I'm Sorry I Loved You

Part 3

I first fell in love with you when we were 8 ,and I never stopped loving you Jason! I have always loved you! I remember the day you broke my heart. We were 11 then. I was going to tell you how mich I actually loved you, but you dropped that huge bombshell on me! It felt like somebody had just gone and stabbed me in the chest and stole my heart while they where at it! You really did hurt me Jason...

*Flashback*

Everyday... everyday that passes is like torture! not being Jason's and all... I mean I love him so much! where beat friends, but it's like he hardly even notices me anymore, he's always hanging out with the boys instead! Even though I see him everyday, I miss him. Today, I'm going to confront him and confess my love for him! I'll die If I don't!

I was on my way to science, ugh physics! when I passed Jase in the corridor.

"hey jase!" I said

"oh, um, h-hi Em" he replied nervously

"are you okay? I asked concerned

"umm, actually, Em, I need to talk to you about something"

"what is it Jase?"

"meet me in the corner of the playground at break time" he told me, and with that, he rushed off to his class.

I wonder what he wantw to tell me? he sounded pretty worried! I thought.

The next two classes before breaktime dragged on and on! but finally, the bell rang for breaktime.

I ran as fast as I could to the corner of the playground.

When I got there, Jase was already there, sitting on the ground playing with the dirt.

"hey" I said

he turned round

"oh, hey"

"actually Jase, I also have something to tell you" I told him, this was it! this was the moment I had been waiting for! he was gunna tell me he loved me and I was gunna tell him I loved him and then we will get married and have kids and live happily ever after! although unfortunately,  reality is never that simple.

"what is it," Jase asked

"you first!" I smiled

"oh, ok, well, umm, I , eer, well" Jase stutted nervously, he looked away sheepishly

"what is it jase? come on! you can tell me! were best friends remember, we tell eachother everything! there's no need to be nervous!" I reassured him.

"okay, well, umm, you see, the thing is" Jase was still nervous

"what Jase," I looked at him reassuringly

He took a deep breath.

"I'm Gay"

And that, Is when my whole world fell apart.

I was speechless and hearbroken.

"Em?"

"yea?"

"are you mad at me?"

"what? no! of course not jase" I spluttered

"oh good" he said relieved.

"erm, I just need to be alone for a minute, I'll see you later or something" I told hom quickly, I really needed to get away!

"wait! what did you wanna tell me?" he asked

"what? oh, eer, nothing! it doesn't matter, I'll see you later Jase!"

"oh, okay then, seeya Em!"

and with that I ran off, away from Jase, well away from everyone.

I hid in the toilets for the rest of the day as I couldn't bare to face Jason! I cried the whole time and used about every single tissue in the toilet block! I also cried myself to sleep that night.

I was in love with a gay person who was also my best friend!

oh god! what could be worse??

*End Of Flashback*

Oh Jase, If only you knew how much I loved you back then! If only you knew how much I still love love you right now! If only you knew how much I will always love you...