My encounter with life #Wattys2016 #JustWriteIt

Chapter 12

I pulled back from that little, gentle kiss and looked straight into his eyes. It wasn't a planned move; I've always been shy and reserved. But in that very second I felt like giving my fortune another chance, to tell him about my feelings because life is shorter than I'd ever imagined and that I wanted to start my New Year by kissing the love of my life. Just when I was about to open my mouth to speak about my feelings Alisha screamed of excessive pain in her abdomen. We rushed her to the hospital. There was nothing much that could be done for her to revive. For a person to revive, the immunity power stands as the highest. Her immune was as thinner as her waist. The extortive diets that she'd followed, all the liquors that she'd gulped down in parties was now pushing her into the fathomless-dark well and she could do nothing but lay amidst the chaotic medical equipments, getting injected with different combination of drugs, with the nerve clenching pain and her eyes were not frightful anymore, her eyes reflected clemency and unlike all other clemencies this one was more about the silence after the storm had passed, leaving just imprints and in her case she was about to leave her imprint. The endless sobs of her mother gave me Goosebumps and for a second I wanted to leave everything and go far away where there're no humans but mountains that echo beatitude.

After spending a week in hospital she finally returned home, "We don't really see much of a purpose to keep her here" said the doctor while signing her discharge papers. I guess he couldn't put "take her home she will die there" in proper words and left that for us to decode.

I sat in the balcony of my apartment and scrolled through the pictures in my phone's gallery. I opened the chat window of Alisha and saw her last seen. Suddenly it changed into online. My phone fell from my hand. The chilly breeze of January surrounded me with an eerie and my heart was pumping faster than ever. I closed my eyes and soon tears flooded my eyes and turned my parched cheeks wet. "She isn't dead" I said to myself and then repeated it until my racing heartbeat settled. I collected the pieces of my phone, fixed them and switched it on. She was now offline. I typed a good night message and went to sleep.

The next day I went to her place when the maid was cleaning her. She would only wear those side strap hospital wears as it was easy to handle in the hands of the maid. I felt sorry for her. And I hated me for being pitiful towards her.

"How're you feeling?" I queried however knowing the answer already.

"Tired,"

"Rest" I said when Aditya came in.

"I'll go talk to your mother" I added and left.

Since the night of the kiss I haven't talked tohim and it has nothing to do with shame whatsoever. He tried to talk many timesbut I always found ways to avoid. I feel exceptionally guilty. While I wasbeginning my New Year by kissing him, my best friend was dying beside me. Istill remember back in school when she would come in the class withoutcompleting her homework I would also not submit mine and share the punishmentwith her. Unfortunately I cannot share her cancer. I cannot share her death.