Love again, Pain again

1

             

      I've always been boy crazy. I've had a crush from time to time. Nothing ever works out for me though. I don't know if it's something I'm doing wrong or if it's just me. I keep telling my self, "Anggie, it's okay. There's a perfect guy out there for you. You're just not looking hard enough. " I would say that over and over again. Did it ever come true? No. Would I like it to come true? Yes. But every time I fall in love, I get hurt. Guy's wonder why it's so hard to get girls but they haven't realized yet that it's because we know there going to hurt us.
   Back to the begging. I have had a lot of crushes. I'm a 15 year old girl going into high school. So I guess I'm normal. So many girls get every guy they want and they become so happy. But me? No. I'm stuck with the horny guys who only like me for my body. It's okay though. It really is. I've gotten used to it. I'm used to guys looking at me. In a way that I want? No. I want a guy to look at me and see my glow and automatically fall in love with me, but instead they stair at my boobs and ass and will use a cheesy pick up line to try to get into my pants.
    High School is starting now and I hope that there will be some half way decent guys who love me for me. Not because what I look like or what I have. I just want to find that one guy who will make me literally fall for him. I want that guy who is like Kyle. He hurt me too though. But oh, did I fall in love with him.
     From the second when he said hello, he opened my eyes up and I was ready to give him the key to my heart. Every Time we talked my heart would stop beating because I was so nervous. And when my heart was beating it would beat fast. We were just friends at first but you know how that goes. Kyle and I started talking. The more we talked, the more I feel in love. Then it slept out," Kyle, I love you. " He smiled, but he didn't say anything back. Maybe he loves me too or maybe he doesn't love me and he just didn't want to break my heart. Ugh. This is too confusing. Then Kyle sits me down. He tells me he has to tell me something and I remember thinking," oh great. Things are already ending before they even started. "