Poetry From A Broken Mind

Words Like Stone

The words you say
Fall like stones.
They resonate in my head
Like a phone's dial tone.

You accuse me
Of being a liar
Say I'm like everyone else
But I feel that's not what transpired.

You just wanted
To always talk sexual
After our first breakup
Which seemed undesirable.

You wanted me
To talk some kind of dirty,
And I didn't want to talk
About anything in that way.

Your words fell,
Having a weird weight.
It was foreign from you,
But familiar to this date.

I never expected this
To come from you;
After all, you broke me,
Leaving me to wonder what to do.

I loved you completely,
Unwaveringly the first time.
But after that, you seemed to show
That you may never have been mine.

I loved you wholeheartedly
The first round in this game;
But after that, you told me
That it was I to blame.

It was my fault,
I was the fake.
But what you didn't tell me was
It was me you were trying to shake.

Every word you said,
Every promise uttered,
Left me empty and
In a grave wonder.

Then I got worried,
Thought you were talking to another.
As it may turn out,
You and I shouldn't have been together.

Girls would say I'm free,
His friends are probably saying I'm an unworthy bitch;
I would have to agree with them,
My heart's love isn't like a switch.

You broke my heart,
Even if a little bit more
I can't jump back into loving you
After you walked out the door.

I trusted you
With my darkest secrets.
You let doubts take over
And treated us like rotted biscuits.

In the end of us the first time,
You treated me like an option.
So I decided to narrow down the choices
And remove myself from the equation.

Now you'll accuse me,
It'll all be my blame.
But it wasn't mine in the first place,
And I won't bear your shame.

You made me feel
Like I was so beautiful;
But now you changed your mind
And now the landscape isn't so suitable.

Now, with not only
A heavy heart, but a hurting mind,
I ponder your words and try to decide
If I should be cruel or kind.

In the end of my thoughts, though
I chose not to inflict damage like you.
I'm not that cruel, for I know
That to someone else I am a jewel.

So I left you with
No malice or spite
But left you hoping
That you see the light.

This is to my (now, for the third time) ex-boyfriend, and it is about the really cruel and damaging things he said to me when I told him that no matter how much I tried to make my broken heart love him again that I couldn't. He accused me of being like everyone else and being a liar and things like that. All because I didn't want to talk sexual with him when he wanted to, and because I couldn't make myself love him after what he did to me. It hurts like hell right now, but I'll get over it. I'll make it out of this darkness, I'm sure. I've been through deeper, more depressing darkness. Sometimes when you love someone, it's better to let them go, and hope that they end up better in the future. Right?

If you liked this poem, please give me a vote. If you can relate, please leave a comment. I love you all and pray for the pain to make you of better use to God, like it has for me. It'll make you stronger and better, I promise. This storm won't last forever, so weather it to see the sun.