∆ January..
I miss my friends.
One moved away and the other has a boyfriend. I still talk to the one that moved but currently I can't tell them my thoughts or what's going on with me at all. I'll get the usual response.
No.
Stop thinking that way. You are beautiful.
Nothing to be sad about.
Why?
Right now,I have not smiled since I "lost" both of my friends. I feel terrible even being near them. One would tell it like it is and the other barely noticed me anymore.
I'm coming off as a brat that needs constant attention. But really I just have a lot of anxiety, especially when it comes to being alone. My thoughts run wild assuming everything.
They don't like you anymore.
You're being replaced.
No one cares.
Whenever my friend was sat near me with her boyfriend, I was sat with my hateful thoughts. I contemplated suicide again,I wondered if anyone would care and who would. I considered going away and to let her do her thing and me do mine.
Some days were better than others.
I hit rock bottom and started planning out my suicide. I stupidly started writing a note that would go to my online boyfriend in my math class. When the bell rang I put it away with all of my other stuff and started to head out. Before I could leave a guy I've known since fifth grade said something nice to me and it made me smile. For the first time in months.
Finally.
DT 2.
