Gryffindor common room was a mess. Ever since Umbitch had posted the new rule on the bulletin board of the Gryffindor common room everyone was going ballistic.
"That fucking spawn of a dementor! What kind of rule is that!? How am I going to tell Katie?" Someone in Gryffindor yelled.
The rule on the bulletin that everyone was complaining about was as shown.
Educational degree No.46
Students of the opposite sex are not permitted to be within 5 inches of eachother.
The fact that the rule was was posted a week away from Valentine's day only heightened the students rage at the pink toad of a woman. Every student at Hogwarts was shocked and furious.
Except for Dean Thomas. His boyfriend, Seamus Finnegan was freaking out with all the rest of the student body and was stunned to see Dean smirking.
"What are you smirking for? I had our date on Valentine's day all figured out and now it's ruined! Thanks to that stink'in toad, I can't even kiss you without that goddamn "inquisitorial squad" all up on my ass!" Dean laughed at his boyfriend and kissed him.
"Seamus, do you know any other same sex couples at Hogwarts?" Dean asked. Seamus looked confused at the question.
"Of course. There's Harry and Malfoy, Lavender and Parvati, Crabbe and Goyle, Neville and Zambini and a lot more that I don't know. What does that have to do with anything?" Dean smirked again.
"The rule said opposite sex." Seamus face palmed himself.
"I'm a bloody idiot. Why didn't I think of that?" Dean laughed and kissed him again.
"Because I'm the smart one." He said smugly. Seamus snorted.
"Yeah. Your also the bottom." Dean blushed.
"Oh hush up. Anyway, call every lgbt couple at Hogwarts and tell them to meet up at the room of requirement. I have a plan."
***
Later that week all the lgbt couples in Hogwarts were gathered into the room of requirement, which at the moment, had taken the shape of a large board room people had meetings in. No one except Seamus and Dean knew why they were there.
When the said couple arrived there were many questions. All asked by a certain bushy haired Gryffindor girl.
"Why are we here? Why are we in a board room? Are we having a meeting? What about? Why didn't you tell us the reason of the meeting when Finnegan sent us all those notes that went up into flames? Why is it that other than me, only the same sex couples are attending this meeting? What's going on? I want to know what's going on!" Hermione demanded. Everyone rolled their eyes as Hermione started shooting out rapid fire questions as usual. But all of them were wondering the same things. Why were they here.
"Calm down Hermione. The reason you're here is because we think you're a good strategist and could be helpful in working with some things in the plan." Seamus replied.
"What's the plan then?" Draco Malfoy shouted.
"Good question. I'm too lazy to explain it though, so Dean you can tell them the plan." Seamus shrugged and leaned back on his chair. Dean rolled his eyes.
"Lazy asshole." He muttered punching Seamus on the arm. "But yeah okay. So the reason we're all here is because of Educational degree No.46." Everyone stopped goofing around and paid attention at those words. "As we all know, Umbridge has made a rule stating that 'students of the opposite sex are not permitted to be within 5 inches of eachother.' But when she made this rule, she missed one important thing." Dean looked at everyone expectantly but everyone just gave him a confused look. Seamus sighed in exasperation.
"We're gay! The educational degree said:'students of the opposite sex are not permitted within 5 inches of eachother!' Not members of the same sex!" Everyone in the room gasped at realizing the loophole.
"Thank you dear." Dean smiled at Seamus. Seamus glared at him and punched him in the shoulder.
"Don't call me dear asshat." Dean rolled his eyes.
"Fine. Last time I try to be romantic. Anyways, as my lovely boyfriend was saying, we're all gay so that means the rule doesn't apply to us. So now I have a plan. Umbridge is a homophobic bigots and she hates PDA, so what if we just started getting...steamy whenever she walks in the room!" Seamus snorted.
"Steamy? Gosh Dean you are so precious and innocent."
"Seamus we both know that's not true after last night." Seamus choked laughing. Everyone else just rolled their eyes at the couple.
"Okay yeah. That's great. We found a loophole. Huzzah. Now what? You just expect us to help the straights? What did they ever do to help us? Hell, some of them would agree with Umbitch if she made a rule against us!" A blonde haired Gryffindor yelled out at the back. A few students started nodding their heads and muttering in agreement. Until the student was met with one of the unlikeliest individual.
"Well yes! Of course we should help them nimrod! Yeah they're straight. So what? We help them anyways! Yeah, maybe there are a few idiotic bigots, but most of the straight people at Hogwarts stand up for us! Help us! And if we don't help them, we are no better than the bigots." Everyone turned and was shocked to see the speaker of the words was none other than Draco Malfoy. Harry smiled at him and kissed him.
"See here? This is my boyfriend!" Harry exclaimed proudly. The great Draco Malfoy blushed.
Everyone thought over Draco's words in silence and started to nod and murmur in agreement. The Gryffindor student turned red in anger.
"FINE! SURE! HELP THEM! Whatever. I'm out of here!" He stormed out of the room in fury.
"Everyone get out! He might get Umbridge! Get out! Get out!" Hermione ushered everyone out of the room.
***
Fortunately for the lgbt students of Hogwarts, the boy did not tell Umbridge, thanks to some threateni- er 'words of wisdom' from Crabbe and Goyle.
Umbridge never found out. Until the next day when all gay hell broke loose.
**********
An: I hope I didn't sound like a whiny straight person writing this. I'm really whiny, but I'm not straight.
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The Rules *Completed*
FanficUmbridge makes a new rule prohibiting a male and female from being within five feet of eachother... but she never thought of the gay wizards.
