GUILT

Chapter 10

       Ever since Chantelle left the hospital, she hasn't been the same. Her feelings, thoughts, and emotions were completely messed up. She went home first to clean her face and wiped the mascara from around her eyes. She became even more emotional as she sat at the edge of her bed where the two of them had sex. Her heart was tremendously broken by the fact that she thought he was the one. How could I be so foolish? she thought to herself. Chantelle decided after she got herself together that she would visit her mom. She just wasn't ready to talk to Shay yet because she knew she would have to explain the situation to her. Chantelle got into her car and drove to her mother's house. Her mother stayed on the nicer side of town. Most of the people who lived over there were around her age or older. The houses were well decorated on the outside and the front lawns were very green and bright. Chantelle turned down her radio as she drove into the driveway. Her mother kept her house decorated on the outside with ornaments and flowers. Chantelle rang the doorbell because she couldn't find her keys in time.

"Now who could this be ringing my bell?" Her mother asked through the door. Ms. Mayson was a beautiful older lady that was very wise and passionate. She lived alone and kept her house very well kept. 

"Mama, you already know," Chantelle grinned.

Ms. Mayson greeted her with open arms. "How's mama's baby doing?" She closed the door behind Chantelle and walked over to the living room.

"I'm good mama, but I've had better days." Chantelle placed her phone on the coffee table and sat on the sofa.

"Well tell me about it. No wait let me guess, this has to do with some 'lil boy doesn't it?" Ms. Mayson took a seat on the other sofa and became very interested into Chantelle's problem.

"Mama, now you know I don't do 'lil boys," Chantelle chuckled. "But it does has to do with a guy I recently started talking to."

"Well, tell me about it. I knew something was up when you couldn't talk to me over the phone early. I know I said I missed you but I wasn't expecting you to show up so this has to be something serious. C'mon tell me what's going on."

Chantelle told her mother everything that happened between her and Trae, the fight, and the hospital. Her voice cracked when she told her mom how she told Trae that she should have left him where he was. Her mom knew that she really felt strongly about him, so she got up and sat next to her and wrapped her into her arms. 

"Chantelle, baby, it's going to be okay. I can promise you that. You don't need any man to make you feel used, let alone less than what you are. You need someone who is going to be beneficial to you and will care about you. And if he doesn't see that, then that's his loss."

Chantelle sat up and wiped her face. She really needed some encouraging advice. Her mom got up from the sofa to fix some warm lemon tea and sat the cups on the coffee table. She had a way of knowing how to comfort Chantelle during her heartbreaks in the past.

"You had a piece of mail come in just the other day." Her mom started fumbling through some papers on the table. "It's from JT," she handed Chantelle the envelope.

"JT? Why would he be mailing to here? Why would he be mailing me period?" Chantelle sat her cup down and opened the envelope. 

JT was Chantelle's ex. The one who she shared countless memories with and was the love of her life at a point in time. They broke up because they knew they were going seperate ways after high school. He started talking to another female during their relationship but right before they broke up. What could he want? Chantelle thought. 

   Dear Chantelle,

  I know it's been sometime now but I wanted to say how sorry I was for letting you go. You are a beautiful woman with a beautiful personality. You kept me going for a long time and I wanted to just let you know that you still cross my mind from time to time. Trying to play you after high school was the dumbest thing I could have ever done and I am deeply sorry for hurting you. I put my past aside and we're both grown now. I would love if you could give me another chance.