Tip Toe Romance (A Dan Howell/Danisnotonfire Fan Fiction)

All Notes Lead To Phil

(SAM) 

*The Next Day*

I woke up next to Phil but opposite him. I am about as far from him as possible without leaving the bed. He tried to hold me all night, but I just shoved him away. I feel like when I yelled at him I opened up. All of the anger I've been holding in all these months just came out. I just can't stand to be near him. Phil is still sleeping. His ebony hair is sweeps over his eyes and his mouth gapes slightly open with each deep breath. I still love him, but I just can't handle him right now. He barely made an effort while our relationship was falling to shreds. All he cared about was the fact that his best friend might possibly in the slightest chance hurt his sister. It's pretty ridiculous, if you think about it. Dan loves her more than his own life. I was afraid he might kill himself when she left. Thankfully he didn't. 

I swing my legs over the side of the bed and adjust the strap on my tank top so it's no longer falling over my shoulder. I grab a navy blue jumper and throw it over the top and tighten the strings on my sweat pants. I look over to my phone and see a text from an anonymous number. '7:00 P.M <3' It must be a wrong number. I grab my mobile and walk into the kitchen from my room. Liza is standing there pouring a glass of orange juice. "Morning Liza." I say with a yawn "Morning Sammy," she starts cheerfully, "how'd you sleep?" she asks taking her glass to the breakfast bar. "Fine, Phil and I are still...." "No need." She says shaking a finger at me "I understand, love." I look now at the ground and utter a small "Thanks". I turn to the cupboard and grab the cereal and then turn to the one opposite it to grab a bowl. It had a small note taped to the inside. It read, 'Will be better <3' It was almost like the note and the text were linked. If I didn't know any better, I would think it's a murderer leading me to my doom like in Sherlock. Damn, I don't trust it.

I pour the cereal and milk into the bowl and make my way over to Liza who is chatting to Dan who has his arms wrapped around her from behind. "Hey Dan." I say with a small and defeated tone. "Hey?" Dan says questioningly. He looks over to Eliza and she says a quiet, "Relationship troubles" Which she thought I couldn't hear, but frankly, I did. She winks at him and he smiles almost manically. Okay? Maybe they are the murderers leaving the notes. "Hey, there is a baking class that's going on at 5:30 until 7:20. You want to go with me? Liza and Phil need some brother-sister time to, you know, patch things up." Dan says and I think for a moment and reply, "Sure." What's the worst thing that could happen? That's what the ones who always die fist say. Oh, shut it. "Okay, be ready at 5:20, yeah? It's literally right across the street." "Alright," I reply with a nod.  I take my bowl and go into our small lounge. I switch on the tv and zone out watching Dr. Who. I soon drift into deep thought. 

What should I do with Phil? I still love him with all my heart. I wish everything wasn't so complicated. Was did I get myself into? Going to London hurt Liza and I. I've tried to be the glue that holds us all together. I've held them all while they've cried. I talked them out of killing each other and I've done my best from keeping them alive. But sometimes glue gives out after a while. I'm sick and tired of trying and getting nothing out of it. Sure Daliza is back together but what about Phil and I? We are worse than ever. I want to hug him, kiss him, love him, or even just talk to him again. I know he's trying, but some things can never fixed after they are broken. It would take a lot to fix my heart. 

The dark ebony haired man I love walks through the door way and sits next to me. We both say nothing for a while. The air is full of awkward silence.  I can see him looking at me from the corner of my eye. My hair is pulled back into a pony tail but my dark fringe falls over my eyes. His leg is barely touching mine and it takes everything I have in me not to cuddle into him and breathe in his scent of Old Spice (A/N Your welcome Gabbie) once again. I stay steady and soon the tension gets to be too much and I walk out. I walk down the hallway and into my room. I fall onto my bed and pull a pillow over my face and scream. No tears fall, just screams of frustration erupt. I turn onto my back and stare at the ceiling. No thoughts run through my head. I am an empty shell,tired of holding on too long.