Trying Too Hard [Bunny Love Story]

►Chapter Ten◄

Most of the time, a lot of people find themselves worrying and getting nervous over something that won't matter in less than a week. Naturally, I am one of those people. When the next morning had finally arrived, I spent the entire morning getting antsy over talking to Kenny. What if all that happened last night was some sort of dream and my brain just really hates me? While even I know that's not very likely, my adoration for him is something that was starting to cloud my common sense. After all those years of watching him from afar and wanting nothing more than for him to talk to me again like we were best buds, my wish finally came true. And now I'm not exactly sure on how to react. It really was just too good to be true, which was giving me doubt, which was why I was nervous.

The entire bus ride as I sat behind him, I tried to get myself to not stare at the back of his head. He didn't turn around even once to look at me, so the rest of the school day I kept an eye on him. I kept playing with the phone in my pocket, wanting to just walk up to him and give him my number. Obviously I didn't want it enough, or else I would've swallowed my fear and actually done it.

Even during lunch, when they were sitting around their usual table and chit chatting about this and that, Kenny didn't even spare me a glance. I continuously wondered if I had done something to irritate him, or if he had simply forgotten that last night ever happened. It wasn't until the end of the school day as I was walking to the bus stop did Kenny come up to me.

"Hey Butters," he greeted while following in step beside me.

Not actually expecting him to talk to me, I gave him an odd look. "Oh, uh, hi-a Kenny!" I responded, smiling a bit.

"You never gave me your number," he stated, hands in his pockets and glancing at me.

"Oh, gee, fella.. I'm sorry, I didn't wanna bother you or nothing so I just sorta left you alone. Should I have given it to ya earlier?" I asked him, knocking my knuckles together and staring at my feet as we walked.

Kenny shrugged his shoulders and took out his flip phone. "Nuh-uh, it's fine." He stopped talking while he opened the cellular device and pressed a couple buttons. "You can give it to me now."

"Right!" I hurriedly took out my own phone and went to where my number was listed. "555-288-8377." I watched as he punched it into his phone and then slide it back into the pocket of his jacket. I quietly put mine away as well. "So, uh, what do you do when you aren't pretending to look for yourself?"

Glancing around, Kenny shushed me. "No one can know that it's actually me, dude. Let's not talk about it so loudly," he told me. I frowned, but nodded along as if I were unaware of the lies he was feeding me. He cleared his throat as we got to our destination and began awaiting for the bus' arrival. "I just sort of hang out at home, I guess. Sometimes I go to parties, when I can get in for free. Other times I, you know.." he looked around to make sure no one was listening before leaning toward me and lowering his voice. "Vandalize." I swallowed a lump in my throat.

Why are you doing this to me?

"That sounds real fun," I stated with a short nod. He shrugged and straightened himself up just as the bus arrived. "Well, uh, I'll see ya tomorrow.." I got onto the bus and to my usual seat when Kenny following behind me. Instead of sitting somewhere else, though, he took a seat next to me. "Wh-where are the other guys?"

"Stan and Kyle have a date," sighed Kenny as he leaned back into the uncomfortable seats. "I think Cartman's planning some more traps for me or something."

I paused. "Wh-what kind of traps?" I slowly questioned him, watching his reaction closely.

Seemingly almost proud of himself, Kenny smirked and stretched an arm so that it was resting right behind me and on the head of our seat. "He said since he's not going out tonight, he might as well make sure those cameras are working and are well spread out to get a view of every street corner and large building," he explained.

"Is that s-so?" By this point my palms felt sweaty and I found myself avoiding any sort of eye contact with him, even if the color of his eyes were a truly beautiful shade of blue. A sort of blue that you found yourself drowning in.. Finding myself fantasizing once again, I mentally shook my head and turned to face Kenny. Instead of looking into his eyes, I stared at his eyebrows. "Well it's a darn good thing y-you're aware of all this!"

It's so hard to play along..

"Yeah," Kenny nodded in response and after a moment he took his arm away. Maybe someday I'd be able to cuddle up to him, to kiss him, to hug him.. To do anything romantic without him giving me the worst possible reaction. He'd probably never talk to me again if I were to directly confess my feelings. Which was why I was going to go out that night and finally finish my message. "This is my stop. I'll call you later."

"Bye Ken!" I responded, smiling at him as he stood up. He waved at me, a gesture that I quickly returned, and I watched him get off the bus and walk down the street to his home.

The way he walks is so.. hot.

Feeling my face heat up at such a thought, I tried to rid my mind of every sexual thought that would start to develop including Kenny. The rest of the ride home, I mentally called myself a good for nothing pervert.