Gay! GAY GAY GAY! Wait..
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Dave left an hour ago, and I lay on the couch casually ashing my cigarette onto the floor. Rob will be pissed. But fuck it. I'm too busy thinking about Rob.
Dave thought Rob was gay.
And he had many valid points. I raise my eyebrows to no one but myself.
In all our friendship, I've never seen Rob do anything with a girl. Maybe a peck here and there. But it's mainly just him making... Him hinting at the fact he got some.
And he does lives with me for fuck's sake.
He befriended the gay couple in his art class? Art class. Come on, wait straight man takes art? Ones looking to get laid. And yet I meet no girls from this class, just two good looking guys. One of which he ends up messing around with. I add another notch to the 'gay' side in my mental list.
But he's never liked guys. I think. He's never told me he liked guys. And I'm his best friend. I think.
No, I know I am. So he would tell me. There's no reason not to. I am gay, so he couldn't have worried about me having a problem with it.
But then, maybe he finds me so disgusting he didn't want me to know in case I'd try to get with him. That's depressing, so that's not the case.
Maybe he doesn't want me to know because he's secretly in love with me and doesn't want to find out I don't feel the same. Never mind the fact all I fucking do is make jokes with him about us doing something. I'm constantly touching him, sitting in his lap and such. I glance up in time to see Rob walk in.
"I thought we said we - oh my god, please tell me you're not ashing on the floor."
Well. Another notch on the gay side.
"I'll vacuum."
"Yeah, you will." Rob dropping his bag to the floor, walking to grab an ashtray and placing it on my stomach. He points to it. "Ashtray. You ash in it. Nifty thing, really."
I raise an eyebrow, moving my hand to ash in the ashtray. "Nifty?"
"It's been a long day."
"Tell me, are you gay?"
"..What?"
"Tell me about your day. Fuck. Ever heard of listening? Nifty thing, really." The key is keeping a straight face, but not overly so.
Rob rolls his eyes, shoving my legs off the couch, and sitting.
"Just stupid and long and frustrating, I guess. Joe kept bothering me all day. Trying to get me to take his side. I guess him and Mike are breaking up."
I can't help it, and chuckle softly.
"It's not funny Brad. We ruined their relationship."
"20 bucks they'll be back together before two weeks is up." I believe Dave. Maybe that's my mistake, but I do.
"This is not something to bet over. What is with you?"
"Then take the bet. And don't get involved, okay?"
"Fine. What did you do today?"
"Dave stopped by." I start, moving my legs to his lap. He leaves them alone, nodding to me. "So I talked to him for awhile. And that's about it. Tell me more about your day."
Rob looks at me for a moment.
"Why so interested in my day?"
"You're my best friend." That shut him up. "And I'm curious what a day in the life of Rob is like."
Not that I'm digging or prying to find out A) what that little thing is, and B) if he doesn't indeed have it.
"Just went to my first class, and it was boring and useless as hell."
"What class?"
"Something to do with English. Short stories or something. I don't really know." Hmm... Tough, but I'm saying that's a straight action, and comment. I nod, trying to show interest. But this is new for me.
"And then walked to my next class, while I chatted with this girl." Ugh, straight.
"She's a sweetie-" Gay! "Wanted me to go shopping with her-" Gay! "But I'm not really into shopping with some girl." ..Straight.. "Why'd you sigh?"
Because you were suppose to say, 'so I was like, sounds super, sweetie!'
"Hmm?" I question, looking up to him. "Oh. Just I need to go shopping, need new shoes. But I suppose since you're not really into shopping with some girl, you wouldn't want to come with."
I don't need nor want shoes. I hate shopping for shoes. Luckily for me, lies just seem to spill out of my mouth, leaving little time to question. He chuckles, and I smile.
"I would, actually. Feels like forever since we did something together outside the house." I tilt my head. Gay?
"Don't look so shocked."
"No, I was just thinking. You're right." Again. Lie. Don't we always do things?
"I'm sorry, did you just say I was right about something?" I fight the urge to kick him, and instead stare at his grin. He has nice lips. He's always had nice lips. Thought that since I first met him. Even better when he wets his bottom lip slowly. Wait.
Wait.... I quickly look from his lips to his eyes, and he's looking at me. Gay!
GAY GAY GAY! That was SO gay!
My eyes are probably wide as they can be, and I have to work hard to not seem as excited as I just might be. Now would the perfect time to continue the conversation as if nothing happened, if only I could think of what we were just talking about. Play it off, play it off... No... No, don't grin at him. Stop that! Play it off!
"So when did you want to go?"
"I'm done with classes for today. You up for it?"
Hell yes.
"Well, I was going to lie around a while longer, but I suppose I could get up."
Was it gay? Or did he just need to wet his lips?
"I'm going to change first. That cool?"
How many times has he licked his lips in my presence? Millions, I'm sure. Maybe I'm trying to dig too deep. It couldn't have meant anything.
"Brad?"
"Yeah. Change. Cool."
This isn't good. What if now I pick up on every little thing he does that he's always done. But I think he's doing it on purpose. Everyone wets their lips. It just happens. But he was looking at me.
"Brad."
I'm sure I would have noticed something like that before. Right? You're straight best friend seducing you. Slowly and teasingly at that. But he was just wetting his-
"Brad!" Rob said, shoving my legs roughly.
"Hmm?"
"Could you maybe move your legs so I could go change?" I drop my legs, moving to sit up. "And put some shoes on. It won't take me but a minute."
I'm suddenly not in the mood to go anywhere with him.
