Hey everyone so what I had in mind for this book was for it to be very interactive and relatable to people so please feel free to leave me your comments and suggestions in the comments down below. I look forward to hearing from you guys and thank you for taking a look at my first book and for giving me the time of day.
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I don't wanna go another day,
So I'm telling you exactly what is on my mind.
Seems like everybody's breaking up
Throwing their love away,
But I know I got a good thing right here
That's why I say (Hey)
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The beginning chords and lyrics of the Pussycat Dolls filled my ears as I listened to my phone on my way home from work. I started humming along as I drove through the night down the mostly quiet freeway.
Nobody gonna love me better
I must stick with you forever.
Nobody gonna take me higher
I must stick with you.
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you, my baby.
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you.
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A memory came over me and I ran with it seeing as there was no other option but to relive it until it was over.
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My mother in the living room calling to me as I lay in my bedroom.
"Charlie, could you come here please?"
"COMING!"
I shouted back at her, sighing, I rolled out of my bed and walked the short distance to the living room. It really wasn't that far. Our house was really small, just two bedrooms, the living room and kitchen to house all 5 of us. Me, my two younger brothers and sister and my mom. My sister and I shared a bedroom and my two younger brothers shared the other room while my mom slept out on the couch in the living room. It wasn't ideal but I liked it simply because it was the longest time we had stayed in one place and I had a bed which was a bonus.
"Which song is your favorite?" She asked me. Then proceeded to play two different songs off of YouTube from the laptop that was sitting on her lap.
I don't remember what the first song was but the second, Stickwitu by the Pussycat Dolls, stuck with me simply because at 14 I liked it and because it sounded familiar to me although I didn't quite know why at the time.
"That one is my favorite." I said as she continued to listen to Stickwitu. "Why do you want to know?" I asked.
"I'm thinking of singing karaoke at a bar I'm going to with my friends tonight."
Her reply made my stomach drop. I was still trying to delude myself when it came to my mom at 14 going on 15. Call it a coping mechanism or whatever but I knew what that meant in the back of my mind even as I made myself not think about it so that I wouldn't expect the worst from her and so I wouldn't have to deal with the hurt. It meant she would be gone all night long and maybe all morning long as well, depending on how well or bad her night went. This mean leaving me and my younger siblings alone all night. Leaving me to take care of them in the morning before school. Leaving me to make sure they were dressed and on the bus. Leaving me.
I didn't realize this at the time though. I couldn't allow myself to realize this because I knew deep deep down what this meant. I knew what her going to sing Karoake meant but at 14 going on 15 I wasn't old enough, or mature enough or ready enough to allow myself to realize this and deal with the pain and I definitely wasn't strong enough to face the consequences of knowing what this meant and the actions that would need to be taken.
So instead I nodded in ignorance and told her I thought that song would be better for her because she had a higher voice and it would match well with her and be easier for her to sing.
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I snapped out of the memory as the song started to end. I couldn't bear to hear the last few notes of the song so I grabbed my phone which was sitting in the passenger seat of my car plugged into it's auxiliary cord and hit the next button. Waiting to hear which song came next.
Waiting in a car
Waiting for a ride in the dark
The night city grows
Look at the horizon glow
I turned it up. I turned it up as loud as I could without blowing out my car speakers and tried to drown out the memories of mother. So that's how I drove home that night, trying to drown out and run away from the memories that threatened to consume me, from the pain that followed me everywhere I went, around every corner, threatening to consume me.
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Ok so the two main songs featured in this beginning chapter are Stickwitu by the Pussycat Dolls and Midnight City by M83.
If you havn't heard of any of these songs before then please feel free to check them out and tell me what you think of them. If you have heard them before then take another listen and list your favorite parts of the song or what part you like best down below. I personally would listen to Midnight City over Stickwitu any day all day long but that's just my preference. Thanks guys!!!
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One More Time
RomanceCharlie is your average girl, a regular Jane Doe if you will plus 60 pounds. She has dreams, a job, friends (well... a friend) and a loving family. It wasn't always like this though and she often finds that her past can be difficult to shake off. El...
