Beyond The Scenes; Poems

Rules

You don't realise in how much problems you got me,

and all the discutions I had to confront.

I'm not very social, or good and relax in big groups,

I'm not what I apear to be, I'm bigger and better.

The hours I speant talking to you, even though it was 11 o' clock pm, or more late,

You know the rules in my house and the ones it suposes I don't break.

I'm not shure if what I feel is love, or if is more than a crush, more than a like, more than a love.

Really confuse of all what happening in my mind at ones, All ready lost the count of how many times someone has asked me if I like you, or you like me?

I'm not shure at all of that, but I'm shure of one truly thing; maybe I'm not in love with you but I love the feelings that you cause in me.

How I feel that I could talk you about anything and you wouldn't judge me, just advice me with your words that can make my heart go very fast or stop.

The adrenaline I feel in my veins every time is late and you know I'm not supose to be conected at that hour, and you know the reasons, but you still ask why.

The fear that I have that my mom come and turn of the internet and I can't text you more, the emotion that I have at the next day at seeing it and respond.

I'm not perfect, I have many imperfections, I'm not the best students but I am very inteligent and see the world in a different way or perspective.

Sometimes I think it's just stupid that think this cause there is no posibility that we can be somethibg more, just look at me, I'm a desaster, a catastrofy...a mistake.

You all ready have your future resolved, prepared, you know where you'll go, what study, where to work and I kbow I'm not in it.

I wish I could read your mind for knowing what you think about me, what I am for you, a friend... ?

Better just forget it, ignore what I said, forget my existence and the fact that you know me.

Maybe is the best for us to don't talk, you would rest me some future problems.

Once I tryed, I was doing it very good, one moth and not a text, I missed it... maybe, but then you neather said hello, you just asked me how I am? if a am good?

Cause somehow you knew that I had some problems and with that you screw up my plan.

I start thinking if this was my destiny, end up alone?

I have a life to go on with...

A family that needs me.

Maybe the cause that they don't let me go out with friends (boys) is cause she don't wants that I go out hurt or that someone be rude with me

But I want you to be rude with me, give me a leson of what life really is, teach me knew experiences that I need to discover, make me feel diferent things and maybe just maybe this won't be the end....