Margaret's Pokémon Diamond Nuzlocke

Chapter 29: Aftermath

What have I done...?

I was still sobbing as I found myself back home, curled up in a ball on the floor. Nobody else dared to say a word as I clutched my head in my hands, as if squeezing hard enough would break me free of the sick nightmare I was in.

I wanted to believe that none of this was real, that I was put into some horrible coma after the explosion, and that once I woke up, my mom, Trevor and the team would be right there waiting for me at the edge of the hospital bed I was tucked in. And there, surrounded by their relieved smiles, I would be safe.

But the more I thought about what I had just witnessed, the more it made sense. Almost everything Cyrus told me in that cave matched perfectly with my past, fitting in like the final piece of a puzzle I never wanted to finish. Thinking back, even some of the nightmares or visions I've had lined up with my past too. Everything else I could think of fell right into place as well, and at this point my mind was scrambling to find just about anything that didn't line up. But I couldn't. It only brought more and more pieces of evidence that fit in so flawlessly they practically taunted me. It tortured me to no end, but all I could do was sit there and cry, slowly losing any kind of hope that I was just stuck in another bad dream. I'd cried before in dreams, but these tears were all too terribly real.

I don't know how long I sat there, forcing everyone to watch me wallow in a pit of the endless emotions I was feeling. Twenty... maybe thirty minutes they all waited? Could've been hours for all I knew. Could've been days.

Hell if I cared.

Even after I did calm down and it seemed like I couldn't possibly cry any longer, I stayed there on the floor, despondent and unable to muster up the strength to get up or even move. My hair was down from their usual low pigtails, and whatever strands that weren't sprawled around me were matted to my forehead and cheeks, all moist from either sweat or tears.

I heard a sniffle coming from my mom before she spoke, "This... was what it was like the first time too... You'd just shut yourself in your room, sometimes for days without coming out. I... I just couldn't stand seeing you so miserable, so I just had to... I just wanted things to be normal again. So when Professor Juniper told me she could take your memories, I... Y-you understand, don't you Margaret?"

I remained motionless on the floor, not answering my mother. Of course I understand, idiot. Who wouldn't want to just forget something like that?

I heard a quiet sigh come from my mom as she took a few steps closer and knelt down. "C'mon... we should get you back onto the bed, okay?"

I still didn't answer, but in a few seconds she grabbed me by my arms anyway to try lifting me up.

Just about everyone else in the room pitched in too, combining their strength to stand up my limp body. Even if someone wasn't technically holding me up in any way, they still gently touched me as I was lied down on the mattress. My back was up against the wall, sitting me up so I could see everyone's faces staring at me.

Everyone but Cole. He was gone.

"...Did you guys... see it?" I forced myself to ask.

The five members of the team still there slowly nodded without a word.

"We touched the mask too..." Aline mumbled.

"Maggie..." Gloria said in the gentlest tone, "Listen, I-"

"No." I stopped her. "Whatever it is you have to say, I don't wanna hear it. Let me guess, you're gonna go on and say something to try and make me feel better, right? Like how it wasn't my fault, or how you'll always be there for me or some other cheesy, sappy shit like that. Well it doesn't matter! None of it does! Nothing you can ever say will fix this or make it better in the slightest! Nothing will ever change the fact that I was responsible for that-- that genocide!!!" I began to shout as tears were streaming down my face.