A Dreamer's Failures (What I Can't Have)

16. New Confident

Wednesday, the middle of the week, and so many things had happened.

I broke up with Nathan, Lauren rebelled against me, I met Jason, and now I like him. Not including the minor things like what Taylor did or told me yesterday, well I don't know if I should call it a minor yet.

While driving to school, I looked at all the details of the outside throughout the window, all the trees and roads, where we've already been and what we'll pass next. All of that gave me peace, including the almost complete classical music that was playing on the radio. 

"Clair, are you ok sweetie?" My dad stared at me with his worrying look while driving. I was already used to it considering that he always worries and he always tries his best to protect me, more than I actually need. 

"I'm fine." I kept starring at the window, and although I couldn't see my dad, I could sense he was more worried than before, why does he care so much?

"Are you sure?" He was searching for answers, he always does that hoping he will get them someday, I don't know why I don't trust him.

"Dad, I'm fine I promise, just concentrate in driving." This time I turned my eyes to him, what I just said sounded rude and disrespectful, more than I wanted it to be. I mean, he doesn't deserve this, he just wants to see me happy.

"I'm sorry, that was rude." I apologized

"Don't worry darling, but can you please tell me what's wrong, it's obvious that you are not fine."

Should I tell him? I mean, he's my dad, he's one of the few people that truly love me and want to see me happy everyday, he's one of the reasons I'm still here...

"Fine, I'll tell you." This is a historic day.

"Ok."

There are a lot of things I need to tell him, they're countless. But he asked for what's wrong in this moment, so I guess I need to tell him about Nathan, Lauren and... Jason? I don't know if I should mention that. My parents always bother and joke about the guy I like, and if I tell him and he founds out who he is, every single time he sees him, he'll say something like "Hey you, treat well my daughter." or even worse "Is he even worth it sweetie.". Common things to embarrass me, but don't all parents embarrass their kids? At least once?

"Ok dad, so I broke up with Nathan yesterday, and Lauren, a girl that's really mean and the worse definitely wants him, and she was my friend. But the worst of it, is that Taylor is probably in her side." It's relieving to get all of that out of my chest, and the best of it is that it's getting me closer to my dad.

"Who was this Taylor?" Or not.

"Dad! Are you kidding me? She's one of my best friends since, what, first grade?!" I can't believe he actually forgot, and is he, smiling? Who am I kidding, I love dad.

"Oh right right, sorry darling." He gave up a chuckle before continuing.

"Oh well, that means she's not so much of a best friend honey, because true friends will always support you. You need to talk about that with her." He coughed and cringed for the next question, an obvious one that discomforts me.

"And why did you two break up?" He turned his sight to the road and waited for my answer.

"That doesn't matter." I avoided that question at all costs. If he finds out that Nathan pushed me, he will literally get out of the car right now and go punch him in the face and break his nose, I'm not even joking.

One time when we were in Paris, some crazy and creepy negligent man started swearing towards Abby in French and he even touched her shoulder, the guy was messed up. My dad walked towards him with the most exasperated face I ever saw on him and planted his fist in his shoulder with the power to break his bone. From that moment, I knew he could protect the ones he loved no matter what happened.