One More Day

Chapter 4: Regret

"Why didn't you tell her?"

"I couldn't. I wanted to but I couldn't. When I first met her, her presence made me forget about my disease. It felt as if I never had cancer but yesterday when I kissed her, all of it came rushing at me." I replied, with sadness in my voice.

"I love her Mom. I can't hurt her with the truth; she would be heartbroken." I continued.

"And you think now she isn't." she replied.

She was right. I closed the door on her face, I heard her crying.

"Why did I do that?" I thought to myself, feeling down.

"There are times when you feel that you are doing the right thing by keeping someone in the dark but you are wrong." she explained.

"You have to let her in. Tell her about your disease. She will be hurt but at the same time she will be happy that you told her the truth."

"What if she hates me for not telling her before?" I asked timidly.

"If you really love her then let her decide what she wants to do."

I got up and hugged my mother for her support. It felt good to let all of my emotions out.

"Now go on, tell her." my mother told me.

I got my phone from my bed and called her. The call went to the message recorder.

"Hi Elise, it's me. If you are listening to this. I want to tell you that I am soo sorry for today. I wasn't myself. There is something important that I have to tell you which will clear every question you have in your mind about my uncanny behavior. Meet me in the park tomorrow at around 4 pm. I will wait for you. Please show up."

I ended the message.

"Let's have dinner. Cheer up." my mother said.

We went down to the dining room and my mother went into the kitchen to bring the food. This was the second time I ate food together with my family after my diagnose. We talked and I had a good time. I asked my parents to excuse me and I went up to my room. I sat down on the chair.

"What will I say to her?"

"How will she react when she finally gets to know the truth?"

These two questions kept floating through my mind, making me worried about tomorrow. I went and lay down on my bed and closed my eyes. They felt heavy but I could not sleep. It's like they weren't ready to rest till I had done something. Then suddenly I thought clicked my mind. I took out a few papers and a pen and started writing a letter. I knew that tomorrow I wouldn't be able to face her and tell her everything so I started writing it all down.

It took me a long time but I was able to complete it. I wrote all of it in details for her to understand. I was eagerly waiting for tomorrow. It was 2 am in the morning and I was still awake. But there was a change, now I felt light because as I put myself to the bed, it merely took a few minutes and I feel into a very deep sleep.

I woke up. Something was wrong. It didn't feel like my body did. It felt like I was away from my body. As I opened my eyes, I saw my mother crying in my father's arm and to my surprise Elise was there. She was holding the letter that I wrote. It was strange. I got up and went to her and called her name but she didn't respond. I did the same with my parents. I called out to them,

"What's wrong mother? Why are you all crying?"

She didn't reply.

I was fearful. It felt like a nightmare that I wanted to open my eyes from. But as I turned towards my bed to go back to sleep, I saw myself, lying on the bed, not breathing. My skin had gotten all pale. It was like the life from my body was slowly fading away. I could feel it. Then I heard Elise calling out to me. I could hear her as she called out to my body. She had read the letter because tears were falling down from her eyes now.

When I saw her crying face, a tear fell from my eye. I wanted to hold her, be there when she had read my letter but all I could do now was see her.

Suddenly, I felt something pulling me away from this. All of my life came flashing in front of my eyes.

"No, no please this can't be it. I didn't say my good bye. I didn't hug my mother. I didn't hold my Elise in my arms one last time. Is this how long my life was? Is this what I get? All I wanted was One More Day to be with them." I spoke.

Can't you hear me God? Can't I touch them, hug them just once. Can I not get one last chance?" I begged.

Everything went dark as I faded away from my body!

The End

(Find the letter on the next page)

The Letter:

My Sweet Elise,

I cannot begin to explain how sorry I am to not tell you about it before. The day I met you, I was at the hospital in the morning. I was diagnosed with brain cancer and was told by the doctor that I hadn't gotten long to live. I was hopeless and crushed. I tried to feel good but I couldn't. There were times that I wanted the pain to end.

Then something changed. You came into my life. I never thought but because of you I wanted to live. I hoped each night and I still do that I wake up to see you the next day.

The time I was with you, it felt as if all of my pain was gone. When we kissed, it all changed. I felt something in my heart but suddenly my head ached which made me remember my disease. I pushed you away because I didn't want to be there for a while and then not be there for you, forever.

When you came into my house to check up on me, I was amazed and filled with happiness. But I did not let you stay because I wasn't ok. I was at the hospital that morning too because I got sick again. It didn't feel right. You have no idea what I went through when I closed that door on you.

Now I can't keep lying to you. I just can't spend the rest of my days lying to the girl I like. The girl with whom I fell in love with.

I love you Elise and my heart will always love you till my last breath.

I can't wait to see you tomorrow, to be with you when you read this. I want to hold you, hug you and kiss you.

Love, Peter.