My hand instinctively reaches for the tiny head in front of me to caress it in a loving manner; and then, I bring myself forward to kiss Fin's cheek. Rayon grins, a dark black circle around his left eye. There is a similar circle around the other eye, but it's mostly red and hardly visible. Tiny cuts and abrasions linger around his forehead and cheeks. Many of them have healed since yesterday, but a greater number remain. I never liked being reminded of how much pain he was put through when he fought Apollo in training, but the Capitol refused to get rid of his scars, which they are very capable of doing, because they want Caesar to ask about them while we are interviewed. Not only did they leave Rayon with his wounds, but they left them on all of us. We only received minor treatment for the wounds that could turn life-threatening. Cuts were cleaned to minimize risk of infection. Large wounds were bandaged. They even gave me a brace for my wrists and ankle, and one arm rests in a sling so it can heal properly. Tomorrow at ten the Games will begin, so I have a feeling that after the interviews our injuries will be taken care of. After all, they'll want everyone in perfect fighting condition, won't they?
A soft voice informs us that we'll be interviewed next. I look at Rayon. who carries Fin in his arms. He returns my worried stare.
"Just don't worry about it. They'll probably just ask a lot of questions about Fin anyway." He says.
"I know." I nod, looking at the floor. Fin's fingers wrap tightly around my finger. "I just - I don't know what to say. When I get up there, I'll freeze up. You know I will, I'm not good at--"
"Hey," Rayon grabs my chin and makes me look at him. I see the bruises around his eyes and feel a stab of guilt. "I said don't worry about it. I'll be right behind you. You have nothing to fear when you're up there; and if you get stuck, just look at me, and you'll remember what to say."
His smile makes my heart beat faster, and I can't help the fluttery feeling inside my stomach when his eyes look deep into mine. I remember why I love him, and I remember what he means to me.
Then they're calling Ramie Ashworth, and the feeling in my stomach is similar, but riddled with terror. I quickly press a kiss to his cheek, and he gives Fin to me gently. It's difficult to hold him with only one hand, but not impossible. What's impossible is walking in the shoes my Stylist put me in. I wobble a few times before figuring it out, and then my walk is steady, but very slow.
Lights flood the stage and capture me in them as I walk toward Caesar. My heartbeat is still ringing in my ears, but I manage to keep the terror off my face. I smile as if I were smiling at Rayon, and soon I'm standing beside Caesar Flickerman, the Master of Ceremonies. He's smiling at me like we've known each other for quite some time, and for some reason, this makes me feel at ease. I take a seat with Fin draped over one arm. Caesar looks at Fin with wild enthusiasm, and gives the audience an expression of pure joy. They quickly settle down, waiting breathlessly for Caesar to ask the first question. I can tell they enjoy him very much. I try to act like I do as well, but in reality I know very little of Caesar.
"Ramie Ashworth! What a delight it is to have you here, and even more to have your little boy with us today!"
The audience applauds. Although my cheeks flare red with anxiety, I try to smile kindly.
"Of course." I manage. Caesar's eyes drop to my sling, after studying the many bruises on my face.
"My goodness, you too?" He says, appalled. I remember the other tributes had to fight as well, and there were plenty of others interviewed before me. Caesar at least had an idea of what was going on, if he wasn't outright told.
"A fight between myself and Luciana Drovens." I say. It sounds too casual. I sound like a Career. I quickly make sure my face shows expressions of unhappiness. Caesar picks up on this quickly.
"Oh, that's too bad." He says. "Did you win?"
"No, I didn't." I say, and chuckle a bit.
"That's too bad." Caesar says, with real concern to his voice. It makes me feel much better, how genuine his responses appear to be. I smile slightly, and the interview continues.
"I think there is something the audience is dying to know--and you know, I have to admit that I'm dying to know as well--what's the baby's name?" Says Caesar.
The audience waits for me to say this grand thing, to tell them my son's name and for it to be a magical moment, but all I feel inside is fear. My lip quivers and my chest tightens, but I remember Rayon's advice, I remember he said I shouldn't worry. I turn my head just enough to see him standing, out of the audience's view, at the head of the line of tributes who have yet to be interviewed. He smiles reassuringly, and it's as if a weight has been lifted off me. I look at Caesar, and give him my best smile.
"His name is Fin." I say softly. The audience eats it up, cheering for him and clapping uncontrollably. I give a slight embarrassed laugh, and then the interview goes on. Actually I'm quite surprised that Fin has behaved so well. I glance at him; he is enraptured by the loud audience, he does not fear it. I smile at him.
"That is a wonderful name, Ramie, wonderful. I'm sure you chose it wisely." Caesar pats my arm. I smile.
"Yes, I did." I mumble. I look back at Rayon for reassurance. He's smiling. I must be doing well.
"So, I have to say, you look stunning in your dress. Look at her, isn't she stunning?" Caesar asks, and the audience shows their support with more enthusiastic cheer. By now Fin is less awed by it and a little more frightened. He lets off a quiet whimper which silences the audience a little bit.
"I mean really, your Stylist must be a genius." Caesar maintains his approval of my honeydew shift with sparkling stones on the shoulders. I try to act casual, but a blush makes its way to my cheeks.
"Thank you Caesar, and he is a genius." I say, then think of something to add. "He made a matching costume for Rayon, my partner." I look back at him, suit matching in colour to my dress. He smiles, but lowers his head, almost ashamed of the flattery.
"Oh? Well, I'm sure we'd love to see him, when it's his turn. So, are the rumors true? Is Rayon really the father of your baby?"
I feel a slight shock at the inquiry. "Well, yes." I say, and again look at Rayon. He seems confused. So am I; how could Caesar think it would be anyone but Rayon? I thought our performance during the parade would have eased any doubts about that.
"Tragic, so tragic." The cameras flash my face briefly, and I look sick. I blink away tears and keep my head up strong.
"Let me jump back for a second here," Caesar says quickly, directing my attention off his last statement. "How are you liking the Capitol? Has your stay been enjoyable?"
I bounce Fin gently so that maybe he'll stop fussing. "Well, it's been nice." I say, pressing a smile to my lips.
"And how's the food?"
"Oh, I've enjoyed the food. I think Rayon is in love with chocolate pudding." I giggle, and the audience seems to enjoy this.
Caesar chuckles, and asks, "You've never had chocolate pudding? What are they serving you down in District Eight?"
Oh Caesar, if only you knew.
"So, you like the food, Rayon likes the pudding -- but what do you think of the people? Are they any different from what you're used to?"
"Well," I try to think of home. I know my family is a lot different than the people I meet here. But, to be honest, the district and Capitol have more in common than you'd expect. "I see you wearing a lot of the clothes we make in District Eight, which I think is good for us." The audience laughs. "But, I think the people here and the people there differ in just a few ways."
Caesar is on the edge of his seat. "How so?" He asks.
"Well, in the districts we're a lot more conservative. But here, everything is replaceable, so people are a lot more inclined to throw away things that in my district are more precious than gold."
A hush falls over the crowd. I almost think I've said too much, but Caesar reclaims their attention and it's as if nothing's happened.
"Oh my, that is a difference. Well then, let me ask you this, do you miss home? How about the people there, the ones you left behind? Will they miss you?"
Fin squirms in my arm. I grip him tight, which only upsets him, but it's the only way to keep him from falling out of my arm since the other requires a sling. I try to think about Caesar's questions, and to answer them quickly, but Fin keeps squirming and eventually begins to cry.
"Oh here, do you mind if I?" Caesar looks at me, arms outstretched, prepared to take Fin. I am cautious, at first. But I don't see the harm, and hand him over carefully. He settles into Caesar's embrace naturally; I guess Caesar's calming demeanor puts infants at ease, too. I smile, playing with Fin's hands.
"He likes you." I say very quietly. The audience produces a simultaneous awe, and Caesar is flattered.
"I'm so glad! Otherwise that would've been awkward." We laugh. It's the first time I realise I've laughed in awhile. I glance at Rayon, who stares lovingly.
"To answer your questions, Caesar, I do miss home. I miss it terribly. You know," I pause, contemplating whether to share this piece of information with the whole of Panem. I suppose it couldn't hurt, in fact, it may earn me a few sponsors. Our mentor told us we needed plenty of those. "Fin was born on Reaping Day."
A gasp from Caesar, the audience follows.
"No!" He says in pure disbelief. I nod very seriously. "Our very own Reaping baby!"
"Yes, I suppose he is." I say, smiling. Though I do not like the nickname very much.
"So how did it happen? Surely you made it to the reaping on time?"
"Of course. We left before I had the chance to hold him in my arms for the first time, but, we made it to the reaping." The audience roars to life. I didn't know the story would make such an impression. My smile never fades, my hopes for sponsorship high.
Caesar waits until the audience is quiet to say, "Oh, my goodness. So, when did you get to hold him?"
I brush curly hair behind my ear. "Not until we were inside the Justice Building. That's when Felix told me we could bring him to the Capitol. He's going home tonight."
"Oh, and who will he be staying with?"
"Well, my mother and sister are going to--" I stop as soon as the buzzer sounds. I didn't think three minutes would have gone by so quickly. Especially being on stage, as frightened as I am of it. Caesar and I both stand, and he addresses the audience as well as myself.
"Unfortunately that's all the time we have for you, Miss Ashworth. I wish we could talk more, but rules are rules and the other tributes await their turn! Please, let's have a warm thank-you to Ramie, the tribute from District Eight!"
The audience cheers, and I give them my best smile. I'm handed Fin, and it isn't until I'm off the stage completely that I realise he didn't once ask about my injuries. Perhaps he meant to, and didn't have the time. I'm content though, knowing by the audience's reaction that my interview must have gone well. I sit where I had been before, and watch Rayon as he makes his way to the stage for his interview. I take a deep, slow breath, and cross my fingers. If Rayon's interview goes as well as mine, we'll both have sponsors lining up for us. Surviving the Games would be a piece of cake after that. At least, I hope.
