YOU KILLED ME

Entry #1: I'm not broke. I'm just a broken-hearted man.

I'm not  his princess,

I'm just a chess piece.

How I wish I can be the queen,

Of the well known king.

But in this so called game,

I was just a pawn,

That can save by anyone,

By the knight to king,

Or by a same pawn.

I act as bait,

In order to make a checkmate.

Who am I to you?

A simple soldier, a personnel.

Contradict to mine,

You are my pawn,

Who become a rook,

That became a bishop,

Turned to a knight,

And now the king of my life.

It was just a chess game,

And when a checkmate came,

I lost everything.

"Chesslife"

He's my everything but he kills me everyday.

Who is he?

A not so cool guy, a man full of himself, a man having an age around mine. He is my everything while his everything is someone else. He's is my king while he's chasing for his queen. Funny to others but painful to me. Am I like you? Well, congratulation to those stupid people like me, we're loving  a person even though they're loving someone else too.

Ironically speaking we're all stupid idiots invade by love. A word that's hard to define. A  word having a powerful emotion in humans mind and heart. It can destroy everything or everyone in a second and can spare us from dying. See how powerful it is? It also can make a person cry and eventually smile.

Funny things happens when love came but when it vanished, everything would crashed and you can feel the word "sadness". It may cause pain. Afterwards a depression, and all of a sudden, you feel weak. You feel like dying. You feel everything to be nothing....

Oh I forgot to tell you his name. It was Ken, and he left me hanging.

I'm I too bad to not be love? or too kind to be left alone? or maybe I'm just ugly.

---

Pressured.

Emotions.

The feeling of missing my friends and family, then you came to save me.

That was the first time we meet.

The first time I realize I am worth to be love and worth to be everything in someones name, in someones eyes, in someones nature.

You shouldn't enter my life.

I shouldn't meet you.

I shouldn't care.

and..

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I shouldn't love you.

"Going back to the corner where I first saw you,
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag I'm not gonna move,
Got some words on cardboard got your picture in my hand,
Saying if you see this girl can you tell her where I am,
Some try to hand me money they don't understand,
I'm not, broke I'm just a broken hearted man,
I know it makes no sense, but what else can I do,
How can I move on when I'm still in love with you."

[ The Man Who Can't be moved by: The Script]

 This would be the last time that I'll see this place.

I will never go back here.

I will never see this place.

You will never see me again.

Eanna, July 2016

Somewhere in Neverland.