It’s only been two days and I’m already leaving them. Again.

Mom called again yesterday. She said they wanted to see me as soon as possible. She sounded sincere with her words, but who knows? I don’t feel like home when she talks. Not even a little. I’m not even sure if this whole thing is worth it. But, I don’t know why I’m taking the risk anyway. 

I talked to Matt as well. We’ve been planning so many things for this summer. We’ve planned to learn surfing together, watch movies with our high school friends together, and maybe try some cool new stuff together. But those things will never come into reality now, at least not this summer.

Matt is giving me a ride to the airport. I don’t care how many times I say this but, really, thank God there’s Matt. Thank God I have a best friend like Matt. I can’t imagine what my life would be like if I haven’t met him. I wish he’d go with me. That’d be so awesome.

"Matt, drive safely okay?” Grandma pleads Matt.

“I will, Mrs. Ferrars.” Matt tells grandma as he closes the trunk of his car.

Grandpa and grandma are at the gate. I walk towards them to bid my final good bye, for now.

“I’ll see you soon,” I hold each of their hand together. “Real soon."

“We’re going to miss you again, kiddo.” Grandpa says.

“Me, too.”

“You better get going, then. You don’t wanna be late for your flight.”

I hug them one last time.

 *        *        *        *        *

“I can’t believe you’re leaving me this summer.” Matt tells me after he takes my baggage off the trunk of his car.

“I know. I can’t believe it either. But I have to do this.”

“Good luck on that.” He says with a smile.

“Thanks, man.” I rub his left arm.

He turns to look at my hand on his arm for a moment. He takes my hand and holds it while he stares at me for a brief while.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” he’s still holding my hand. Maybe, just maybe, my face is turning red. Matt has never held my hand like this before. “But hell, Alex, I’ll miss you. Call me when you get there.”

I laugh a little and he finally lets go of my hand.

What was that all about? I never really got a chance to notice how good looking Matt is until now. He’s certainly taller than me. His body toned a little. His eyes are as dark as his hair. Even just by simply being on his white shirt and jeans, and chucks, he definitely looks good. Oh God, what am I thinking? Matt’s my best friend! I’m not in the position to look at him the way other girls do. I try to shake the thought away from my mind before everything gets cliché between us. If Katie were here right now, she’d probably kill me if she were capable of reading minds.

“Sure, I will. I promise.” I manage a smile.

“Immediately.” He cuts me off at an instant. His voice is serious. What’s up with this guy?

“Obviously, patience is not in your vocabulary Krabby Matty.” I pinch his nose.

He takes my hands for the second time around. Both hands. Slowly, he wraps my arms around his body. He releases my hands and hugs me. I hug him back. I swear, at this very moment, I am flushing, flushing red all over my cheeks. Matt smells so good. This guy sure is going to miss me this summer.

“Hey, I’ll call. I promise.” He squeezes me even tighter. “Immediately.”

“I’m sorry. Was I too close for comfort?” He laughs as he finally releases from hugging me.

“Yeah. A little.” I tease him.

“I just. . .” he sounds too frustrated. “Wish you wouldn’t have to go.”

“I wish that’d be possible, too.” We had so much amazing plans for summer. But, I’m still confused about the way he acted.

“This summer was supposed to be about . . . ” he pauses. I wait for him to continue. “Never mind.”

Matt shifts his gaze into my baggage.

“I think I better go check in already.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He helps me with my things. “You’re right.”

He assists me towards the airport’s entrance. As I enter, the guard checks my baggage. All non-passengers are not allowed to enter beyond this point so Matt stays outside. After the security guard is done inspecting my belongings, I grab them and step aside to a corner where I can see Matt. He’s standing there, waiting for me to disappear into the crowd. But before that happens, I make sure to wave my final goodbye. So I did. And glad he did as well. He smiles at me, and I feel something tingles within my stomach. What does that even mean? I shake the thought away for the nth time. It can’t be. I’m starting to hate myself.

 *        *        *        *        *

For almost two hours, I just sat here, in my assigned seat on the plane. Devouring every wonderful scene that surrounds me outside. I am among the clouds. It’s so breathtakingly beautiful and magnificent. My mind flies, far away from my head, far into the light blue sky around me. Luckily, my seat is beside the window. An old man seats beside me. He’s been sleeping since the moment the plane took off. He must be tired.

I am tired as well. But I couldn’t afford to lose sight of this amazing view right outside this window next to me. While I stare at the vastness of the sky, my mind wanders into so many places. I think about my parents, I think about grandma and grandpa, and I think about Matt, almost all at once. I think about how I would react at the instant I meet mom and dad, about how my grandparents are doing right now, about how I would spend this whole summer without Matt. Will I be able to get along with my parents? Will I be able to meet new people? Will I be able to enjoy every day of this summer? Will I be able to survive anything at all? So many uncertainties. The answer is too unpredictable as of now.

Another hour has passed. I fix myself, trying to get ready. The pilot announces that the plane is set for landing. We’re finally here. I’m finally setting foot to a new unfamiliar town, to a town where all people are strangers to me, to I town I’ve always dreamt of living in, to a town I used to always dreamt of living in.