Roman, I Love You

Second Time Around

2

The next morning was hell. I wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep and never wake up. It was physically painful. I surveyed the mess I made the night before, and then I dejectedly put everything back in its place. As I pulled on a pair of pants, I was fully cognizant of the other scars that did not spell words yet had their own stories littered all over the mass of my thighs.

The drive to my parents was depressing to say the least. Every time I had to go I dreaded it, but after last night I was in no state of mind to see them. I pulled up to my childhood home and Jamie was outside with my mother. Déjà vu hit me like a freight train from when I was young and all three of us used to play in the front yard together. Just before it all went to shit and my shyness had not ruined my life. The blast from the past ended when little Jamie spotted my car and started towards me. Hopping out of the car, I immediately crouched down to catch him in my arms. He clung to my neck and wrapped his little legs around me.

"Auntie Scarlett!" He squealed in my ear.

"Hey, handsome. I sure am happy to see you baby-boy." I told him honestly.

"I'm happy to see you too!" He grinned big and toothy.

I stood up as my mother joined us. She beamed at me, "Good afternoon, sweetie. Oh honey, I really do hate when you put your hair in a ponytail."

"Good afternoon to you too Mother." I murmured while I bent over to grab Jamie's bag.

"Your father is home." My mother informed me.

I sighed and leaned over Jamie, "You wanna go say goodbye to Grandpa with me?"

He nodded a bit more subdued. I picked him up in my arms and carried him inside. My father was planted firmly in his seat like always with the TV on.

"Hey Dad," I greeted leaning down to let Jamie hug him and give him my own.

He reached forward and fingered my stomach. "Getting squishy." He laughed with a grunt.

"Well I'm going to head out now. I have to get Jamie back home."

His response was another grunt.

I made our way back outside and strapped Jamie into his car seat before getting back into the front. The ride home was filled with his high voice telling me about his night with Grandma and Grandpa.

"Grandma told me that I was her little prince! Auntie Scarlett, if I'm a prince, will you be my princess?" He asked.

My throat closed up and sudden tears stung at the back of my eyes as I looked into the rear view mirror at him. I was taken aback by the words his uncle had uttered when we were little kids. I took a minute to readjust myself and focus my attention back on the road. I blinked hard a few times to push the water back.

"Auntie Scarlett?"

"Oh, um yeah honey, maybe one day."

His face lit up and he bounced in his seat with untainted joy that pained me to watch.

We arrived home and as soon as I opened the front door Jamie bolted in screaming about princes and princesses. Avery leaned on the doorway to the kitchen smiling.

"Mommy, mommy! I'm going to be a prince and Auntie Scarlett is going to be my beautiful princess!" He told her before latching onto her legs.

She reached down and rubbed his back, "Oh really now." She fixed me with a look of amusement.

"What is all this talk of princes and princesses?" Nat's voice sounded from the stairs as he came down them.

He was buttoning the wrists of his blue button down that matched the color of his eyes. The front of his shirt was still undone and gently flapping as it caught the air. He reached the bottom and made his way towards me. Nat hugged me and pressed his lips to my cheek. His smell was intoxicating and I good-naturedly pulled away quickly. He stood next to me as he finished buttoning up his shirt then made his way over to Jamie. He let go of his mother and ran over to his father who swung him up in his arms.