Wings

Chapter 14: Conflict and Confusion

I had a new spring in my step as I left the infirmary, heading down the hall to go find someone to share the good news with. Should it be Perrie and Nessa, or Harry? I knew that Perrie and Nessa would be in the kitchens at this time while I had no idea where Harry was so I decided on telling the girls, not wanting to wait too long to share.

"Nessa!" I called as soon as I walked through the swinging door to the hot kitchens. I could see her dark hair plaited down her back as she stood over a stove.

"Kari, fancy seeing you back in the kitchens, I thought you'd been scared off for good," she said, her energetic voice easily reaching my ears over the clatter of the kitchen workers around us.

"Well I'm not back to help," I informed her, "I just couldn't wait to tell someone: I can start training tomorrow!"

"Wow Kari, that's awesome!" Her words should have held happiness but they were flat, lifeless. She was being unenthusiastic about the news.

"What's wrong with that?" I asked her, sensing disapproval.

"Well it's just that...women don't fight, we let the men and boys do that, they go do the dangeorus stuff and we just keep the place running. You should really work in the kitchens, figure out how to cook here where it's much safer."

I couldn't believe her. Those words had not just left her mouth.

"Ness, that's not how it works. Before The Demise, women were working as guards at the castle and doing laboreous work and no one batted an eye, people could work as whatever they wanted!" It was true, the world before Strazier had provided boundless oppurtunities for both sexes to pursue whatever career they wanted.

"But that was when things were peaceful," Nessa said as though she was explaining this to a small child. "Now there is real danger and the dress up and role playing is over. Just let the men do the dangerous stuff they should be handling and be a women and work at the things we can do."

"Are you suggesting that women are only good for cooking and sewing?"

"No but that's what we can do here to be helpful."

"So me going on raids wouldn't be helpful?"

"I don't know, I've never seen you fight or anything but a man would probably be more helpful to The Recovery."

I couldn't believe her right now, I was livid. I was not going to be stuck inside this hotel for, perhaps, the rest of my life making beef stew. I closed my eyes for a moment and took a deep breath.

"I just don't want you to get hurt and, as a friend, I am telling you that you should join the other women here in the kitchen," Nessa dared continue.

"I don't have time for this bullshit," I snapped, spinning on my heel and heading back out the door through which I had come. It swung shut behind me as I strode across the dining hall and out into the corridor. I looked right and left down the long passage lit by gas lights before going right, towards the lobby. I needed to just get away for a bit and it was the only place I could think to go.

When my boots hit the marble floors beneath the vaulted ceilings and grand chandelier, I stopped my persistent and heavyily footed march of frustration. The sudden silence caught me off guard and I just stood, collecting my venemously spewing thoughts for a moment.

With a heavy sigh, I unfolded my wings, happy at the wonderful stretch upon their unraveling, and let them flow behind me as I strode across the room, coming to stop in the shadows beyound the sunlight from the windows above.

I zoned out, eyes glazing over, as I went over the conversation with Nessa again in my head. Why was she so dead set on me not fighting? What was her logic behind that? Perhaps there isn't any females who choose to fight in The Recovery but that doesn't mean there couldn't be and Simon already said he was fine with me participating in raids. I breathed a long breath out of my nose as I closed my eyes, trying to let my frustration go, knowing I was perhaps over reacting.