Vodka Over Love

{07} Florescent Adolescents

Just lie to them

It can't hurt

When she walks in you will be strong and you will look straight into her eyes and you will tell her the sexiest made up story ever because you are a writer and that's what you do

Get amped.

Everything is good

Everything is great

I heard Sid knock and I became silent within my own head, I heard her key giggled into the door and then watched intently as it opened, she greeted me with a casual smile and a wink, "so how was it."

I burst into tears.

"It couldn't have been that bad.." She murmured softly.

"In the words of the Arctic Monkeys, if I had to choose between mega dobber and battered pencil, it was a battered pencil."

She made a face, "oh shit."

"I feel like I've lost all control of my life."

She rubbed my back slowly and I was glad Tiffany wasn't around to see me fall apart, I wasn't one to sub come to my emotions but when I did It was generally only in Sid's presence.

"Babe," she laughed lightly. "just because you had bad sex with one guy doesn't mean you've lost all control of your life."

"S, I started counting the glow in the dark stars on our ceiling about 20 seconds into it."

"How many are there?"

"SID"

"I'm being serious, I'm genuinely curious about how many we stuck up there!" She paused as if it were my cue to laugh than continued when the silence only grew thicker. "This is not the end of the world, don't let one tiny penis ruin your slutty phase."

I rested my head in my hands, covering my face and mourning my lost dignity. "How can someone so beautiful be so under equipped."

"I feel like that's how it works."

My voice broke again, "well that's false advertisement!" The tears wouldn't stop.

"So you are fine when your boyfriend of three years cheats on you, but if you encounter one single chode you fall apart?"

I nodded.

"Do you want something? Popsicles?" she asked sweetly.

I shook my head.

"Pancakes?"

Denied again.

"Taco Bell?"

I stayed silent.

"Yeah? A 5- Layer Beefy Bean Burrito going to make all your penis problem melt away?"

I looked up, feeling the weight of my tear polluted eyes and nodded, "I wouldn't mind that."

When we got in the car I immediately flipped on the radio but Sid turned it down, "So you want to try and take someone else to the hookah bar?"

I turned it back up. "No."

"Because?" She smacked my hand and again switched it to a lower volume.

I groaned, "because what if everyone has a smaller bratwurst than Jessie and I'm forever stuck with bad sex. I can't go through the process of thinking someone's super cute again just to find out I need a magnifying glass to locate their genitals."