Perfectly Imperfect

chapter 3

3-18-15

Dear diary,

I'm sad today. I'm sad because one of my best friends named Kate started to cut herself again. Yes, I meant to put the word again in there, this isn't the first time she's done it before. It kills me that she could so such a thing to her own beautiful body.

When she showed me the cuts I wasn't expecting as many cuts as there were. Both arms were covered in at least a dozen cuts, and there were scars leading up and down her arm.

I tried to give her this huge lecture about how terrible it is to harm yourself, but sadly she wouldn't listen. She practically shut down every time I attempted to bring it up.Why would she show me the cuts if she doesn't want help? Does she just want attention? No, there's no way that someone could hurt themselves just for attention.

Throughout the week I tried to bring it up and tell her to stop, and eventually she finally spoke to me about it. Sadly though, all she had to say to me was that I didn't know shit about pain. Right when she said that it made my entire perspective of her change. I became incredibly furious at her. Here I am trying to reach out and help her and all she did was criticize me. I mean yeah, I know she's stressed and obviously going through tough times, but that gives her no right to say that to me.

I feel like Kate has a perfect life. She has a gigantic two story house, a boat, a camper, happily married parents, and just overall a happy family. Kate told me the reason she cuts herself is because her parents yelled at her too much. I know this is a rude thing to say about such a close friend, but I feel like she's being extremely over dramatic.

Her life is so privileged, she just doesn't get it. I would kill to have her life. My life sucks for reasons that I don't want to speak of. If someone ever snatches this diary I don't want them knowing my personal family stuff so I'm keeping that hidden inside (sorry diary).

It seems like some people just don't understand how amazing and privileged their lives really are. Funny how some people think my life is perfect. Maybe one day it really will be. Til then...

xoxo,
Dakota