The Day Will be Longer than You Think

1: The Golden Primadonna

  So here it is, it's been a few months in the making and I am so excited. To start off I have to say that this story was inspired by the song, Primadonna Bill. I do not own that song or Gravity Falls. The song that Bill dances to is Death of a Bachelor by Panic! At The Disco. Enjoy!

Death of a Bachelor: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R03cqGg40GU

Update July 2017: The Primadonna Bill Song was made private and I had to replace it.

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Dipper sat in the car, tapping his foot rapidly, waiting for his sister to bring them to a gut-lurching stop in the parking lot. Damn it, the three scoops of that bright neon ice cream from earlier wasn't helping him get through Mabel's hellbent driving.

He felt like he was going to cover the dashboard in slightly less neon colored vomit if he had to deal with any more of it. He let Mabel pull him into the drag show; his feet dragging on the pavement of the hot parking lot on the way there. The sun was high and the air was muggy- it didn't help his nerves.

"If you don't hurry your shoes might melt to the pavement," she said in a sing song tone.

"Oh god I don't want to do this," he said as they reached the entrance.

"Well, you're gonna," Mabel answered, pulling out her wallet to pay the man at the entrance.

"This is weird," he said, as she grabbed the front of his shirt and continued to pull him inside.

"We aren't exactly normal people, Dipper," she answered with a cocked eyebrow. Her rainbow earrings swayed as she walked. It occurred to him that she seemed to fit in here, but he, with his worn beige t-shirt and dirty shorts, appeared like a shit stain on a rainbow sweater.

"What if someone we know is in there?" he asked.

"Then they would be hypocrites to say anything to us," she answered.

They walked toward the seats through a small crowd of people, and Dipper wanted to turn around and walk back out of the building when he saw the front row was nearly empty.

"Oh look, front row seats!" said Mabel, skipping as she walked. It was an astounding feat to drag someone while skipping, but who better to pull it off than Mabel.

"God, I hate you," he said, as she wrestled him into the seat; staying completely composed while doing it.

"You promised that you would do whatever I wanted," she retorted, pointing a finger at him with her eyebrows raised.

"You would have made me come here whether I had said that or not, regardless of some stupid bet," he stated, matter-of-factly.

"The fact of the matter is that you and Casey didn't last, and I called it," she said.

"Well it looked like me and her would last until Christmas when we made the bet," said Dipper.

She didn't respond to him that time. He grumbled and crossed his arms. The people wandering around had started to find seats when Mabel grabbed his ear and pulled him out of his slouch.

"Hey, these people work really hard, you should be polite and sit up. You are going to clap and at least pretend to have fun," she hissed.

"What are you? My mom?" he asked.

She let go of him, and he took to rubbing his sore ear and straightening his baseball cap. Dipper sighed, brought his arms to his sides, and put his best poker face on to cover the embarrassment as he focused his gaze on the curtains.