~ July 21st, 2010, 00:34 ~
I wake up at midnight crying. A lot. It was a nightmare. And the worst part of it all is what it was about. It was about me last year, when I had body issues.
The whole nightmare was me, trapped in my bathroom mirror, watching my old self while she was throwing up. I tried to get out of the mirror, I tried to stop myself, but nothing worked out. I had to watch me doing that to myself. I had to watch me throwing up.
That was the worst nightmare I've ever had in my entire life.
I start sobbing loudly as I run to my phone and search for Zain's numer. I don't care if he's sleeping, I need him, I really do.
After some time, I finally hear his voice through the phone.
"Hi babygirl, why did you- wait, are you crying?"
"Yes Zain, I am. I need you. I really need you right now."
"Pricess, try to stay calm, I'm already leaving my room."
"Okay. I-I'll try."
"Good."
And he hungs up.
I think I'm having a panic attack. I'm not sure, tough. I never had one.
I start to fear everything, and right now, I think I'm about to lose it.
I start shaking, a lot. I'm really scared.
That's when I hear the doorbell ringing.
I don't know why, but instead of making me feel safer, I start having a mental breakdown.
I start sobbing uncontrolably, I start to freak out.
I can't stop myself, I can't control my feelings anymore.
The doorbell rings uncontrolably, and I think it woke my parents up. It just makes everything worse.
I'm scared. I'm scared of my parents. I'm scared of Zain. I'm scared of myself. I'm scared of everything.
My knees are so weak that I end up falling to the ground.
I hear footsteeps at the stairs and the sound of keys.
I'm so scared, I'm so afraid of everything, every sound, every little detail.
I hear my father's voice, and Zain's as well.
I'm so afraid that my heart starts beating really fast, and I think that I'm gonna die.
I feel so weak and scared, I don't even know why.
I hear my mother's voice.
I start shaking a lot harder.
I hear footsteeps next to my door, and I feel like I'm passing out.
As soon as I see their faces, everything is black.
~ July 21st, 2010, 04:19 ~
My eyes open slowly, as I wonder where I am.
"Baby, you woke up"
I hear Zain's voice as I feel his warm arms around me. I hug him back, as I look around. The room is dark, but not too much. I'm in a hospital.
"Where are my parents?"
I ask as soon as I realize they're not here.
"Your father took you to the hospital and went back home. He needs to work tomorrow, so he simply asked me to look after you and left. Your mother left with him, but she calls me every single hour to ask if you're okay. She told me that she tried to sleep, but she only slept for forty minutes. She said she couldn't stop thinking about you."
"What time is it?"
"Nineteen past four."
"What happened?"
"You had a panic attack, and then passed out."
"Oh my God."
I say as I look to the sky outside my window. The sun is halfway out, and the sky is a beautiful shade of orange (almost yelow). I never knew how beutiful the sky looked at 4am in an hospital room. I just realize I'm crying when I feel the tears streaming down my face.
He hugs me tight.
"Don't worry, it's gonna be okay."
"You always say that."
"And if you're here now it's because it always ended up okay."
"No, Zain, it's because it never ended up the worst way."
I say as the nurse comes in the room.
"Good morning miss Swift."
"Good morning."
"Well, I think you already know what happened. You had a panic attack. But it was very strong. Stronger than the usual. You were dehydrated as well, and that's the reason why you are on IV. It was so strong you passed out after. Your parents said you never had a panick attack, but I guess that's something only you could say."
"That's true. I never had one before today. It was terrifying."
"Well, I guess you're really tired. I think you need some sleep."
"Yes, I'm tired, thank you for telling me everything, now I really need to sleep."
"You're welcome. That's my job. Sorry if I'm bothering you, but I need to take your IV off." [A/N: english is not my first language and I'm not really sure if that's how you guys say that.]
"No, it's okay."
She takes it off and puts a band-aid on the little dot of blood the IV made.
She walks out of the room as Zain holds my hand.
"You didn't get any sleep since I passed out, did you?"
"No, actually."
"I love you."
"I love you too, but you really need to rest."
"Yes, I do."
"Sleep well."
"I will, with you by my side."
I lay back down and he kisses my cheek slowly, as I close my eyes.
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Exactly 893 words.50 VIEWS ON MY BOOK YAY
IT'S TIMEE TO THROW A CHOCOLATE MILK PARTY!
BYE FAM
See ya ;)
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The Story Of Us #wattys2016
FanfictionOh, I'm scared to see the ending Why are we pretending this is nothing? I'd tell you I miss you but I don't know how I've never heard silence quite this loud [...] This is looking like a contest Of who can act like they care less But I liked it bett...