Chapter 6

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CECE'S POV

       After the beach, we all came back to the house. Luke said he has to go back home for a little while. Ash offered to stay. Calum and Mikey wanted to stay but I feel like maybe they should go home to their families. I honestly didn't even want Ash to stay but he was persistent about it. Luke at the moment was packing. I helped Ash clean the living room. Luke looked in deep thought. "You okay?" I asked Luke. "Yeah. Just thinking Ben really needs me at home" Luke said and hugged me. Luke and the boys said their goodbyes and left.  "We should dye your hair again" Ash said. "I think I'm going to leave this color for a while." I said. "Cece why don't we go make some flower crowns" Vanessa said. I giggled and agreed. We went outside.  Vanessa and I started making some flower crowns. "The wedding is in the summer" Vanessa said. "I think you should wear a flower crown on your wedding day" I said. "Maybe cause I might want my brides maids to wear them" Vanessa said. I put the flower crown on Ash. We burst out into a fit of giggles. "You look so adorable." I said. "Cece look what I found today at the mall. I just put it on the babies" Jamie came out with the twins in hand. 

          I took a picture of them for instagram and sent it to Liz

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          I took a picture of them for instagram and sent it to Liz. I smiled and giggled. Ash smiled at how cute they looked. We go inside and I help Jamie start making dinner. Ash is in the living room with Vanessa and the kids. I hear him getting the guitar we had. He started singing twinkle twinkle little star. "So are you and Luke looking for an apartment for the twins yet or house?" Jamie asks as he cut the veggies. "I'm not sure what's happening cause they might just go back on tour soon Jamie" I said. "Well whatever you choose to do I'm here for you" Jamie kissed my forehead. 


            It's been 3 days later. I was sitting on the couch with Ash and I still haven't gotten a text or call from Luke. I was worried. Ash isn't really letting me go on twitter which I don't get why. We are currently watching some news. 

           "Breaking News: Luke Hemmings was caught getting out of a clinic in LA with ex girlfriend Azraylea Rodriguez. Sources say she is pregnant with his baby. Isn't Luke the father of current girlfriend Cierra Torres's  children? " The reporter said. I stared at the TV. Fabian and Jamie heard the reporter. "Cece?" Jamie said. I get up and walked away. I ignored the calls from Jamie and Fabian. Ash looked at me with sympathy. That was the reason he didn't want me to go on twitter. Luke lied to me. I looked down to my phone. It was a call from  Liz. I declined it. Then I had over 30 calls from Cal, Mikey, Liz, Jack, Ben and Luke. I got on Twitter. 

@Little_Cece09: It's funny how you always make the mistake of forgiving someone who you thought loved you and wanted to be there for their family. I was so wrong. I am done.... I want nothing to do with that person. Goodbye LRH.... Hope you don't bail on the next family... 

    I blocked Luke's number. I went and locked myself in my room. I wanted to be alone. I feel like such an idiot. I wanted to just be alone. I put my headphones in and ignored everyone. 


  "She says she wants to end it all when she's all alone in her room
She cries
The way she feels inside is too much for her
When all you got is these four walls
It's not that hard to feel so small
Or even exist at all
How come no one heard her when she said

Maybe I'm better off dead
If I was would it finally be enough
To shut out all those voices in my head?
Maybe I'm better off dead
Better off dead!
Did you hear a word
Hear a word I said?
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
Gone, gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone

She doesn't know she's beautiful
'Cause no one's ever told her so
And the demons that she hides are all she knows
And maybe she can fall in love with someone in her life that she could trust
And tell her she's enough (will someone tell her she's enough?)
How come no one heard her when she said

Maybe I'm better off dead
If I was would it finally be enough
To shut out all those voices in my head?
Maybe I'm better off dead
Better off dead!
Did you hear a word
Hear a word I said?
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone

When all you got is these four walls
It's not hard to feel so small
When all you got is these four walls
It's not hard to feel so small
All she wanted was to be enough
All she wanted was to be enough
So what does it take?
Maybe it's not too late
Yeah no one heard her when she said

Maybe I'm better off dead
If I was would it finally be enough
To shut out all those voices in my head?
Maybe I'm better off dead
Better off dead!
Did you hear a word
Hear a word I said?
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
Gone, gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone
Gone, gone
This is not where I belong
You're gonna miss me when I'm gone"
 

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