Confusion

Tuscany

Ella's POV

We arrived at the house in the middle of nowhere just green hills surrounding the house as far as my eyes could see. It was an old villa made of bricks but the interior was decorated with vibrant colours, and modern furniture that made it look like home. It was a two storey building with beautiful views. Unbelievable views. He had a outdoor pool which was bigger than my old apartment.
I felt hands around my waist and I leaned back
"So what do you think?"
"Its so beautiful so much beauty everywhere you look, I love it"
"Well its ours for a week with no interruptions just you and me baby, the only ones that know we are here are your brothers my pilot and Charlie"
"Oh my god, no one knows we are here alone"
He smiled at me "No one baby, so you can scream my name and no one would hear"
I slapped him "Always thinking dirty thoughts"
"So what do you want to do first"
Well I was feeling adventurous today
"Hmm..." I started walking to the pool area while taking off a piece of clothing as a I did "I've never gone skinny dripping..."
I look over for my shoulder to see Christian with the biggest smile on his face."well baby we better fix that now" I started laughing as I was running to the back of the pool by the time I got there I was still in my undies and bra, Christian was still in his jockey. He caught me and hugged me as he threw us both into the pool. When we hit the pool it was cold even though it was hot outside, as we surfaced I couldn't stop laughing. "Um why do you still have clothing on?"
" oh do I"
I removed the rest of my clothing he approached me and that was the first spot we christened in Tuscany.

We spent our days christening every room and surface of the house, we got lost in ourselves in bed, or rolling around in the hills, or my favourite folicking under the stars at night. He had bicycles we would ride now and then around the villa. We never adventured into town as everything was well stocked. And we were enjoying the time with just being with each other.

One night we were laying in front of the windows naked under a white sheet on the lounge floor, we had just finished making love and were admiring the stars through the windows.
"Baby on Friday night what was going through that beautiful mind of yours"
Why does he always do this to me give me the time of my life then bam he ask me straight froward questions I can't get out, like a game show I must answer the question, I have no more life lines. Or I will lose everything.
I look at him "I was just thinking about us" silence
"What about"
" Its really not that important it was just me being silly, can you please change the subject"
"Hmm you can tell me anything I will always be honest with you, I would never lie to you"
"Never?"
"Never baby"
I sit up now its my time to get some long awaited answers
"Would you leave me if you got sick of saving me"
"Wow okay that's what had you upset that night, you think I would be sick of you, and let you go"
"Yes"
He sits up looks me in the eyes
"I dont know"?
" oh"
" damnit" he starts to scratch his head as thinking how to say what comes next, my heart is beating so fast I feel like I've just been rejected over and over again
"Look what I mean is, I don't know if I would stay I've been known to move on, and I don't want to get your hopes up, but your different like I said before you never cared how much I had, you are the first to say I love you to me and mean it. And you are the only girl I have ever brought here. But reality is I was a player, I don't know any different. I know I don't want to lose you, I know I want to give you the world and I know I love you and if you can handle that I know I can too."
"Okay"
"Your upset by my answer"
"Yeah I kind of am, actually what happens if you mean more to me than you feel for me where does that leave us?"
"I don't know baby, but I do know for now things are perfect so lets not ruin it with things we can't control"
"Okay"

After Christian falls asleep, I grab his tshirt, blanket and wrap it around me I walk outside to the pool chairs and lay down on them looking at the stars and getting lost in the beautiful warmth of the air and bright lights of the stars above. So he admitted it he could leave me if he did get sick of saving me. I guess I just figured we had been through alot that he would stick around. But he is a millionaire he has more money than he can think of and he has a reputation to uphold.
"Hey"
I look up to see Christian standing there
"Move over"
So I do I slide to my side while he lays down next to me, I remain silent
"Your thinking about I said, I know it must of hurt you but I promise to always be honest with you"
"I know"
"But"
"Nothing, I was thinking maybe I'll go see my brothers for a bit, you know to give you space to get your work sorted and to be less of a burden on you"
"No your not leaving me I know what you are doing and no you are not going"
I don't understand I thought he would welcome the break from me.
"Your not going babe, I won't let you"
"I don't get you. You say you may not want to help I'm giving you the easy way out, why dont you just take it while you can"
"Because I also told you I love you and I'm not sick of you"
"Not yet your not"
"Will you stop twisting my words Ella, for fuck sake"
" You know what! dont take care of me, dont pretend you care when later on you will leave, lets just end this while we still can"
"NO because I was honest with you, I told you the truth I FUCKING LOVE YOU ELLA stop trying to convince me that I don't. ME and YOU are made for each other. Stop pushing me away because that shit hurts everytime you do that."
" I'm sorry I just dont want to wake up one day and you realise you don't want me"
"Baby I love you if I woke up one day and thought I don't love you it wouldn't be overnight and it wouldn't be on a wim it would be over time it would be something you did to me, don't you understand it would be you that has created my pain to leave, Linda wanted nothing but my money, the girl before her wanted my fame the girl before her wanted the fame the money not me. See don't you understand you haven't want anything from me. These girls never loved me like you loved me. I protect myself from being hurt by seeing their true colours and moving on to the next as to not feel the pain that in reality they never loved ME. So baby unless you do something to me I will LOVE YOU"
My poor baby why did they not see the real person underneath all those expensive suits was a beautiful caring man.
"I love you too"
We spent all night lost in each others embrace making love under the beautiful stars of Tuscany.
I will spend my lifetime proving to him that I love him.