Soft Silence | ✓ | unedited

Chapter Two ⌔ Deep Breaths

Chapter Two ⌔ Deep Breaths

My mouth dropped open and I shoved myself away from Eric, putting as much distance between us as I could without bringing the frantic nurses within my line of vision. I heard Lisa's voice -she was talking quickly to them. There was a quick conversation and then there was silence. I didn't look up at Eric as I brought my hand up and roughly rubbed my eyes to get rid of the stupid tears that had welled up.

"Sierra?" Eric spoke softly. I didn't meet his eyes which I knew were filled with the hurt and blankness I could hear in his voice. All the pain would be reflected in those blue eyes. He wouldn't see me anymore.

He wouldn't see his goddaughter. No.

He would see her.

It was painful knowing that I was the reason no one would see them anymore. My heart throbbed painfully and a lump formed in my throat. I didn't have to worry about having to speak anymore; I couldn't.

Instead of taking my life away, God took away my voice instead. Exactly how was I supposed to survive, now?

There were light footsteps and then I saw Lisa reach out to touch my shoulder. I cringed away from her touch and left her hand hanging in mid-air.

More silence.

"Sierra, are you okay?" Lisa asked quietly. I kept my eyes on my shoes, refusing to look up at her.

No, I wanted to scream at her. I was definitely not okay.

Why would anyone think I was okay? Did I look okay to them? Did I look like I was about to jump with joy?

I clenched my jaw and took a deep breath through my nose, nodding slightly. I didn't need them hovering around me all the time. I didn't need them around me at all.

I just didn't.

I turned away, wanting to get away from them and from everything I was forced to suffer. I ignored Lisa as she tried to catch my hand and continued to make my way outside the hospital, not daring to look at anyone.

Would their eyes be filled with pity or hate?

My chest burned and I felt like there was a gaping hole growing on my heart, slowly killing me. It would have been a relief for me.

"Sierra!" Lisa called out to my retreating back. When I made no move to stop, she called out again but in a more tired voice, "Text us when you're ready to come home."

Home?

I wanted to laugh. What home? Home was where they were. They weren't here anymore, though. So my home wasn't here anymore, either.

I left the hospital and stood on the steps, staring at the greenery around me.

There was a time when I found the luscious green forest beautiful and inviting. Now, I just found them green. Too green, maybe.

Instead of making my way back to the cold and empty house where I lived, I found myself walking in the opposite direction, making my way towards the place where it happened. It took me half an hour to get to the bridge that was currently empty of any living soul besides myself.